glaucus-第18章

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I　speak　from　experience；　for　it　was　not　so　very　long　ago　that；　in　

the　north　of　Devon；　I　found　sermons；　not　indeed　in　stones；　but　in　a　

creature　reputed　among　the　most　worthless　of　sea…vermin。　　I　had　

been　lounging　about　all　the　morning　on　the　little　pier；　waiting；　

with　the　rest　of　the　village；　for　a　trawling　breeze　which　would　not　

come。　　Two　o'clock　was　past；　and　still　the　red　mainsails　of　the　

skiffs　hung　motionless；　and　their　images　quivered　head　downwards　in　

the　glassy　swell；





〃As　idle　as　a　painted　ship

Upon　a　painted　ocean。〃





It　was　neap…tide；　too；　and　therefore　nothing　could　be　done　among　

the　rocks。　　So；　in　despair；　finding　an　old　coast…guard　friend　

starting　for　his　lobster…pots；　I　determined　to　save　the　old　man's　

arms；　by　rowing　him　up　the　shore；　and　then　paddled　homeward　again；　

under　the　high　green　northern　wall；　five　hundred　feet　of　cliff　

furred　to　the　water's　edge　with　rich　oak　woods；　against　whose　base　

the　smooth　Atlantic　swell　died　whispering；　as　if　curling　itself　up　

to　sleep　at　last　within　that　sheltered　nook；　tired　with　its　weary　

wanderings。　　The　sun　sank　lower　and　lower　behind　the　deer…park　

point；　the　white　stair　of　houses　up　the　glen　was　wrapped　every　

moment　deeper　and　deeper　in　hazy　smoke　and　shade；　as　the　light　

faded；　the　evening　fires　were　lighted　one　by　one；　the　soft　murmur　

of　the　waterfall；　and　the　pleasant　laugh　of　children；　and　the　

splash　of　homeward　oars；　came　clearer　and　clearer　to　the　ear　at　

every　stroke：　　and　as　we　rowed　on；　arose　the　recollection　of　many　a　

brave　and　wise　friend；　whose　lot　was　cast　in　no　such　western　

paradise；　but　rather　in　the　infernos　of　this　sinful　earth；　toiling　

even　then　amid　the　festering　alleys　of　Bermondsey　and　Bethnal　

Green；　to　palliate　death　and　misery　which　they　had　vainly　laboured　

to　prevent；　watching　the　strides　of　that　very　cholera　which　they　

had　been　striving　for　years　to　ward　off；　now　re…admitted　in　spite　

of　all　their　warnings；　by　the　carelessness；　and　laziness；　and　greed　

of　sinful　man。　　And　as　I　thought　over　the　whole　hapless　question　of　

sanitary　reform；　proved　long　since　a　moral　duty　to　God　and　man；　

possible；　easy；　even　pecuniarily　profitable；　and　yet　left　undone；　

there　seemed　a　sublime　irony；　most　humbling　to　man；　in　some　of　

Nature's　processes；　and　in　the　silent　and　unobtrusive　perfection　

with　which　she　has　been　taught　to　anticipate；　since　the　foundation　

of　the　world；　some　of　the　loftiest　discoveries　of　modern　science；　

of　which　we　are　too　apt　to　boast　as　if　we　had　created　the　method　by　

discovering　its　possibility。　　Created　it？　　Alas　for　the　pride　of　

human　genius；　and　the　autotheism　which　would　make　man　the　measure　

of　all　things；　and　the　centre　of　the　universe！　　All　the　invaluable　

laws　and　methods　of　sanitary　reform　at　best　are　but　clumsy　

imitations　of　the　unseen　wonders　which　every　animalcule　and　leaf　

have　been　working　since　the　world's　foundation；　with　this　slight　

difference　between　them　and　us；　that　they　fulfil　their　appointed　

task；　and　we　do　not。



The　sickly　geranium　which　spreads　its　blanched　leaves　against　the　

cellar　panes；　and　peers　up；　as　if　imploringly；　to　the　narrow　slip　

of　sunlight　at　the　top　of　the　narrow　alley；　had　it　a　voice；　could　

tell　more　truly　than　ever　a　doctor　in　the　town；　why　little　Bessy　

sickened　of　the　scarlatina；　and　little　Johnny　of　the　hooping…cough；　

till　the　toddling　wee　things　who　used　to　pet　and　water　it　were　

carried　off　each　and　all　of　them　one　by　one　to　the　churchyard　

sleep；　while　the　father　and　mother　sat　at　home；　trying　to　supply　by　

gin　that　very　vital　energy　which　fresh　air　and　pure　water；　and　the　

balmy　breath　of　woods　and　heaths；　were　made　by　God　to　give；　and　how　

the　little　geranium　did　its　best；　like　a　heaven…sent　angel；　to　

right　the　wrong　which　man's　ignorance　had　begotten；　and　drank　in；　

day　by　day；　the　poisoned　atmosphere；　and　formed　it　into　fair　green　

leaves；　and　breathed　into　the　children's　faces　from　every　pore；　

whenever　they　bent　over　it；　the　life…giving　oxygen　for　which　their　

dulled　blood　and　festered　lungs　were　craving　in　vain；　fulfilling　

God's　will　itself；　though　man　would　not；　too　careless　or　too　

covetous　to　see；　after　thousands　of　years　of　boasted　progress；　why　

God　had　covered　the　earth　with　grass；　herb；　and　tree；　a　living　and　

life…giving　garment　of　perpetual　health　and　youth。



It　is　too　sad　to　think　long　about；　lest　we　become　very　

Heraclituses。　　Let　us　take　the　other　side　of　the　matter　with　

Democritus；　try　to　laugh　man　out　of　a　little　of　his　boastful　

ignorance　and　self…satisfied　clumsiness；　and　tell　him；　that　if　the　

House　of　Commons　would　but　summon　one　of　the　little　Paramecia　from　

any　Thames'　sewer…mouth；　to　give　his　evidence　before　their　next　

Cholera　Committee；　sanitary　blue…books；　invaluable　as　they　are；　

would　be　superseded　for　ever　and　a　day；　and　sanitary　reformers　

would　no　longer　have　to　confess；　that　they　know　of　no　means　of　

stopping　the　smells　which　in　past　hot　summers　drove　the　members　out　

of　the　House；　and　the　judges　out　of　Westminster　Hall。



Nay；　in　the　boat　at　the　minute　of　which　I　have　been　speaking；　

silent　and　neglected；　sat　a　fellow…passenger；　who　was　a　greater　

adept　at　removing　nuisances　than　the　whole　Board　of　Health　put　

together；　and　who　had　done　his　work；　too；　with　a　cheapness　

unparalleled；　for　all　his　good　deeds　had　not　as　yet　cost　the　State　

one　penny。　　True；　he　lived　by　his　business；　so　do　other　inspectors　

of　nuisances：　　but　Nature；　instead　of　paying　Maia　Squinado；　

Esquire；　some　five　hundred　pounds　sterling　per　annum　for　his　

labour；　had　contrived；　with　a　sublime　simplicity　of　economy　which　

Mr。　Hume　might　have　envied　and　admired　afar　off；　to　make　him　do　his　

work　gratis；　by　giving　him　the　nuisances　as　his　perquisites；　and　

teaching　him　how　to　eat　them。　　Certainly　（without　going　the　length　

of　the　Caribs；　who　upheld　cannibalism　because；　they　said；　it　made　

war　cheap；　and　precluded　entirely　the　need　of　a　commissariat）；　this　

cardinal　virtue　of　cheapness　ought　to　make　Squinado　an　interesting　

object　in　the　eyes　of　the　present　generation；　especially　as　he　was　

at　that　moment　a　true　sanitary　martyr；　having；　like　many　of　his　

human　fellow…workers；　got　into　a　fearful　scrape　by　meddling　with　

those　existing　interests；　and　〃vested　rights　which　are　but　vested　

wrongs；〃　which　have　proved　fatal　already　to　more　than　one　Board　of　

Health。　　For　last　night；　as　he　was　sitting　quietly　under　a　stone　in　

four　fathoms　water；　he　became　aware　（whether　by　sight；　smell；　or　

that　mysterious　sixth　sense；　to　us　unknown；　which　seems　to　reside　

in　his　delicate　feelers）　of　a　palpable　nuisance　somewhere　in　the　

neighbourhood；　and；　like　a　trusty　servant　of　the　public；　turned　out　

of　his　bed　instantly　and　went　in　search；　till　he　discovered；　

hanging　among　what　he　judged　to　be　the　stems　of　ore…weed　

（Laminaria）；　three　or　four　large　pieces　of　stale　thornback；　of　most　

evil　savour；　and　highly　prejudicial　to　the　purity　of　the　sea；　and　

the　health　of　the　neighbouring　herrings。　　Happy　Squinado！　　He　

needed　not　to　discover　the　limits　of　his　authority；　to　consult　any　

lengthy　Nuisances'　Removal　Act；　with　its　clauses；　and　counter…

clauses；　and　explanations　of　interpretations；　and　interpretations　

of　explanations。　　Nature；　who　can　afford　to　be　arbitrary；　because　

she　is　perfect；　and　to　give　her　servants　irresponsible　powers；　

because　she　has　trained　them　to　their　work；　had　bestowed　on　him　and　

on　his　forefathers；　as　general　health　inspectors；　those　very　

summary　powers　of　entrance　and　removal　in　the　watery　realms　for　

which　common　sense；　public　opinion；　and　private　philanthropy　are　

still　entreating　vainly　in　the　terrestrial　realms；　so　finding　a　

hole；　in　he　went；　and　began　to　remove　the　nuisance；　without　

〃waiting　twenty…four　hours；〃　〃laying　an　information；〃　〃serving　a　

notice；〃　or　any　other　vain　delay。　　The　evil　was　there；　…　and　there　

it　should　not　stay；　so　having　neither　cart　nor　barrow；　he　just　

began　putting　it　into　his　stomach；　and　in　the　meanwhile　set　his　

assistants　to　work　likewise。　　For　suppose　not；　gentle　reader；　that　

Squinado　went　alone；　in　his　train　were　more　than　a　hundred　thousand　

as　good　as　he；　each　in　his　office；　and　as　cheaply　paid；　who　needed　

no　cumbrous　baggage　train　of　force…pumps；　hose；　chloride　of　lime　

packets；　whitewash；　pails　or　brushes；　but　were　every　man　his　own　

instrument；　and；　to　save　expense　of　transit；　just　grew　on　

Squinado's　back。　　Do　you　doubt　the　assertion？　　Then　lift　him　up　

hither；　and　putting　him　gently　into　that　shallow　jar　of　salt　water；　

look　at　him　through　the　hand…magnifier；　and　see　how　Nature　is　

maxima　in　minimis。



There　he　sits；　twiddling　his　feelers　（a　substitute；　it　seems；　with　

crustacea　for　biting　their　nails　when　they　are　puzzled）；　and　by　no　

means　lovely　to　look　on　in　vulgar　eyes；　…　about　the　bigness　of　a　

man's　fist；　a　round…bodied；　spindle…shanked；　crusty；　prickly；　dirty　

fellow；　with　a　villanous　squint；　too；　in　those　little　bony　eyes；　

which　never　look　for　a　moment　both　the　same　way。　　Never　mind：　　many　

a　man　of　genius　is　ungainly　enough；　and　Nature；　if　you　will　

observe；　as　if　to　make　up　to　him　for　his　uncomeliness；　has　arrayed　

him　as　Solomon　in　all　his　glory　never　was　arrayed；　and　so　fulfilled　

one　of　the　proposals　of　old　Fourier　…　that　scavengers；　chimney…

sweeps；　and　other　workers　in　disgusting　employments；　should　be　

rewarded　for　their　self…sacrifice　in　behalf　of　the　public　weal　by　

some　peculiar　badge　of　honour；　or　laurel　crown。　　Not　that　his　

crown；　like　those　of　the　old　Greek　games；　is　a　mere　useless　badge；　

on　the　contrary；　his　robe　of　state　is　composed　of　his　fellow…

servants。　　His　whole　back　is　covered　with　a　little　grey　forest　of　

branching　hairs；　fine　as　a　spider's　web；　each　branchlet　carrying　

its　little　pearly　ringed　club；　each　club　its　rose…coloured　polype；　

like　（to　quote　Mr。　Gosse's　comparison）　the　unexpanded　birds　of　the　

acacia。　（28）



On　that　leg　grows；　amid　another　copse　of　the　grey　polypes；　a　

delicate　straw…coloured　Sertularia；　branch　on　branch　of　tiny　double　

combs；　each　tooth　of　the　comb　being　a　tube　containing　a　living　

flower；　on　another　leg　another　Sertularia；　coarser；　but　still　

beautiful；　and　round　it　again　has　trained　itself；　parasitic　on　the　

parasite；　plant　upon　plant　of　glass　ivy；　bearing　crystal　bells；　

（29）　each　of　which；　too；　protrudes　its　living　flower；　on　another　

leg　is　a　fresh　species；　like　a　little　heather…bush　of　whitest　

ivory；　（30）　and　every　needle　leaf　a　polype　cell　…　let　us　stop　

before　the　imagination　grows　dizzy　with　the　contemplation　of　those　

myriads　of　beautiful　atomies。　　And　what　is　their　use？　　Each　living　

flower；　each　polype　mouth　is　feeding　fast；　sweeping　into　itself；　by　

the　perpetual　currents　caused　by　the　delicate　fringes　upon　its　rays　

（so　minute　these　last；　that　their　motion　only　betrays　their　

presence）；　each　tiniest　atom　of　decaying　ma