david copperfield(大卫.科波维尔)-第11章
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and it was one of them who had done it。
‘Davy；’ said my mother。 ‘What’s the matter？’
I thought it was very strange that she should ask me； and
answered； ‘Nothing。’ I turned over on my face； I recollect； to hide
my trembling lip； which answered her with greater truth。 ‘Davy；’
said my mother。 ‘Davy； my child！’
I dare say no words she could have uttered would have affected
me so much； then； as her calling me her child。 I hid my tears in the
bedclothes； and pressed her from me with my hand； when she
would have raised me up。
‘This is your doing； Peggotty； you cruel thing！’ said my mother。
‘I have no doubt at all about it。 How can you reconcile it to your
conscience； I wonder； to prejudice my own boy against me； or
against anybody who is dear to me？ What do you mean by it；
Peggotty？’
Poor Peggotty lifted up her hands and eyes； and only answered；
in a sort of paraphrase of the grace I usually repeated after dinner；
‘Lord forgive you； Mrs。 Copperfield； and for what you have said
this minute； may you never be truly sorry！’
‘It’s enough to distract me；’ cried my mother。 ‘In my
honeymoon； too； when my most inveterate enemy might relent；
one would think； and not envy me a little peace of mind and
happiness。 Davy； you naughty boy！ Peggotty； you savage creature！
Oh； dear me！’ cried my mother； turning from one of us to the
other； in her pettish wilful manner； ‘what a troublesome world this
is； when one has the most right to expect it to be as agreeable as
possible！’
I felt the touch of a hand that I knew was neither hers nor
Peggotty’s； and slipped to my feet at the bed…side。 It was Mr。
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David Copperfield
Murdstone’s hand； and he kept it on my arm as he said：
‘What’s this？ Clara； my love； have you forgotten？—Firmness；
my dear！’
‘I am very sorry； Edward；’ said my mother。 ‘I meant to be very
good； but I am so uncomfortable。’
‘Indeed！’ he answered。 ‘That’s a bad hearing； so soon； Clara。’
‘I say it’s very hard I should be made so now；’ returned my
mother； pouting； ‘and it is—very hard—isn’t it？’
He drew her to him； whispered in her ear； and kissed her。 I
knew as well； when I saw my mother’s head lean down upon his
shoulder； and her arm touch his neck—I knew as well that he
could mould her pliant nature into any form he chose； as I know；
now； that he did it。
‘Go you below； my love；’ said Mr。 Murdstone。 ‘David and I will
come down； together。 My friend；’ turning a darkening face on
Peggotty； when he had watched my mother out； and dismissed her
with a nod and a smile； ‘do you know your mistress’s name？’
‘She has been my mistress a long time； sir；’ answered Peggotty；
‘I ought to know it。’
‘That’s true；’ he answered。 ‘But I thought I heard you； as I came
upstairs； address her by a name that is not hers。 She has taken
mine； you know。 Will you remember that？’
Peggotty； with some uneasy glances at me； curtseyed herself
out of the room without replying； seeing； I suppose； that she was
expected to go； and had no excuse for remaining。 When we two
were left alone； he shut the door； and sitting on a chair； and
holding me standing before him； looked steadily into my eyes。 I
felt my own attracted； no less steadily； to his。 As I recall our being
opposed thus； face to face； I seem again to hear my heart beat fast
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David Copperfield
and high。
‘David；’ he said； making his lips thin； by pressing them
together； ‘if I have an obstinate horse or dog to deal with； what do
you think I do？’
‘I don’t know。’
‘I beat him。’
I had answered in a kind of breathless whisper； but I felt； in my
silence； that my breath was shorter now。
‘I make him wince； and smart。 I say to myself； “I’ll conquer that
fellow”； and if it were to cost him all the blood he had； I should do
it。 What is that upon your face？’
‘Dirt；’ I said。
He knew it was the mark of tears as well as I。 But if he had
asked the question twenty times； each time with twenty blows； I
believe my baby heart would have burst before I would have told
him so。
‘You have a good deal of intelligence for a little fellow；’ he said；
with a grave smile that belonged to him； ‘and you understood me
very well； I see。 Wash that face； sir； and come down with me。’
He pointed to the washing…stand； which I had made out to be
like Mrs。 Gummidge； and motioned me with his head to obey him
directly。 I had little doubt then； and I have less doubt now； that he
would have knocked me down without the least compunction； if I
had hesitated。
‘Clara； my dear；’ he said； when I had done his bidding； and he
walked me into the parlour； with his hand still on my arm； ‘you
will not be made uncomfortable any more； I hope。 We shall soon
improve our youthful humours。’
God help me； I might have been improved for my whole life； I
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David Copperfield
might have been made another creature perhaps； for life； by a
kind word at that season。 A word of encouragement and
explanation； of pity for my childish ignorance； of welcome home；
of reassurance to me that it was home； might have made me
dutiful to him in my heart henceforth； instead of in my hypocritical
outside； and might have made me respect instead of hate him。 I
thought my mother was sorry to see me standing in the room so
scared and strange； and that； presently； when I stole to a chair； she
followed me with her eyes more sorrowfully still—missing；
perhaps； some freedom in my childish tread—but the word was
not spoken； and the time for it was gone。
We dined alone； we three together。 He seemed to be very fond
of my mother—I am afraid I liked him none the better for that—
and she was very fond of him。 I gathered from what they said； that
an elder sister of his was coming to stay with them； and that she
was expected that evening。 I am not certain whether I found out
then； or afterwards； that； without being actively concerned in any
business； he had some share in； or some annual charge upon the
profits of； a wine…merchant’s house in London； with which his
family had been connected from his great…grandfather’s time； and
in which his sister had a similar interest； but I may mention it in
this place； whether or no。
After dinner； when we were sitting by the fire； and I was
meditating an escape to Peggotty without having the hardihood to
slip away； lest it should offend the master of the house； a coach
drove up to the garden…gate and he went out to receive the visitor。
My mother followed him。 I was timidly following her； when she
turned round at the parlour door； in the dusk； and taking me in
her embrace as she had been used to do； whispered me to love my
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new father and be obedient to him。 She did this hurriedly and
secretly； as if it were wrong； but tenderly； and； putting out her
hand behind her； held mine in it； until we came near to where he
was standing in the garden； where she let mine go； and drew hers
through his arm。
It was Miss Murdstone who was arrived； and a gloomy…looking
lady she was； dark； like her brother； whom she greatly resembled
in face and voice； and with very heavy eyebrows； nearly meeting
over her large nose； as if； being disabled by the wrongs of her sex
from wearing whiskers； she had carried them to that account。 She
brought with her two uncompromising hard black boxes； with her
initials on the lids in hard brass nails。 When she paid the
coachman she took her money out of a hard steel purse； and she
kept the purse in a very jail of a bag which hung upon her arm by
a heavy chain； and shut up like a bite。 I had never； at that time；
seen such a metallic lady altogether as Miss Murdstone was。
She was brought into the parlour with many tokens of welcome；
and there formally recognized my mother as a new and near
relation。 Then she looked at me； and said：
‘Is that your boy； sister…in…law？’
My mother acknowledged me。
‘Generally speaking；’ said Miss Murdstone； ‘I don’t like boys。
How d’ye do； boy？’
Under these encouraging circumstances； I replied that I was
very well； and that I hoped she was the same； with such an
indifferent grace； that Miss Murdstone disposed of me in two
words：
‘Wants manner！’
Having uttered which； with great distinctness； she begged the
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favour of being shown to her room； which became to me from that
time forth a place of awe and dread； wherein the two black boxes
were never seen open or known to be left unlocked； and where （for
I peeped in once or twice when she was out） numerous little steel
fetters and rivets； with which Miss Murdstone embellished herself
when she was dressed； generally hung upon the looking…glass in
formidable array。
As well as I could make out； she had come for good； and had no
intention of ever going again。 She began to ‘help’ my mother next
morning； and was in and out of the store…closet all day； putting
things to rights； and making havoc in the old arrangements。
Almost the first remarkable thing I observed in Miss Murdstone
was； her being constantly haunted by a suspicion that the servants
had a man secreted somewhere on the premises。 Under the
influence of this delusion； she dived into the coal…cellar at the most
untimely hours； and scarcely ever opened the door of a dark
cupboard without clapping it to again； in the belief that she had
got him。
Though there was nothing very airy about Miss Murdstone； she
was a perfect Lark in point of getting up。 She was up （and； as I
believe to this hour； looking for that man） before anybody in the
house was stirring。 Peggotty gave it as her opinion that she even
slept with one eye open； but I could not concur in this idea； for I
tried it myself after hearing the suggestion thrown out； and found
it couldn’t be done。
On the very first morning after her arrival she was up and
ringing her bell at cock…crow。 When my mother came down to
breakfast and was going to make the tea； Miss Murdstone gave her
a kind of peck on the cheek； which was her nearest approach to a
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David Copperfield
kiss； and said：
‘Now； Clara； my dear； I am come here； you know； to relieve you
of all the trouble I can。 You’re much too pretty and thoughtless’—
my mother blushed but laughed； and seemed not to dislike this
character—‘to have any duties imposed upon you that can be
undertaken by me。 If you’ll be so good as give me your keys； my
dear； I’ll attend to all this sort of thing in future。’
From that time； Miss Murdstone kept the keys in her own little
jail all day； and under her pillow all night； and my mother had no
more to do with them than I had。
My mother did not suffer her authority to pass from her without
a shadow of protest。 One night when Miss Murdstone had been
developing certain household plans to
