sketches new and old-第46章

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century；　for　in　our　experience　we　have　never　even　been　able　to　choose　a
dog…pelter　without　celebrating　the　event　with　a　dozen　knockdowns　and　a
general　cramming　of　the　station…house　with　drunken　vagabonds　overnight。
It　is　said　that　when　the　immense　majority　for　Caesar　at　the　polls　in　the
market　was　declared　the　other　day；　and　the　crown　was　offered　to　that
gentleman；　even　his　amazing　unselfishness　in　refusing　it　three　times　was
not　sufficient　to　save　him　from　the　whispered　insults　of　such　men　as
Casca；　of　the　Tenth　Ward；　and　other　hirelings　of　the　disappointed
candidate；　hailing　mostly　from　the　Eleventh　and　Thirteenth　and　other
outside　districts；　who　were　overheard　speaking　ironically　and
contemptuously　of　Mr。　Caesar's　conduct　upon　that　occasion。

We　are　further　informed　that　there　are　many　among　us　who　think　they　are
justified　in　believing　that　the　assassination　of　Julius　Caesar　was　a　put…
up　thinga　cut…and…dried　arrangement；　hatched　by　Marcus　Brutus　and　a　lot
of　his　hired　roughs；　and　carried　out　only　too　faithfully　according　to　the
program。　　Whether　there　be　good　grounds　for　this　suspicion　or　not；　we
leave　to　the　people　to　judge　for　themselves；　only　asking　that　they　will
read　the　following　account　of　the　sad　occurrence　carefully　and
dispassionately　before　they　render　that　judgment。

The　Senate　was　already　in　session；　and　Caesar　was　coming　down　the　street
toward　the　capitol；　conversing　with　some　personal　friends；　and　followed；
as　usual；　by　a　large　number　of　citizens。　　Just　as　he　was　passing　in　front
of　Demosthenes　and　Thucydides'　drug　store；　he　was　observing　casually　to　a
gentleman；　who；　our　informant　thinks；　is　a　fortune…teller；　that　the　Ides
of　March　were　come。　　The　reply　was；　〃Yes；　they　are　come；　but　not　gone
yet。〃　　At　this　moment　Artemidorus　stepped　up　and　passed　the　time　of　day；
and　asked　Caesar　to　read　a　schedule　or　a　tract　or　something　of　the　kind；
which　he　had　brought　for　his　perusal。　　Mr。　Decius　Brutus　also　said
something　about　an　〃humble　suit〃　which　he　wanted　read。　　Artexnidorus
begged　that　attention　might　be　paid　to　his　first；　because　it　was　of
personal　consequence　to　Caesar。　　The　latter　replied　that　what　concerned
himself　should　be　read　last；　or　words　to　that　effect。　　Artemidorus　begged
and　beseeched　him　to　read　the　paper　instantly！　＇Mark　that：　It　is　hinted
by　William　Shakespeare；　who　saw　the　beginning　and　the　end　of　the
unfortunate　affray；　that　this　〃schedule〃　was　simply　a　note　discovering　to
Caesar　that　a　plot　was　brewing　to　take　his　life。＇　　However；　Caesar
shook　him　off；　and　refused　to　read　any　petition　in　the　street。　　He　then
entered　the　capitol；　and　the　crowd　followed　him。

About　this　time　the　following　conversation　was　overheard；　and　we　consider
that；　taken　in　connection　with　the　events　which　succeeded　it；　it　bears　an
appalling　significance：　　Mr。　Papilius　Lena　remarked　to　George　W。　Cassias
（commonly　known　as　the　〃Nobby　Boy　of　the　Third　Ward〃）；　a　bruiser　in　the
pay　of　the　Opposition；　that　he　hoped　his　enterprise　to…day　might　thrive；
and　when　Cassias　asked　〃What　enterprise？〃　he　only　closed　his　left　eye
temporarily　and　said　with　simulated　indifference；　〃Fare　you　well；〃　and
sauntered　toward　Caesar。　　Marcus　Brutus；　who　is　suspected　of　being　the
ringleader　of　the　band　that　killed　Caesar；　asked　what　it　was　that　Lena
had　said。　　Cassias　told　him；　and　added　in　a　low　tone；　〃I　fear　our　purpose
is　discovered。〃

Brutus　told　his　wretched　accomplice　to　keep　an　eye　on　Lena；　and　a　moment
after　Cassias　urged　that　lean　and　hungry　vagrant；　Casca；　whose　reputation
here　is　none　of　the　best；　to　be　sudden；　for　he　feared　prevention。　　He
then　turned　to　Brutus；　apparently　much　excited；　and　asked　what　should　be
done；　and　swore　that　either　he　or　Caesar　would　never　turn　backhe　would
kill　himself　first。　　At　this　time　Caesar　was　talking　to　some　of　the　back…
country　members　about　the　approaching　fall　elections；　and　paying　little
attention　to　what　was　going　on　around　him。　　Billy　Trebonius　got　into
conversation　with　the　people's　friend　and　Caesar'sMark　Antonyand
under　some　pretense　or　other　got　him　away；　and　Brutus；　Decius；　Casca；
Cinna；　Metellus　Cimber；　and　others　of　the　gang　of　infamous　desperadoes
that　infest　Rome　at　present；　closed　around　the　doomed　Caesar。　　Then
Metellus　Cimber　knelt　down　and　begged　that　his　brother　might　be　recalled
from　banishment；　but　Caesar　rebuked　him　for　his　fawning　conduct；　and
refused　to　grant　his　petition。　　Immediately；　at　Cimber's　request；　first
Brutus　and　then　Cassias　begged　for　the　return　of　the　banished　Publius；
but　Caesar　still　refused。　　He　said　he　could　not　be　moved；　that　he　was　as
fixed　as　the　North　Star；　and　proceeded　to　speak　in　the　most　complimentary
terms　of　the　firmness　of　that　star　and　its　steady　character。　　Then　he
said　he　was　like　it；　and　he　believed　he　was　the　only　man　in　the　country
that　was；　therefore；　since　he　was　〃constant〃　that　Cimber　should　be
banished；　he　was　also　〃constant〃　that　he　should　stay　banished；　and　he'd
be　hanged　if　he　didn't　keep　him　so！

Instantly　seizing　upon　this　shallow　pretext　for　a　fight；　Casca　sprang　at
Caesar　and　struck　him　with　a　dirk；　Caesar　grabbing　him　by　the　arm　with
his　right　hand；　and　launching　a　blow　straight　from　the　shoulder　with　his
left；　that　sent　the　reptile　bleeding　to　the　earth。　　He　then　backed　up
against　Pompey's　statue；　and　squared　himself　to　receive　his　assailants。
Cassias　and　Cimber　and　Cinna　rushed；　upon　him　with　their　daggers　drawn；
and　the　former　succeeded　in　inflicting　a　wound　upon　his　body；　but　before
he　could　strike　again；　and　before　either　of　the　others　could　strike　at
all；　Caesar　stretched　the　three　miscreants　at　his　feet　with　as　many　blows
of　his　powerful　fist。　　By　this　time　the　Senate　was　in　an　indescribable
uproar；　the　throng　of　citizens　is　the　lobbies　had　blockaded　the　doors　in
their　frantic　efforts　to　escape　from　the　building；　the　sergeant…at…arms
and　his　assistants　were　struggling　with　the　assassins；　venerable　senators
had　cast　aside　their　encumbering　robes；　and　were　leaping　over　benches　and
flying　down　the　aisles　in　wild　confusion　toward　the　shelter　of　the
committee…rooms；　and　a　thousand　voices　were　shouting　〃Po…lice！　　Po…lice！〃
in　discordant　tones　that　rose　above　the　frightful　din　like　shrieking
winds　above　the　roaring　of　a　tempest。　　And　amid　it　all　great　Caesar　stood
with　his　back　against　the　statue；　like　a　lion　at　bay；　and　fought　his
assailants　weaponless　and　hand　to　hand；　with　the　defiant　bearing　and　the
unwavering　courage　which　he　had　shown　before　on　many　a　bloody　field。
Billy　Trebonius　and　Caius　Legarius　struck　him　with　their　daggers　and
fell；　as　their　brother…conspirators　before　them　had　fallen。　　But　at　last；
when　Caesar　saw　his　old　friend　Brutus　step　forward　armed　with　a　murderous
knife；　it　is　said　he　seemed　utterly　overpowered　with　grief　and　amazement；
and；　dropping　his　invincible　left　arm　by　his　side；　he　hid　his　face　in　the
folds　of　his　mantle　and　received　the　treacherous　blow　without　an　effort
to　stay　the　hand　that　gave　it。　　He　only　said；　〃Et　tu；　Brute？〃　and　fell
lifeless　on　the　marble　pavement。

We　learn　that　the　coat　deceased　had　on　when　he　was　killed　was　the　same
one　he　wore　in　his　tent　on　the　afternoon　of　the　day　he　overcame　the
Nervii；　and　that　when　it　was　removed　from　the　corpse　it　was　found　to　be
cut　and　gashed　in　no　less　than　seven　different　places。　　There　was　nothing
in　the　pockets。　　It　will　be　exhibited　at　the　coroner's　inquest；　and　will
be　damning　proof　of　the　fact　of　the　killing。　　These　latter　facts　may　be
relied　on；　as　we　get　them　from　Mark　Antony；　whose　position　enables　him　to
learn　every　item　of　news　connected　with　the　one　subject　of　absorbing
interest　of…to…day。

LATER：　While　the　coroner　was　summoning　a　jury；　Mark　Antony　and　other
friends　of　the　late　Caesar　got　hold　of　the　body；　and　lugged　it　off　to　the
Forum；　and　at　last　accounts　Antony　and　Brutus　were　making　speeches　over
it　and　raising　such　a　row　among　the　people　that；　as　we　go　to　press；　the
chief　of　police　is　satisfied　there　is　going　to　be　a　riot；　and　is　taking
measures　accordingly。






THE　WIDOW'S　PROTEST

One　of　the　saddest　things　that　ever　came　under　my　notice　（said　the
banker's　clerk）　was　there　in　Corning　during　the　war。　　Dan　Murphy　enlisted
as　a　private；　and　fought　very　bravely。　　The　boys　all　liked　him；　and　when
a　wound　by　and　by　weakened　him　down　till　carrying　a　musket　was　too　heavy
work　for　him；　they　clubbed　together　and　fixed　him　up　as　a　sutler。　　He
made　money　then；　and　sent　it　always　to　his　wife　to　bank　for　him。　　She　was
a　washer　and　ironer；　and　knew　enough　by　hard　experience　to　keep　money
when　she　got　it。　　She　didn't　waste　a　penny。

On　the　contrary；　she　began　to　get　miserly　as　her　bank…account　grew。　　She
grieved　to　part　with　a　cent；　poor　creature；　for　twice　in　her　hard…working
life　she　had　known　what　it　was　to　be　hungry；　cold；　friendless；　sick；　and
without　a　dollar　in　the　world；　and　she　had　a　haunting　dread　of　suffering
so　again。　　Well；　at　last　Dan　died；　and　the　boys；　in　testimony　of　their
esteem　and　respect　for　him；　telegraphed　to　Mrs。　Murphy　to　know　if　she
would　like　to　have　him　embalmed　and　sent　home；　when　you　know　the　usual
custom　was　to　dump　a　poor　devil　like　him　into　a　shallow　hole；　and　then
inform　his　friends　what　had　become　of　him。　　Mrs。　　Murphy　jumped　to　the
conclusion　that　it　would　only　cost　two　or　three　dollars　to　embalm　her
dead　husband；　and　so　she　telegraphed　〃Yes。〃　　It　was　at　the　〃wake〃　that
the　bill　for　embalming　arrived　and　was　presented　to　the　widow。

She　uttered　a　wild；　sad　wail　that　pierced　every　heart；　and　said；
〃Sivinty…foive　dollars　for　stooffin'　Dan；　blister　their　sowls！　　Did　thim
divils　suppose　I　was　goin'　to　stairt　a　Museim；　that　I'd　be　dalin'　in　such
expinsive　curiassities　！〃

The　banker's　clerk　said　there　was　not　a　dry　eye　in　the　house。






THE　SCRIPTURAL　PANORAMIST　＇Written　about　1866。＇

There　was　a　fellow　traveling　around　in　that　country；〃　said　Mr。
Nickerson；　〃with　a　moral…religious　showa　sort　of　scriptural　panorama
and　he　hired　a　wooden…headed　old　slab　to　play　the　piano　for　him。　　After
the　first　night's　performance　the　showman　says：

〃'My　friend；　you　seem　to　know　pretty　much　all　the　tunes　there　are；　and
you　worry　along　first　rate。　　But　then；　didn't　you　notice　that　sometimes
last　night　the　piece　you　happened　to　be　playing　was　a　little　rough　on　the
proprieties；　so　to　speakdidn't　seem　to　jibe　with　the　general　gait　of
the　picture　that　was　passing　at　the　time；　as　it　werewas　a　little
foreign　to　the　subject；　you　knowas　if　you　didn't　either　trump　or　follow
suit；　you　understand？'

〃'Well；　no；'　the　fellow　said；　'he　hadn't　noticed；　but　it　might　be；　he　had
played　along　just　as　it　came　handy。'

〃So　they　put　it　up　that　the　simple　old　dummy　was　to　keep　his　eye　on　the
panorama　after　that；　and　as　soon　as　a　stunning　picture　was　reeled　out　he
was　to　fit　it　to　a　dot　with　a　piece　of　music　that　would　help　the　audience
to　get　the　idea　of　the　subject；　and　warm　them　up　like　a　camp…meeting
revival。　　That　sort　of　thing　would　corral　their　sympathies；　the　showman
said。

〃There　was　a　big　audience　that　night…mostly　middle…aged　and　old　people
who　belong　to　the　church；　and　took　a　strong　interest　in　Bible　matters；
and　the　balance　were　pretty　much　young　bucks　and　heifersthey　always