jeremy-第26章

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and　pinched　her　stocking。　A　battle　followed；　too　commonplace　in　its
details　to　demand　description　here。　It　need　only　be　said　that　Hamlet
joined　in　it　and　ran　away　with　Helen's　letter　which　had　blown　to　the
ground　during　the　struggle；　and　that　he　ate　it；　in　his　corner；　with
great　satisfaction。　Then；　when　they　were　at　their　angriest；　Helen
suddenly　began　to　laugh　which　she　did　sometimes；　to　her　own　intense
annoyance；　when　she　terribly　wanted　to　be　enraged；　then　Jeremy
laughed　too；　and　Hamlet　yielded　up　fragments　of　the　letterso　that
all　was　well。

But　the　problem　of　the　box　was　not　solvedand；　in　the　end；　the　only
part　of　the　toy　village　that　Mrs。　Monk　ever　saw　was　the　youngest
Miss　Noah　and　one　apple…tree　for　her　to　sit　under。




II


The　ritual　of　the　journey　to　Cow　Farm　was；　by　this　time；　of　course；
firmly　established；　and　the　first　part　of　the　ritual　was　that　one
should　wake　up　at　three　in　the　morning。　This　year；　however；　for　some
strange　mysterious　reason　Jeremy　overslept　himself　and　did　not　wake
up　until　eight　o'clock；　to　find　then　that　everyone　was　already　busy
packing　and　brushing　and　rushing　about；　and　that　all　his　own　most
sacred　preparations　must　be　squeezed　into　no　time　at　all　if　he　were
to　be　ready。　Old　Tom　Collins's　bus　came　along　at　twelve　o'clock　to
catch　the　one　o'clock　train；　so　that　Jeremy　might　he　considered　to
have　the　whole　morning　for　his　labours；　but　that　was　not　going　to　be
enough　for　him　unless　he　was　very　careful。　Grown…up　people　had　such
a　way　of　suddenly　catching　on　to　you　and　washing　your　ears；　or
making　you　brush　your　teeth；　or　sitting　you　down　in　a　corner　with　a
book；　that　circumnavigating　them　and　outplotting　them　needed　as　much
nerve　and　enterprise　as　tracking　Red　Indians。　When　things　were　fined
down　to　the　most　naked　accuracy　he　had　apparently　only　two　〃jobs〃：
one　to　accustom　Hamlet　to　walking　with　a　〃lead；〃　the　other　to　close
the　green　box；　but　of　course　Mary　would　want　advice；　and　there
would；　in　all　probability；　be　a　dispute　or　two　about　property　that
would　take　up　the　time。

It　was　indeed　an　eventful　morning。　Trouble　began　with　Mary　suddenly
discovering　that　she　had　lost　her　copy　of　〃Alice　in　Wonderland〃　and
rushing　to　Jeremy's　box　and　upsetting　all　Jeremy's　things　to　see
whether　it　were　there。　Jeremy　objected　to　this　with　an　indignation
that　was　scarcely　in　the　sequel　justified；　because　Mary　found　the
book　jammed　against　the　paint…box　and　a　dry　walnut　nestling　in　its
centre。　She　cried　and　protested　and　then　suddenly；　with　the
disgusting　sentimentality　that　was　so　characteristic　of　her；
abandoned　her　position　altogether　and　said　that　Jeremy　could　have
it；　and　then　cried　again　because　he　said　he　didn't　want　it。

Then　Jeremy　had　to　put　everything　back　into　the　box　again；　and　in
the　middle　of　this　Hamlet　ran　off　with　the　red…checked　Miss　Noah
between　his　teeth　and　began　to　lick　the　blue　off　her　dress；　looking
up　at　the　assembled　company　between　every　lick　with　a　smile　of　the
loveliest　satisfaction。　Then；　when　the　box　was　almost　closed；　it　was
discovered　by　a　shocked　and　virtuous　Helen　that　Jeremy　had　left　out
his　Bible。

〃There'll　be　one　there；〃　said　Jeremy　in　an　angry　agitated　whisper；
hoping　to　escape　the　attention　of　Miss　Jones。

〃What's　that；　Jeremy　dear？〃　said　Miss　Jones。

〃Oh；　fancy；　Miss　Jones！〃　said　Helen。　〃He's　taking　all　his　dirty　old
toys　and　even　his　old　clown；　and　he's　leaving　out　his　Bible。〃

〃I'm　not！〃　cried　Jeremy；　taking　it　and　trying　to　squeeze　it　down
between　three　walnuts　and　the　toy　pistol。

〃Oh；　Jeremy　clear；　that's　not　the　way　to　treat　your　Bible。　I'll　give
you　some　paper　to　wrap　it　up　in；　and　you'd　better　take　the　things
out　again　and　put　it　in　at　the　bottom　of　the　box。〃　Yes；　obviously　he
would　not　be　ready　in　time。

The　matter　of　Hamlet　and　the　〃lead〃　was　also　very　exhausting。　Hamlet
had　never；　in　all　his　days；　been　tied　to　anyone　or　anything。　Of
course　no　one　could　tell　what　had　been　his　history　before　he　came
strolling　on　to　the　Cole　horizon；　and　it　may　be　that　once　as　a　very
small　puppy　he　had　been　tied　on　to　something。　On　the　whole；　that　is
probable；　his　protests　on　this　occasion　being　of　a　kind　so　vehement
as　to　argue　some　reminiscences　behind　them。　Mrs。　Cole　had　bought　a
beautiful　〃lead〃　of　black　leather；　of　course　be　had　already　a　collar
studded　with　little　silver　nails；　and　the　point　was　very　simply　to
fasten　the　〃lead〃　on　to　the　collar。　Jeremy　had　been　promised　that　he
should　conduct　Hamlet；　and　it　had　seemed；　when　the　promise　had　been
made；　as　though　it　would　be　a　very　simple　thing　to　carry　out。　Hamlet
no　sooner　saw　the　cord　than　he　began　his　ingenious　protests；　sitting
up　and　smiing　at　it；　suddenly　darting　at　the　recumbent　Miss　Noah　and
rushing　round　the　room　with　her；　finally　catching　the　〃lead〃　itself
in　his　teeth　and　hiding　with　it　under　Miss　Jones's　skirt。

The　result　was　that　Tom　Collins's　bus　arrived　when　no　one　in　the
schoolroom　was　in　the　least　prepared　for　it。　Then　what　confusion
there　was！　Mrs。　Cole；　looking　strange　in　her　hat　and　veil；　as　though
she　were　dressed　up　for　a　play；　came　urging　them　to　hurry；　〃because
Father　was　waiting。〃　Then　Hamlet　tied　himself　and　his　〃lead〃　round
the　leg　of　the　table；　then　Mary　said　in　her　most　tiresome　manner；
apropos　of　nothing　at　all；　〃You　do　love　me；　Jeremy；　don't　you？〃　just
at　the　moment　when　he　was　trying　to　unlace　Hamlet；　and　her　lip　began
to　tremble　when　he　said；　〃Oh；　don't　bother；〃　so　that　he　was
compelled　to　add　〃Of　course　I　do〃；　then　Father　came　running　up　the
stairs　with　〃Really；　this　is　too　disgraceful。　We　shall　miss　that
train！〃

Then　Uncle　Samuel　appeared；　looking　so　queer　that　Jeremy　was
compelled　to　stare　at　him。　Jeremy　had　seen　very　little　of　Uncle
Samuel　during　these　last　months。　He　had　hoped；　after　that　wonderful
adventure　of　the　Christmas　Pantomime；　that　they　were　going　to　be
friends；　but　it　had　not　been　so。　He　had　been　away　somewhere；　in　some
strange　place；　painting；　and　then；　on　his　return；　he　had　hid　himself
and　his　odd　affairs　away　in　some　corner　of　the　house　where　no　one
saw　him。　He　had　had　his　life　and　Jeremy　had　had　his。

Nevertheless　Jeremy　was　delighted　to　see　him。　It　would　be　fun　to
have　him　at　Cow　Farm　with　his　squashy　brown　hat；　his　fat　cheeks；　his
blue　painting　smock；　and　his　short　legs　with　huge　boots。　He　was
different；　in　some　way；　from　all　the　rest　of　the　world；　and　Jeremy；
even　at　that　early　stage　of　his　education；　already　perceived　that　he
could　learn　more　from　Uncle　Samuel　than　from　any　other　member　of　the
family。

Now　he　put　his　head　in　through　the　door　and　said：　〃Well；　you　kids；
aren't　you　ready？　It's　time！〃　Then；　seeing　Miss　Jones；　he　said：
〃Good　morning；〃　and　bolted　like　a　rabbit。　Even　then　Jeremy　noticed
that　he　had　paint　on　his　fingers；　and　that　two　of　his　waistcoat
buttons　were　unfastened。

Then　down　in　the　hall　what　confusion　there　was！　Boxes　here；　there
and　everywhere。　Mother；　Father；　Aunt　Amy；　Uncle　Samuel；　and；　most
interesting　of　all；　Barbara　and　the　new　nurse。　The　new　nurse　was
called　Mrs。　Pateham；　and　she　was　stout；　red…cheeked；　and　smiling。
The　bundle　in　white　called　Barbara　was；　most　happily；　sleeping；　but
Hamlet　barked　at　Mrs。　Pateham；　and　that　woke　Barbara；　who　began　to
cry。　Then　Collins　came　in　with　his　coat　off；　and　the　muscles
swelling　on　his　shoulders；　and　handled　the　boxes　as　though　they　were
paper；　and　the　cook；　and　Rose；　and　William；　the　handy…boy；　and　old
Jordan；　the　gardener；　and　Mrs。　Preston；　a　lady　from　two　doors　down；
who　sometimes　came　in　to　help；　all　began　to　bob　and　smile；　and
Father　said：　〃Now；　my　dear。　Now；　my　dear；〃　and　Hamlet　wound　himself
and　his　lead　round　everything　that　he　could　see；　and　Helen　fussed
and　said：　〃Now；　Jeremy；〃　and　Miss　Jones　said：　〃Now；　children；〃　and
last　of　all　Collins　said：　〃Now；　mum；　now；　sir；〃　and　then　they　all
were　bundled　into　the　bus；　with　the　cart　and　the　luggage　coming
along　behind。

The　drive　through　the　streets　was；　of　course；　as　lovely　as　it　could
be；　not　in　the　least　because　anyone　could　see　anythingthat　was
hindered　by　the　fact　that　the　windows　of　the　bus　were　so　old　that
they　were　crusted　with　a　kind　of　glassy　mildew；　and　no　amount　of
rubbing　on　the　window…　panes　provided　one　with　a　viewbut　because
the　inside　of　the　bus　was　inevitably　connected　with　adventure
partly　through　its　motion；　partly　through　its　noise；　and　partly
through　its　lovely　smell。　These　were；　of　course；　Jeremy's　views；　and
it　can't　definitely　be　asserted　that　all　grown…up　people　shared
them。　But　whenever　Jeremy　had　ridden　in　that　bus　he　had　always　been
on　his　way　to　something　delightful。　The　motion；　therefore；　rejoiced
his　heart；　although　the　violence　of　it　was　such　that　everyone　was
thrown　against　everyone　else；　so　that　Uncle　Samuel　was　suddenly
hurled　against　the　bonnet　of　Miss　Jones；　and　Helen　struck　Aunt　Amy
in　the　chest；　and　Jeremy　himself　dived　into　his　sister　Barbara。　As
to　the　smell；　it　was　that　lovely　well…known　one　that　has　in　it　mice
and　straw；　wet　umbrellas　and　whisky；　goloshes　and　candle…grease；
dust　and　green　paint！　Jeremy　loved　it；　and　sniffed　on　this　occasion
so　often　that　Miss　Jones　told　him　to　blow　his　nose。　As　to　the　noise；
who　is　there　who　does　not　remember　that　rattle　and　clatter；　that
sudden；　deafening　report　as　of　the　firing　of　a　hundred　firearms；　the
sudden　pause　when　every　bolt　and　bar　and　hinge　sighs　and　moans　like
the　wind　or　a　stormy　sea；　and　then　that　sudden　scream　of　the
clattering　windows；　when　it　is　as　though　a　frenzied　cook；　having
received　notice　to　leave；　was　breaking　every　scrap　of　china　in　the
kitchen？　〃Who　does　not　know　that　last　maddened　roar　as　the　vehicle
stumbles　across　the　last　piece　of　cobbled　roada　roar　that　drowns；
with　a　savage　and　determined　triumph；　all　those　last　directions　not
to　forget　this；　that；　and　the　other；　all　those　inquiries　as　to
whether　this；　that；　and　the　other　had　been　remembered？　Cobbles　are
gone　now；　and　old　buses　sleep　in　deserted　courts；　and　Collins；　alas；
is　not。　His　youngest　son　has　a　motor…garage；　and　Polchester　has
asphaltsic　transit　gloria；　mundi。

Jeremy；　clutching　his　green　box　with　one　hand　and　Hamlet's　lead　with
the　other；　was　in　an　ecstasy　of　happiness。　The　louder　the　noise；　the
rocking　motion；　the　stronger　the　smell；　the　better。　〃Isn't　it
lovely？〃　he　murmured　to　Miss　Jones　during　one　of　the　pauses。

It　may　be　that　it　was　at　this　moment　that　Uncle　Samuel　finally　made
up　his　mind　about　Jeremy。　In　spite　of　his　dislike；　even　hatred　of
children；　he　had　been　coming　slowly；　during　the　last　two　years；　to
an　affection　for；　and　interest　in；　his　nephew　that　was　something
quite　new　to　his　cynical；　egoistic　nature。　It　had　leapt　into
activity　at　Christmas　time；　then　had　died　again。　Now　as；　flung　first
into　his　sister's　bony　arms；　then　on　to　the　terrified　spectacles　of
his　niece　Mary；　he　tried　to　recover　himself；　he　was　caught　and　held
by　that　picture　of　his　small　nephew；　seated；　solid　and　square；　in
his　blue　sailor　suit；　his　bare　knees　swinging；　his　hand　clutching
his　precious　box　with　an　energy　that　defied　Fate　itself　to　take　it
from　him；　his　mouth　set；　his　eyes　staring；　radiant　with　joy；　in
front　of　him。

On　arrival　at　the　station　it　was　found　that　the　one　o'clock　to
Liskane　was　〃just　about　due；〃