she stoops to conquer-第8章

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MARLOW。　　Yes；　as　merry　as　cards；　supper；　wine；　and　old　women　can　make　us。

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　And　their　agreeable　Rattle；　ha！　ha！　ha！

MARLOW。　　（Aside。）　　Egad！　I　don't　quite　like　this　chit。　　She　looks　knowing；　methinks。　　You　laugh；　child？

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　I　can't　but　laugh；　to　think　what　time　they　all　have　for　minding　their　work　or　their　family。

MARLOW。　　（Aside。）　　All's　well；　she　don't　laugh　at　me。　　（To　her。）　　Do　you　ever　work；　child？

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　Ay；　sure。　　There's　not　a　screen　or　quilt　in　the　whole　house　but　what　can　bear　witness　to　that。

MARLOW。　　Odso！　then　you　must　show　me　your　embroidery。　　I　embroider　and　draw　patterns　myself　a　little。　　If　you　want　a　judge　of　your　work；　you　must　apply　to　me。　　（Seizing　her　hand。）

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　Ay；　but　the　colours　do　not　look　well　by　candlelight。　　You　shall　see　all　in　the　morning。　　（Struggling。）

MARLOW。　　And　why　not　now；　my　angel？　　Such　beauty　fires　beyond　the　power　of　resistance。Pshaw！　the　father　here！　　My　old　luck：　I　never　nicked　seven　that　I　did　not　throw　ames　ace　three　times　following。　　＇Exit　MARLOW。＇


Enter　HARDCASTLE；　who　stands　in　surprise。


HARDCASTLE。　　So；　madam。　　So；　I　find　THIS　is　your　MODEST　lover。　　This　is　your　humble　admirer；　that　kept　his　eyes　fixed　on　the　ground；　and　only　adored　at　humble　distance。　　Kate；　Kate；　art　thou　not　ashamed　to　deceive　your　father　so？

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　Never　trust　me；　dear　papa；　but　he's　still　the　modest　man　I　first　took　him　for；　you'll　be　convinced　of　it　as　well　as　I。

HARDCASTLE。　　By　the　hand　of　my　body；　I　believe　his　impudence　is　infectious！　　Didn't　I　see　him　seize　your　hand？　　Didn't　I　see　him　haul　you　about　like　a　milkmaid？　　And　now　you　talk　of　his　respect　and　his　modesty；　forsooth！

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　But　if　I　shortly　convince　you　of　his　modesty；　that　he　has　only　the　faults　that　will　pass　off　with　time；　and　the　virtues　that　will　improve　with　age；　I　hope　you'll　forgive　him。

HARDCASTLE。　　The　girl　would　actually　make　one　run　mad！　　I　tell　you；　I'll　not　be　convinced。　　I　am　convinced。　　He　has　scarce　been　three　hours　in　the　house；　and　he　has　already　encroached　on　all　my　prerogatives。　　You　may　like　his　impudence；　and　call　it　modesty；　but　my　son…in…law；　madam；　must　have　very　different　qualifications。

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　Sir；　I　ask　but　this　night　to　convince　you。

HARDCASTLE。　　You　shall　not　have　half　the　time；　for　I　have　thoughts　of　turning　him　out　this　very　hour。

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　Give　me　that　hour　then；　and　I　hope　to　satisfy　you。

HARDCASTLE。　　Well；　an　hour　let　it　be　then。　　But　I'll　have　no　trifling　with　your　father。　　All　fair　and　open；　do　you　mind　me。

MISS　HARDCASTLE。　　I　hope；　sir；　you　have　ever　found　that　I　considered　your　commands　as　my　pride；　for　your　kindness　is　such；　that　my　duty　as　yet　has　been　inclination。　　＇Exeunt。＇



ACT　THE　FOURTH。


Enter　HASTINGS　and　MISS　NEVILLE。


HASTINGS。　　You　surprise　me；　Sir　Charles　Marlow　expected　here　this　night！　　Where　have　you　had　your　information？

MISS　NEVILLE。　　You　may　depend　upon　it。　　I　just　saw　his　letter　to　Mr。　Hardcastle；　in　which　he　tells　him　he　intends　setting　out　a　few　hours　after　his　son。

HASTINGS。　　Then；　my　Constance；　all　must　be　completed　before　he　arrives。　　He　knows　me；　and　should　he　find　me　here；　would　discover　my　name；　and　perhaps　my　designs；　to　the　rest　of　the　family。

MISS　NEVILLE。　　The　jewels；　I　hope；　are　safe？

HASTINGS。　　Yes；　yes；　I　have　sent　them　to　Marlow；　who　keeps　the　keys　of　our　baggage。　　In　the　mean　time；　I'll　go　to　prepare　matters　for　our　elopement。　　I　have　had　the　'squire's　promise　of　a　fresh　pair　of　horses；　and　if　I　should　not　see　him　again；　will　write　him　further　directions。　　＇Exit。＇

MISS　NEVILLE。　　Well！　success　attend　you。　　In　the　mean　time　I'll　go　and　amuse　my　aunt　with　the　old　pretence　of　a　violent　passion　for　my　cousin。　　＇Exit。＇


Enter　MARLOW；　followed　by　a　Servant。


MARLOW。　　I　wonder　what　Hastings　could　mean　by　sending　me　so　valuable　a　thing　as　a　casket　to　keep　for　him；　when　he　knows　the　only　place　I　have　is　the　seat　of　a　post…coach　at　an　inn…door。　　Have　you　deposited　the　casket　with　the　landlady；　as　I　ordered　you？　　Have　you　put　it　into　her　own　hands？

SERVANT。　　Yes；　your　honour。

MARLOW。　　She　said　she'd　keep　it　safe；　did　she？

SERVANT。　　Yes；　she　said　she'd　keep　it　safe　enough；　she　asked　me　how　I　came　by　it；　and　she　said　she　had　a　great　mind　to　make　me　give　an　account　of　myself。　　＇Exit　Servant。＇

MARLOW。　　Ha！　ha！　ha！　　They're　safe；　however。　　What　an　unaccountable　set　of　beings　have　we　got　amongst！　　This　little　bar…maid　though　runs　in　my　head　most　strangely；　and　drives　out　the　absurdities　of　all　the　rest　of　the　family。　　She's　mine；　she　must　be　mine；　or　I'm　greatly　mistaken。


Enter　HASTINGS。


HASTINGS。　　Bless　me！　　I　quite　forgot　to　tell　her　that　I　intended　to　prepare　at　the　bottom　of　the　garden。　　Marlow　here；　and　in　spirits　too！

MARLOW。　　Give　me　joy；　George！　　Crown　me；　shadow　me　with　laurels！　　Well；　George；　after　all；　we　modest　fellows　don't　want　for　success　among　the　women。

HASTINGS。　　Some　women；　you　mean。　　But　what　success　has　your　honour's　modesty　been　crowned　with　now；　that　it　grows　so　insolent　upon　us？

MARLOW。　　Didn't　you　see　the　tempting；　brisk；　lovely　little　thing；　that　runs　about　the　house　with　a　bunch　of　keys　to　its　girdle？

HASTINGS。　　Well；　and　what　then？

MARLOW。　　She's　mine；　you　rogue　you。　　Such　fire；　such　motion；　such　eyes；　such　lips；　but；　egad！　she　would　not　let　me　kiss　them　though。

HASTINGS。　　But　are　you　so　sure；　so　very　sure　of　her？

MARLOW。　　Why；　man；　she　talked　of　showing　me　her　work　above　stairs；　and　I　am　to　improve　the　pattern。

HASTINGS。　　But　how　can　you；　Charles；　go　about　to　rob　a　woman　of　her　honour？

MARLOW。　　Pshaw！　pshaw！　　We　all　know　the　honour　of　the　bar…maid　of　an　inn。　　I　don't　intend　to　rob　her；　take　my　word　for　it；　there's　nothing　in　this　house　I　shan't　honestly　pay　for。

HASTINGS。　　I　believe　the　girl　has　virtue。

MARLOW。　　And　if　she　has；　I　should　be　the　last　man　in　the　world　that　would　attempt　to　corrupt　it。

HASTINGS。　　You　have　taken　care；　I　hope；　of　the　casket　I　sent　you　to　lock　up？　　Is　it　in　safety？

MARLOW。　　Yes；　yes。　　It's　safe　enough。　　I　have　taken　care　of　it。　　But　how　could　you　think　the　seat　of　a　post…coach　at　an　inn…door　a　place　of　safety？　　Ah！　numskull！　　I　have　taken　better　precautions　for　you　than　you　did　for　yourselfI　have

HASTINGS。　　What？

MARLOW。　　I　have　sent　it　to　the　landlady　to　keep　for　you。

HASTINGS。　　To　the　landlady！

MARLOW。　　The　landlady。

HASTINGS。　　You　did？

MARLOW。　　I　did。　　She's　to　be　answerable　for　its　forthcoming；　you　know。

HASTINGS。　　Yes；　she'll　bring　it　forth　with　a　witness。

MARLOW。　　Wasn't　I　right？　　I　believe　you'll　allow　that　I　acted　prudently　upon　this　occasion。

HASTINGS。　　（Aside。）　　He　must　not　see　my　uneasiness。

MARLOW。　　You　seem　a　little　disconcerted　though；　methinks。　　Sure　nothing　has　happened？

HASTINGS。　　No；　nothing。　　Never　was　in　better　spirits　in　all　my　life。　　And　so　you　left　it　with　the　landlady；　who；　no　doubt；　very　readily　undertook　the　charge。

MARLOW。　　Rather　too　readily。　　For　she　not　only　kept　the　casket；　but；　through　her　great　precaution；　was　going　to　keep　the　messenger　too。　　Ha！　ha！　ha！

HASTINGS。　　He！　he！　he！　　They're　safe；　however。

MARLOW。　　As　a　guinea　in　a　miser's　purse。

HASTINGS。　　（Aside。）　　So　now　all　hopes　of　fortune　are　at　an　end；　and　we　must　set　off　without　it。　　（To　him。）　　Well；　Charles；　I'll　leave　you　to　your　meditations　on　the　pretty　bar…maid；　and；　he！　he！　he！　may　you　be　as　successful　for　yourself；　as　you　have　been　for　me！　　＇Exit。＇

MARLOW。　　Thank　ye；　George：　I　ask　no　more。　　Ha！　ha！　ha！


Enter　HARDCASTLE。


HARDCASTLE。　　I　no　longer　know　my　own　house。　　It's　turned　all　topsy…turvy。　　His　servants　have　got　drunk　already。　　I'll　bear　it　no　longer；　and　yet；　from　my　respect　for　his　father；　I'll　be　calm。　　（To　him。）　　Mr。　Marlow；　your　servant。　　I'm　your　very　humble　servant。　　（Bowing　low。）

MARLOW。　　Sir；　your　humble　servant。　　（Aside。）　　What's　to　be　the　wonder　now？

HARDCASTLE。　　I　believe；　sir；　you　must　be　sensible；　sir；　that　no　man　alive　ought　to　be　more　welcome　than　your　father's　son；　sir。　　I　hope　you　think　so？

MARLOW。　　I　do　from　my　soul；　sir。　　I　don't　want　much　entreaty。　　I　generally　make　my　father's　son　welcome　wherever　he　goes。

HARDCASTLE。　　I　believe　you　do；　from　my　soul；　sir。　　But　though　I　say　nothing　to　your　own　conduct；　that　of　your　servants　is　insufferable。　　Their　manner　of　drinking　is　setting　a　very　bad　example　in　this　house；　　I　assure　you。

MARLOW。　　I　protest；　my　very　good　sir；　that　is　no　fault　of　mine。　　If　they　don't　drink　as　they　ought；　they　are　to　blame。　　I　ordered　them　not　to　spare　the　cellar。　　I　did；　I　assure　you。　　（To　the　side　scene。）　　Here；　let　one　of　my　servants　come　up。　　（To　him。）　　My　positive　directions　were；　that　as　I　did　not　drink　myself；　they　should　make　up　for　my　deficiencies　below。

HARDCASTLE。　　Then　they　had　your　orders　for　what　they　do？　　I'm　satisfied！

MARLOW。　　They　had；　I　assure　you。　　You　shall　hear　from　one　of　themselves。


Enter　Servant；　drunk。


MARLOW。　　You；　Jeremy！　　Come　forward；　sirrah！　　What　were　my　orders？　　Were　you　not　told　to　drink　freely；　and　call　for　what　you　thought　fit；　for　the　good　of　the　house？

HARDCASTLE。　　（Aside。）　　I　begin　to　lose　my　patience。

JEREMY。　　Please　your　honour；　liberty　and　Fleet…street　for　ever！　　Though　I'm　but　a　servant；　I'm　as　good　as　another　man。　　I'll　drink　for　no　man　before　supper；　sir；　damme！　　Good　liquor　will　sit　upon　a　good　supper；　but　a　good　supper　will　not　sit　uponhiccupon　my　conscience；　sir。

MARLOW。　　You　see；　my　old　friend；　the　fellow　is　as　drunk　as　he　can　possibly　be。　　I　don't　know　what　you'd　have　more；　unless　you'd　have　the　poor　devil　soused　in　a　beer…barrel。

HARDCASTLE。　　Zounds！　he'll　drive　me　distracted；　if　I　contain　myself　any　longer。　　Mr。　MarlowSir；　I　have　submitted　to　your　insolence　for　more　than　four　hours；　and　I　see　no　likelihood　of　its　coming　to　an　end。　　I'm　now　resolved　to　be　master　here；　sir；　and　I　desire　that　you　and　your　drunken　pack　may　leave　my　house　directly。

MARLOW。　　Leave　your　house！Sure　you　jest；　my　good　friend！　　What？　when　I'm　doing　what　I　can　to　please　you。

HARDCASTLE。　　I　tell　you；　sir；　you　don't　please　me；　so　I　desire　you'll　leave　my　house。

MARLOW。　　Sure　you　cannot　be　serious？　　At　this　time　o'　night；　and　such　a　night？　　You　only　mean　to　banter　me。

HARDCASTLE。　　I　tell　you；　sir；　I'm　serious！　and　now　that　my　passions　are　roused；　I　say　this　house　is　mine；　sir；　this　house　is　mine；　and　I　command　you　to　leave　it　directly。

MARLOW。　　Ha！　ha！　ha！　　A　puddle　in　a　storm。　　I　shan't　stir　a　step；　I　assure　you。　　（In　a　serious　tone。）　　This　your　house；　fellow！　　It's　my　house。　　This　is　my　house。　　Mine；　while　I　choose　to　stay。　　What　right　have　you　to　bid　me　leave　this　house；　sir？　　I　never　met　with　such　impudence；　curse　me；　never　in　my　whole　life　before。

HARDCASTLE。　　Nor　I；　confound　me　if　ever　I　did。　　To　come　to　my　house；　to　call　for　what　he　likes；　to　turn　me　out　of　my　own　chair；　to　insult　the　family；　to　order　his　servants　to　get　drunk；　and　then　to　tell　me；　〃This　house　is　mine；　sir。〃　　By　all　that's　impudent；　it　makes　me　laugh。　　Ha！　ha！　ha！　　Pray；　sir　（bantering）；　as　you　take　the　house；　what　think　you　of　taking　the　rest　of　the　furniture？　　There's　a　pair　of　silver　candlesticks；　and　there's　a　fire…screen；　and　here's　a　pair　of　brazen