adam bede(亚当[1].比德)-第106章
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Seth felt in an instant what the marks meant—not drunkenness；
but some great calamity。 Adam looked up at him without
speaking； and Seth moved forward towards the bench； himself
trembling so that speech did not come readily。
“God have mercy on us； Addy；” he said； in a low voice； sitting
down on the bench beside Adam； “what is it？”
Adam was unable to speak。 The strong man； accustomed to
suppress the signs of sorrow； had felt his heart swell like a child’s
at this first approach of sympathy。 He fell on Seth’s neck and
sobbed。
Seth was prepared for the worst now； for； even in his
recollections of their boyhood； Adam had never sobbed before。
“Is it death； Adam？ Is she dead？” he asked； in a low tone； when
Adam raised his head and was recovering himself。
“No； lad； but she’s gone—gone away from us。 She’s never been
to Snowfield。 Dinah’s been gone to Leeds ever since last Friday
was a fortnight； the very day Hetty set out。 I can’t find out where
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she went after she got to Stoniton。”
Seth was silent from utter astonishment： he knew nothing that
could suggest to him a reason for Hetty’s going away。
“Hast any notion what she’s done it for？” he said； at last。
“She can’t ha’ loved me。 She didn’t like our marriage when it
came nigh—that must be it；” said Adam。 He had determined to
mention no further reason。
“I hear Mother stirring；” said Seth。 “Must we tell her？”
“No； not yet；” said Adam； rising from the bench and pushing
the hair from his face； as if he wanted to rouse himself。 “I can’t
have her told yet； and I must set out on another journey directly；
after I’ve been to the village and th’ Hall Farm。 I can’t tell thee
where I’m going； and thee must say to her I’m gone on business as
nobody is to know anything about。 I’ll go and wash myself now。”
Adam moved towards the door of the workshop； but after a step or
two he turned round； and； meeting Seth’s eyes with a calm sad
glance； he said； “I must take all the money out o’ the tin box； lad；
but if anything happens to me； all the rest ’ll be thine； to take care
o’ Mother with。”
Seth was pale and trembling： he felt there was some terrible
secret under all this。 “Brother；” he said； faintly—he never called
Adam “Brother” except in solemn moments—“I don’t believe
you’ll do anything as you can’t ask God’s blessing on。”
“Nay； lad；” said Adam； “don’t be afraid。 I’m for doing nought
but what’s a man’s duty。”
The thought that if he betrayed his trouble to his mother； she
would only distress him by words； half of blundering affection； half
of irrepressible triumph that Hetty proved as unfit to be his wife as
she had always foreseen； brought back some of his habitual
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firmness and self…command。 He had felt ill on his journey home—
he told her when she came down—had stayed all night at
Treddleston for that reason； and a bad headache； that still hung
about him this morning； accounted for his paleness and heavy
eyes。
He determined to go to the village； in the first place； attend to
his business for an hour； and give notice to Burge of his being
obliged to go on a journey； which he must beg him not to mention
to any one； for he wished to avoid going to the Hall Farm near
breakfast…time； when the children and servants would be in the
house…place； and there must be exclamations in their hearing
about his having returned without Hetty。 He waited until the clock
struck nine before he left the work…yard at the village； and set off；
through the fields； towards the Farm。 It was an immense relief to
him； as he came near the Home Close； to see Mr。 Poyser
advancing towards him； for this would spare him the pain of going
to the house。 Mr。 Poyser was walking briskly this March morning；
with a sense of spring business on his mind： he was going to cast
the master’s eye on the shoeing of a new cart…horse； carrying his
spud as a useful companion by the way。 His surprise was great
when he caught sight of Adam； but he was not a man given to
presentiments of evil。
“Why； Adam； lad； is’t you？ Have ye been all this time away and
not brought the lasses back； after all？ Where are they？”
“No； I’ve not brought ’em；” said Adam； turning round； to
indicate that he wished to walk back with Mr。 Poyser。
“Why；” said Martin； looking with sharper attention at Adam；
“ye look bad。 Is there anything happened？”
“Yes；” said Adam； heavily。 “A sad thing’s happened。 I didna
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find Hetty at Snowfield。”
Mr。 Poyser’s good…natured face showed signs of troubled
astonishment。 “Not find her？ What’s happened to her？” he said；
his thoughts flying at once to bodily accident。
“That I can’t tell； whether anything’s happened to her。 She
never went to Snowfield—she took the coach to Stoniton； but I
can’t learn nothing of her after she got down from the Stoniton
coach。”
“Why； you donna mean she’s run away？” said Martin； standing
still； so puzzled and bewildered that the fact did not yet make itself
felt as a trouble by him。
“She must ha’ done；” said Adam。 “She didn’t like our marriage
when it came to the point—that must be it。 She’d mistook her
feelings。”
Martin was silent for a minute or two； looking on the ground
and rooting up the grass with his spud； without knowing what he
was doing。 His usual slowness was always trebled when the
subject of speech was painful。 At last he looked up； right in Adam’s
face； saying； “Then she didna deserve t’ ha’ ye； my lad。 An’ I feel i’
fault myself； for she was my niece； and I was allays hot for her
marr’ing ye。 There’s no amends I can make ye； lad—the more’s
the pity： it’s a sad cut…up for ye； I doubt。”
Adam could say nothing； and Mr。 Poyser； after pursuing his
walk for a little while； went on； “I’ll be bound she’s gone after
trying to get a lady’s maid’s place； for she’d got that in her head
half a year ago； and wanted me to gi’ my consent。 But I’d thought
better on her”—he added； shaking his head slowly and sadly—“I’d
thought better on her； nor to look for this； after she’d gi’en y’ her
word； an’ everything been got ready。”
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Adam had the strongest motives for encouraging this
supposition in Mr。 Poyser； and he even tried to believe that it
might possibly be true。 He had no warrant for the certainty that
she was gone to Arthur。
“It was better it should be so；” he said； as quietly as he could； “if
she felt she couldn’t like me for a husband。 Better run away before
than repent after。 I hope you won’t look harshly on her if she
comes back； as she may do if she finds it hard to get on away from
home。”
“I canna look on her as I’ve done before；” said Martin
decisively。 “She’s acted bad by you； and by all of us。 But I’ll not
turn my back on her： she’s but a young un； and it’s the first harm
I’ve knowed on her。 It’ll be a hard job for me to tell her aunt。 Why
didna Dinah come back wi’ ye？ She’d ha’ helped to pacify her aunt
a bit。”
“Dinah wasn’t at Snowfield。 She’s been gone to Leeds this
fortnight； and I couldn’t learn from th’ old woman any direction
where she is at Leeds； else I should ha’ brought it you。”
“She’d a deal better be staying wi’ her own kin；” said Mr。
Poyser； indignantly； “than going preaching among strange folks a…
that’n。”
“I must leave you now； Mr。 Poyser；” said Adam； “for I’ve a deal
to see to。”
“Aye； you’d best be after your business； and I must tell the
missis when I go home。 It’s a hard job。”
“But；” said Adam； “I beg particular； you’ll keep what’s
happened quiet for a week or two。 I’ve not told my mother yet； and
there’s no knowing how things may turn out。”
“Aye； aye； least said； soonest mended。 We’n no need to say why
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the match is broke off； an’ we may hear of her after a bit。 Shake
hands wi’ me； lad： I wish I could make thee amends。”
There was something in Martin Poyser’s throat at that moment
which caused him to bring out those scanty words in rather a
broken fashion。 Yet Adam knew what they meant all the better；
and the two honest men grasped each other’s hard hands in
mutual understanding。
There was nothing now to hinder Adam from setting off。 He
had told Seth to go to the Chase and leave a message for the
squire； saying that Adam Bede had been obliged to start
