bureaucracy-第25章

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le　baron；'　because　I　am　reserving　his　honors　till　the　last；　when　they

rained　upon　him。〃



Bixiou。　〃Oh！　very　good；　that's　theatrical；the　finale　of　the

article。〃



Du　Bruel　＇continuing＇。　〃'In　appointing　Monsieur　de　la　Billardiere

gentleman…in…ordinary'〃



Bixiou。　〃Very　ordinary！〃



Du　Bruel。　〃'of　the　Bedchamber；　the　King　rewarded　not　only　the

services　rendered　by　the　Provost；　who　knew　how　to　harmonize　the

severity　of　his　functions　with　the　customary　urbanity　of　the　Bourbons；

but　the　bravery　of　the　Vendean　hero；　who　never　bent　the　knee　to　the

imperial　idol。　He　leaves　a　son；　who　inherits　his　loyalty　and　his

talents。'〃



Bixiou。　〃Don't　you　think　all　that　is　a　little　too　florid？　I　should

tone　down　the　poetry。　'Imperial　idol！'　'bent　the　knee！'　damn　it；　my

dear　fellow；　writing　vaudevilles　has　ruined　your　style；　you　can't　come

down　to　pedestrial　prose。　I　should　say；　'He　belonged　to　the　small

number　of　those　who。'　Simplify；　simplify！　the　man　himself　was　a

simpleton。〃



Du　Bruel。　〃That's　vaudeville；　if　you　like！　You　would　make　your　fortune

at　the　theatre；　Bixiou。〃



Bixiou。　〃What　have　you　said　about　Quiberon？〃　＇Reads　over　du　Bruel's

shoulder。＇　〃Oh；　that　won't　do！　Here；　this　is　what　you　must　say：　'He

took　upon　himself；　in　a　book　recently　published；　the　responsibility

for　all　the　blunders　of　the　expedition　to　Quiberon；thus　proving　the

nature　of　his　loyalty；　which　did　not　shrink　from　any　sacrifice。'

That's　clever　and　witty；　and　exalts　La　Billardiere。〃



Du　Bruel。　〃At　whose　expense？〃



Bixiou　＇solemn　as　a　priest　in　a　pulpit＇。　〃Why；　Hoche　and　Tallien；　of

course；　don't　you　read　history？〃



Du　Bruel。　〃No。　I　subscribed　to　the　Baudouin　series；　but　I've　never　had

time　to　open　a　volume；　one　can't　find　matter　for　vaudevilles　there。〃



Phellion　＇at　the　door＇。　〃We　all　want　to　know；　Monsieur　Bixiou；　what

made　you　think　that　the　worthy　and　honorable　Monsieur　Rabourdin；　who

has　so　long　done　the　work　of　this　division　for　Monsieur　de　la

Billardiere；he；　who　is　the　senior　head　of　all　the　bureaus；　and　whom；

moreover；　the　minister　summoned　as　soon　as　he　heard　of　the　departure

of　the　late　Monsieur　de　la　Billardiere；will　not　be　appointed　head　of

the　division。〃



Bixiou。　〃Papa　Phellion；　you　know　geography？〃



Phellion　＇bridling　up＇。　〃I　should　say　so！〃



Bixiou。　〃And　history？〃



Phellion　＇affecting　modesty＇。　〃Possibly。〃



Bixiou　＇looking　fixedly　at　him＇。　〃Your　diamond　pin　is　loose；　it　is

coming　out。　Well；　you　may　know　all　that；　but　you　don't　know　the　human

heart；　you　have　gone　no　further　in　the　geography　and　history　of　that

organ　than　you　have　in　the　environs　of　the　city　of　Paris。〃



Poiret　＇to　Vimeux＇。　〃Environs　of　Paris？　I　thought　they　were　talking　of

Monsieur　Rabourdin。〃



Bixiou。　〃About　that　bet？　Does　the　entire　bureau　Rabourdin　bet　against

me？〃



All。　〃Yes。〃



Bixiou。　〃Du　Bruel；　do　you　count　in？〃



Du　Bruel。　〃Of　course　I　do。　We　want　Rabourdin　to　go　up　a　step　and　make

room　for　others。〃



Bixiou。　〃Well；　I　accept　the　bet；for　this　reason；　you　can　hardly

understand　it；　but　I'll　tell　it　to　you　all　the　same。　It　would　be　right

and　just　to　appoint　Monsieur　Rabourdin〃　＇looking　full　at　Dutocq＇；

〃because；　in　that　case；　long　and　faithful　service；　honor；　and　talent

would　be　recognized；　appreciated；　and　properly　rewarded。　Such　an

appointment　is　in　the　best　interests　of　the　administration。〃

＇Phellion；　Poiret；　and　Thuillier　listen　stupidly；　with　the　look　of

those　who　try　to　peer　before　them　in　the　darkness。＇　〃Well；　it　is　just

because　the　promotion　would　be　so　fitting；　and　because　the　man　has

such　merit；　and　because　the　measure　is　so　eminently　wise　and　equitable

that　I　bet　Rabourdin　will　not　be　appointed。　Yes；　you'll　see；　that

appointment　will　slip　up；　just　like　the　invasion　from　Boulogne；　and

the　march　to　Russia；　for　the　success　of　which　a　great　genius　has

gathered　together　all　the　chances。　It　will　fail　as　all　good　and　just

things　do　fail　in　this　low　world。　I　am　only　backing　the　devil's　game。〃



Du　Bruel。　〃Who　do　you　think　will　be　appointed？〃



Bixiou。　〃The　more　I　think　about　Baudoyer；　the　more　sure　I　feel　that　he

unites　all　the　opposite　qualities；　therefore　I　think　he　will　be　the

next　head　of　this　division。〃



Dutocq。　〃But　Monsieur　des　Lupeaulx；　who　sent　for　me　to　borrow　my

Charlet；　told　me　positively　that　Monsieur　Rabourdin　was　appointed；　and

that　the　little　La　Billardiere　would　be　made　Clerk　of　the　Seals。〃



Bixiou。　〃Appointed；　indeed！　The　appointment　can't　be　made　and　signed

under　ten　days。　It　will　certainly　not　be　known　before　New…Year's　day。

There　he　goes　now　across　the　courtyard；　look　at　him；　and　say　if　the

virtuous　Rabourdin　looks　like　a　man　in　the　sunshine　of　favor。　I　should

say　he　knows　he's　dismissed。〃　＇Fleury　rushes　to　the　window。＇

〃Gentlemen；　adieu；　I'll　go　and　tell　Monsieur　Baudoyer　that　I　hear　from

you　that　Rabourdin　is　appointed；　it　will　make　him　furious；　the　pious

creature！　Then　I'll　tell　him　of　our　wager；　to　cool　him　down；a

process　we　call　at　the　theatre　turning　the　Wheel　of　Fortune；　don't　we；

du　Bruel？　Why　do　I　care　who　gets　the　place？　simply　because　if　Baudoyer

does　he　will　make　me　under…head…clerk〃　＇goes　out＇。



Poiret。　〃Everybody　says　that　man　is　clever；　but　as　for　me；　I　can　never

understand　a　word　he　says〃　＇goes　on　copying＇。　〃I　listen　and　listen；　I

hear　words；　but　I　never　get　at　any　meaning；　he　talks　about　the

environs　of　Paris　when　he　discusses　the　human　heart　and〃　＇lays　down

his　pen　and　goes　to　the　stove＇　〃declares　he　backs　the　devil's　game

when　it　is　a　question　of　Russia　and　Boulogne；　now　what　is　there　so

clever　in　that；　I'd　like　to　know？　We　must　first　admit　that　the　devil

plays　any　game　at　all；　and　then　find　out　what　game；　possibly　dominoes〃

＇blows　his　nose＇。



Fleury　＇interrupting＇。　〃Pere　Poiret　is　blowing　his　nose；　it　must　be

eleven　o'clock。〃



Du　Bruel。　〃So　it　is！　Goodness！　I'm　off　to　the　secretary；　he　wants　to

read　the　obituary。〃



Poiret。　〃What　was　I　saying？〃



Thuillier。　〃Dominoes；perhaps　the　devil　plays　dominoes。〃　＇Sebastien

enters　to　gather　up　the　different　papers　and　circulars　for　signature。＇



Vimeux。　〃Ah！　there　you　are；　my　fine　young　man。　Your　days　of　hardship

are　nearly　over；　you'll　get　a　post。　Monsieur　Rabourdin　will　be

appointed。　Weren't　you　at　Madame　Rabourdin's　last　night？　Lucky　fellow！

they　say　that　really　superb　women　go　there。〃



Sebastien。　〃Do　they？　I　didn't　know。〃



Fleury。　〃Are　you　blind？〃



Sebastien。　〃I　don't　like　to　look　at　what　I　ought　not　to　see。〃



Phellion　＇delighted＇。　〃Well　said；　young　man！〃



Vimeux。　〃The　devil！　well；　you　looked　at　Madame　Rabourdin　enough；　any

how；　a　charming　woman。〃



Fleury。　〃Pooh！　thin　as　a　rail。　I　saw　her　in　the　Tuileries；　and　I　much

prefer　Percilliee；　the　ballet…mistress；　Castaing's　victim。〃



Phellion。　〃What　has　an　actress　to　do　with　the　wife　of　a　government

official？〃



Dutocq。　〃They　both　play　comedy。〃



Fleury　＇looking　askance　at　Dutocq＇。　〃The　physical　has　nothing　to　do

with　the　moral；　and　if　you　mean〃



Dutocq。　〃I　mean　nothing。〃



Fleury。　〃Do　you　all　want　to　know　which　of　us　will　really　be　made　head

of　this　bureau？〃



All。　〃Yes；　tell　us。〃



Fleury。　〃Colleville。〃



Thuillier。　〃Why？〃



Fleury。　〃Because　Madame　Colleville　has　taken　the　shortest　way　to　it

through　the　sacristy。〃



Thuillier。　〃I　am　too　much　Colleville's　friend　not　to　beg　you；　Monsieur

Fleury；　to　speak　respectfully　of　his　wife。〃



Phellion。　〃A　defenceless　woman　should　never　be　made　the　subject　of

conversation　here〃



Vimeux。　〃All　the　more　because　the　charming　Madame　Colleville　won't

invite　Fleury　to　her　house。　He　backbites　her　in　revenge。〃



Fleury。　〃She　may　not　receive　me　on　the　same　footing　that　she　does

Thuillier；　but　I　go　there〃



Thuillier。　〃When？　how？under　her　windows？〃



Though　Fleury　was　dreaded　as　a　bully　in　all　the　offices；　he　received

Thuillier's　speech　in　silence。　This　meekness；　which　surprised　the

other　clerks；　was　owing　to　a　certain　note　for　two　hundred　francs；　of

doubtful　value；　which　Thuillier　agreed　to　pass　over　to　his　sister。

After　this　skirmish　dead　silence　prevailed。　They　all　wrote　steadily

from　one　to　three　o'clock。　Du　Bruel　did　not　return。



About　half…past　three　the　usual　preparations　for　departure；　the

brushing　of　hats；　the　changing　of　coats；　went　on　in　all　the

ministerial　offices。　That　precious　thirty　minutes　thus　employed　served

to　shorten　by　just　so　much　the　day's　labor。　At　this　hour　the　over…

heated　rooms　cool　off；　the　peculiar　odor　that　hangs　about　the　bureaus

evaporates；　silence　is　restored。　By　four　o'clock　none　but　a　few　clerks

who　do　their　duty　conscientiously　remain。　A　minister　may　know　who　are

the　real　workers　under　him　if　he　will　take　the　trouble　to　walk　through

the　divisions　after　four　o'clock；a　species　of　prying；　however；　that

no　one　of　his　dignity　would　condescend　to。



The　various　heads　of　divisions　and　bureaus　usually　encountered　each

other　in　the　courtyards　at　this　hour　and　exchanged　opinions　on　the

events　of　the　day。　On　this　occasion　they　departed　by　twos　and　threes；

most　of　them　agreeing　in　favor　of　Rabourdin；　while　the　old　stagers；

like　Monsieur　Clergeot；　shook　their　heads　and　said；　〃Habent　sua　sidera

lites。〃　Saillard　and　Baudoyer　were　politely　avoided；　for　nobody　knew

what　to　say　to　them　about　La　Billardiere's　death；　it　being　fully

understood　that　Baudoyer　wanted　the　place；　though　it　was　certainly　not

due　to　him。



When　Saillard　and　his　son…in…law　had　gone　a　certain　distance　from　the

ministry　the　former　broke　silence　and　said：　〃Things　look　badly　for

you；　my　poor　Baudoyer。〃



〃I　can't　understand；〃　replied　the　other；　〃what　Elisabeth　was　dreaming

of　when　she　sent　Godard　in　such　a　hurry　to　get　a　passport　for　Falleix；

Godard　tells　me　she　hired　a　post…chaise　by　the　advice　of　my　uncle

Mitral；　and　that　Falleix　has　already　started　for　his　own　part　of　the

country。〃



〃Some　matter　connected　with　our　business；〃　suggested　Saillard。



〃Our　most　pressing　business　just　now　is　to　look　after　Monsieur　La

Billardiere's　place；〃　returned　Baudoyer；　crossly。



They　were　just　then　near　the　entrance　of　the　Palais…Royal　on　the　rue

Saint…Honore。　Dutocq　came　up；　bowing；　and　joined　them。



〃Monsieur；〃　he　said　to　Baudoyer；　〃if　I　can　be　useful　to　you　in　any　way

under　the　circumstances　in　which　you　find　yourself；　pray　command　me；

for　I　am　not　less　devoted　to　your　interests　than　Monsieur　Godard。〃



〃Such　an　assurance　is　at　least　consoling；〃　replied　Baudoyer；　〃it　makes

me　aware　that　I　have　the　confidence　of　honest　men。〃



〃If　you　would　kindly　employ　your　influence　to　get　me　placed　in　your

division；　taking　Bixiou　as　head　of　the　bureau　and　me　as　under…head…

clerk；　you　will　secure　the　future　of　two　men　who　are　ready　to　do

anything　for　your　advancement。〃



〃Are　you　making　fun　of　us；　monsieur？〃　asked　Saillard；　staring　at　him

stupidly。



〃Far　be　it　from　me　to　do　that；〃　s