the miscellaneous writings and speeches-1-第24章

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ory　opinions　or　his　unredeemed　pledges。　　He　may　be　as　superficial；　as　inconsistent；　and　as　careless　as　he　chooses。　　Magazines　resemble　those　little　angels；　who；　according　to　the　pretty　Rabbinical　tradition；　are　generated　every　morning　by　the　brook　which　rolls　over　the　flowers　of　Paradise；whose　life　is　a　song；who　warble　till　sunset；　and　then　sink　back　without　regret　into　nothingness。　　Such　spirits　have　nothing　to　do　with　the　detecting　spear　of　Ithuriel　or　the　victorious　sword　of　Michael。　　It　is　enough　for　them　to　please　and　be　forgotten。

。。。


A　PROPHETIC　ACCOUNT　OF　A　GRAND　NATIONAL　EPIC　POEM；　TO　BE　ENTITLED　〃THE　WELLINGTONIAD；〃　AND　TO　BE　PUBLISHED　A。D。　2824。

（November　1824。）

How　I　became　a　prophet　it　is　not　very　important　to　the　reader　to　know。　　Nevertheless　I　feel　all　the　anxiety　which；　under　similar　circumstances；　troubled　the　sensitive　mind　of　Sidrophel；　and；　like　him；　am　eager　to　vindicate　myself　from　the　suspicion　of　having　practised　forbidden　arts；　or　held　intercourse　with　beings　of　another　world。　　I　solemnly　declare；　therefore；　that　I　never　saw　a　ghost；　like　Lord　Lyttleton；　consulted　a　gipsy；　like　Josephine；　or　heard　my　name　pronounced　by　an　absent　person；　like　Dr　Johnson。　　Though　it　is　now　almost　as　usual　for　gentlemen　to　appear　at　the　moment　of　their　death　to　their　friends　as　to　call　on　them　during　their　life；　none　of　my　acquaintance　have　been　so　polite　as　to　pay　me　that　customary　attention。　　I　have　derived　my　knowledge　neither　from　the　dead　nor　from　the　living；　neither　from　the　lines　of　a　hand；　nor　from　the　grounds　of　a　tea…cup；　neither　from　the　stars　of　the　firmament；　nor　from　the　fiends　of　the　abyss。　　I　have　never；　like　the　Wesley　family；　heard　〃that　mighty　leading　angel；〃　who　〃drew　after　him　the　third　part　of　heaven's　sons；〃　scratching　in　my　cupboard。　I　have　never　been　enticed　to　sign　any　of　those　delusive　bonds　which　have　been　the　ruin　of　so　many　poor　creatures；　and；　having　always　been　an　indifferent　horse　man；　I　have　been　careful　not　to　venture　myself　on　a　broomstick。

My　insight　into　futurity；　like　that　of　George　Fox　the　quaker；　and　that　of　our　great　and　philosophic　poet；　Lord　Byron；　is　derived　from　simple　presentiment。　　This　is　a　far　less　artificial　process　than　those　which　are　employed　by　some　others。　　Yet　my　predictions　will；　I　believe；　be　found　more　correct　than　theirs；　or；　at　all　events；　as　Sir　Benjamin　Back　bite　says　in　the　play；　〃more　circumstantial。〃

I　prophesy　then；　that；　in　the　year　2824；　according　to　our　present　reckoning；　a　grand　national　Epic　Poem；　worthy　to　be　compared　with　the　Iliad；　the　Aeneid；　or　the　Jerusalem；　will　be　published　in　London。

Men　naturally　take　an　interest　in　the　adventures　of　every　eminent　writer。　　I　will；　therefore；　gratify　the　laudable　curiosity；　which；　on　this　occasion；　will　doubtless　be　universal；　by　pre　fixing　to　my　account　of　the　poem　a　concise　memoir　of　the　poet。

Richard　Quongti　will　be　born　at　Westminster　on　the　1st　of　July；　2786。　　He　will　be　the　younger　son　of　the　younger　branch　of　one　of　the　most　respectable　families　in　England。　　He　will　be　linearly　descended　from　Quongti；　the　famous　Chinese　liberal；　who；　after　the　failure　of　the　heroic　attempt　of　his　party　to　obtain　a　constitution　from　the　Emperor　Fim　Fam；　will　take　refuge　in　England；　in　the　twenty…third　century。　　Here　his　descendants　will　obtain　considerable　note；　and　one　branch　of　the　family　will　be　raised　to　the　peerage。

Richard；　however；　though　destined　to　exalt　his　family　to　distinction　far　nobler　than　any　which　wealth　or　titles　can　bestow；　will　be　born　to　a　very　scanty　fortune。　　He　will　display　in　his　early　youth　such　striking　talents　as　will　attract　the　notice　of　Viscount　Quongti；　his　third　cousin；　then　secretary　of　state　for　the　Steam　Department。　　At　the　expense　of　this　eminent　nobleman；　he　will　be　sent　to　prosecute　his　studies　at　the　university　of　Tombuctoo。　　To　that　illustrious　seat　of　the　muses　all　the　ingenuous　youth　of　every　country　will　then　be　attracted　by　the　high　scientific　character　of　Professor　Quashaboo；　and　the　eminent　literary　attainments　of　Professor　Kissey　Kickey。　　In　spite　of　this　formidable　competition；　however；　Quongti　will　acquire　the　highest　honours　in　every　department　of　knowledge；　and　will　obtain　the　esteem　of　his　associates　by　his　amiable　and　unaffected　manners。　　The　guardians　of　the　young　Duke　of　Carrington；　premier　peer　of　England；　and　the　last　remaining　scion　of　the　ancient　and　illustrious　house　of　Smith；　will　be　desirous　to　secure　so　able　an　instructor　for　their　ward。　　With　the　Duke；　Quongti　will　perform　the　grand　tour；　and　visit　the　polished　courts　of　Sydney　and　Capetown。　　After　prevailing　on　his　pupil；　with　great　difficulty；　to　subdue　a　violent　and　imprudent　passion　which　he　had　conceived　for　a　Hottentot　lady；　of　great　beauty　and　accomplishments　indeed；　but　of　dubious　character；　he　will　travel　with　him　to　the　United　States　of　America。　　But　that　tremendous　war　which　will　be　fatal　to　American　liberty　will；　at　that　time；　be　raging　through　the　whole　federation。　　At　New　York　the　travellers　will　hear　of　the　final　defeat　and　death　of　the　illustrious　champion　of　freedom；　Jonathon　Higginbottom；　and　of　the　elevation　of　Ebenezer　Hogsflesh　to　the　perpetual　Presidency。　They　will　not　choose　to　proceed　in　a　journey　which　would　expose　them　to　the　insults　of　that　brutal　soldiery；　whose　cruelty　and　rapacity　will　have　devastated　Mexico　and　Colombia；　and　now；　at　length；　enslaved　their　own　country。

On　their　return　to　England；　A。D。　2810；　the　death　of　the　Duke　will　compel　his　preceptor　to　seek　for　a　subsistence　by　literary　labours。　　His　fame　will　be　raised　by　many　small　productions　of　considerable　merit；　and　he　will　at　last　obtain　a　permanent　place　in　the　highest　class　of　writers　by　his　great　epic　poem。

The　celebrated　work　will　become；　with　unexampled　rapidity；　a　popular　favourite。　　The　sale　will　be　so　beneficial　to　the　author　that；　instead　of　going　about　the　dirty　streets　on　his　velocipede；　he　will　be　enabled　to　set　up　his　balloon。

The　character　of　this　noble　poem　will　be　so　finely　and　justly　given　in　the　Tombuctoo　Review　for　April　2825；　that　I　cannot　refrain　from　translating　the　passage。　　The　author　will　be　our　poet's　old　preceptor；　Professor　Kissey　Kickey。

〃In　pathos；　in　splendour　of　language；　in　sweetness　of　versification；　Mr　Quongti　has　long　been　considered　as　unrivalled。　In　his　exquisite　poem　on　the　Ornithorhynchus　Paradoxus　all　these　qualities　are　displayed　in　their　greatest　perfection。　　How　exquisitely　does　that　work　arrest　and　embody　the　undefined　and　vague　shadows　which　flit　over　an　imaginative　mind。　　The　cold　worldling　may　not　comprehend　it；　but　it　will　find　a　response　in　the　bosom　of　every　youthful　poet；　of　every　enthusiastic　lover；　who　has　seen　an　Ornithorhynchus　Paradoxus　by　moonlight。　　But　we　were　yet　to　learn　that　he　possessed　the　comprehension；　the　judgment；　and　the　fertility　of　mind　indispensable　to　the　epic　poet。

〃It　is　difficult　to　conceive　a　plot　more　perfect　than　that　of　the　'Wellingtoniad。'　　It　is　most　faithful　to　the　manners　of　the　age　to　which　it　relates。　　It　preserves　exactly　all　the　historical　circumstances；　and　interweaves　them　most　artfully　with　all　the　speciosa　miracula　of　supernatural　agency。〃

Thus　far　the　learned　Professor　of　Humanity　in　the　university　of　Tombuctoo。　　I　fear　that　the　critics　of　our　time　will　form　an　opinion　diametrically　opposite　as　to　these　every　points。　　Some　will；　I　fear；　be　disgusted　by　the　machinery；　which　is　derived　from　the　mythology　of　ancient　Greece。　　I　can　only　say　that；　in　the　twenty…ninth　century；　that　machinery　will　be　universally　in　use　among　poets；　and　that　Quongti　will　use　it；　partly　in　conformity　with　the　general　practice；　and　partly　from　a　veneration；　perhaps　excessive；　for　the　great　remains　of　classical　antiquity；　which　will　then；　as　now；　be　assiduously　read　by　every　man　of　education；　though　Tom　Moore's　songs　will　be　forgotten；　and　only　three　copies　of　Lord　Byron's　works　will　exist：　　one　in　the　possession　of　King　George　the　Nineteenth；　one　in　the　Duke　of　Carrington's　collection；　and　one　in　the　library　of　the　British　Museum。　　Finally；　should　any　good　people　be　concerned　to　hear　that　Pagan　fictions　will　so　long　retain　their　influence　over　literature；　let　them　reflect　that；　as　the　Bishop　of　St　David's　says；　in　his　〃Proofs　of　the　Inspiration　of　the　Sibylline　Verses；〃　read　at　the　last　meeting　of　the　Royal　Society　of　Literature；　〃at　all　events；　a　Pagan　is　not　a　Papist。〃

Some　readers　of　the　present　day　may　think　that　Quongti　is　by　no　means　entitled　to　the　compliments　which　his　Negro　critic　pays　him　on　his　adherence　to　the　historical　circumstances　of　the　time　in　which　he　has　chosen　his　subject；　that；　where　he　introduces　any　trait　of　our　manners；　it　is　in　the　wrong　place；　and　that　he　confounds　the　customs　of　our　age　with　those　of　much　more　remote　periods。　　I　can　only　say　that　the　charge　is　infinitely　more　applicable　to　Homer；　Virgil；　and　Tasso。　　If；　therefore；　the　reader　should　detect；　in　the　following　abstract　of　the　plot；　any　little　deviation　from　strict　historical　accuracy；　let　him　reflect；　for　a　moment；　whether　Agamemnon　would　not　have　found　as　much　to　censure　in　the　Iliad；Dido　in　the　Aeneid；or　Godfrey　in　the　Jerusalem。　　Let　him　not　suffer　his　opinions　to　depend　on　circumstances　which　cannot　possibly　affect　the　truth　or　falsehood　of　the　representation。　　If　it　be　impossible　for　a　single　man　to　kill　hundreds　in　battle；　the　impossibility　is　not　diminished　by　distance　of　time。　　If　it　be　as　certain　that　Rinaldo　never　disenchanted　a　forest　in　Palestine　as　it　is　that　the　Duke　of　Wellington　never　disenchanted　the　forest　of　Soignies；　can　we；　as　rational　men；　tolerate　the　one　story　and　ridicule　the　other？　　Of　this；　at　least；　I　am　certain；　that　whatever　excuse　we　have　for　admiring　the　plots　of　those　famous　poems　our　children　will　have　for　extolling　that　of　the　〃Wellingtoniad。〃

I　shall　proceed　to　give　a　sketch　of　the　narrative。　　The　subject　is　〃The　Reign　of　the　Hundred　Days。〃

BOOK　I。

The　poem　commences；　in　form；　with　a　solemn　proposition　of　the　subject。　　Then　the　muse　is　invoked　to　give　the　poet　accurate　information　as　to　the　causes　of　so　terrible　a　commotion。　　The　answer　to　this　question；　being；　it　is　to　be　supposed；　the　joint　production　of　the　poet　and　the　muse；　ascribes　the　event　to　circumstances　which　have　hitherto　eluded　all　the　research　of　political　writers；　namely；　the　influence　of　the　god　Mars；　who；　we　are　told；　had　some　forty　years　before　usurped　the　conjugal　rights　of　old　Carlo　Buonaparte；　and　given　birth　to　Napoleon。　　By　his　incitement　it　was　that　the　emperor　with　his　devoted　companions　was　now　on　the　sea；　returning　to　his　ancient　dominions。　　The　gods　were　at　present；　fortunately　for　the　adventurer；　feasting　with　the　Ethiopians；　whose　entertainments；　according　to　the　ancient　custom　described　by　Homer；　they　annually　attended；　with　the　same　sort　of　condescending　gluttony　which　now　carries　the　cabinet　to　Guildhall　on　the　9th　of　November。　　Neptune　was；　in　consequence；　absent；　and　unable　to　prevent　the　enemy　of　his　favourite　island　from　crossing　his　element。　　Boreas；　however；　who　had　his　abode　on　the　banks　of　the　Russian　ocean；　and　who；　like　Thetis　in　the　Iliad；　was　not　of　sufficient　quality　to　have　an　invitation　to　Ethiopia；　resolves　to　destroy　the　armament　which　brings　war　and　danger　to　his　beloved　Alexander。　　H