christian science-第16章

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In　this　Article　there　is　another　exhibition　of　a　couple　of　the　large
features　of　Mrs。　Eddy's　remarkable　make…up：　her　business…talent　and　her
knowledge　of　human　nature。

She　does　not　beseech　and　implore　people　to　join　her　Church。　　She　knows
the　human　race　better　than　that。　　She　gravely　goes　through　the　motions　of
reluctantly　granting　admission　to　the　applicant　as　a　favor　to　him。　　The
idea　is　worth　untold　shekels。　　She　does　not　stand　at　the　gate　of　the　fold
with　welcoming　arms　spread；　and　receive　the　lost　sheep　with　glad　emotion
and　set　up　the　fatted　calf　and　invite　the　neighbor　and　have　a　time。　　No；
she　looks　upon　him　coldly；　she　snubs　him；　she　says：

〃Who　are　you？　　Who　is　your　sponsor？　　Who　asked　you　to　come　here？　　Go
away；　and　don't　come　again　until　you　are　invited。〃

It　is　calculated　to　strikingly　impress　a　person　accustomed　to　Moody　and
Sankey　and　Sam　Jones　revivals；　accustomed　to　brain…turning　appeals　to　the
unknown　and　unendorsed　sinner　to　come　forward　and　enter　into　the　joy；
etc。　〃just　as　he　is〃；　accustomed　to　seeing　him　do　it；　accustomed　to
seeing　him　pass　up　the　aisle　through　sobbing　seas　of　welcome；　and　love；
and　congratulation；　and　arrive　at　the　mourner's　bench　and　be　received
like　a　long…lost　government　bond。

No；　there　is　nothing　of　that　kind　in　Mrs。　Eddy's　system。　　She　knows　that
if　you　wish　to　confer　upon　a　human　being　something　which　he　is　not　sure
he　wants；　the　best　way　is　to　make　it　apparently　difficult　for　him　to　get
itthen　he　is　no　son　of　Adam　if　that　apple　does　not　assume　an　interest
in　his　eyes　which　it　lacked　before。　　In　time　this　interest　can　grow　into
desire。　　Mrs。　Eddy　knows　that　when　you　cannot　get　a　man　to　tryfree　of
costa　new　and　effective　remedy　for　a　disease　he　is　afflicted　with；　you
can　generally　sell　it　to　him　if　you　will　put　a　price　upon　it　which　he
cannot　afford。　　When；　in　the　beginning；　she　taught　Christian　Science
gratis　（for　good　reasons）；　pupils　were　few　and　reluctant；　and　required
persuasion；　it　was　when　she　raised　the　limit　to　three　hundred　dollars　for
a　dollar's　worth　that　she　could　not　find　standing　room　for　the　invasion
of　pupils　that　followed。

With　fine　astuteness　she　goes　through　the　motions　of　making　it　difficult
to　get　membership　in　her　Church。　　There　is　a　twofold　value　in　this
system：　it　gives　membership　a　high　value　in　the　eyes　of　the　applicant；
and　at　the　same　time　the　requirements　exacted　enable　Mrs。　Eddy　to　keep
him　out　if　she　has　doubts　about　his　value　to　her。　　A　word　further　as　to
applications　for　membership：

〃Applications　of　students　of　the　Metaphysical　College　must　be　signed　by
the　Board　of　Directors。〃

That　is　safe。　　Mrs。　Eddy　is　proprietor　of　that　Board。

Children　of　twelve　may　be　admitted　if　invited　by　〃one　of　Mrs。　Eddy's
loyal　students；　or　by　a　First　Member；　or　by　a　Director。〃

These　sponsors　are　the　property　of　Mrs。　Eddy；　therefore　her　Church　is
safeguarded　from　the　intrusion　of　undesirable　children。

Other　Students。　　Applicants　who　have　not　studied　with　Mrs。　Eddy　can　get
in　only　〃by　invitation　and　recommendation　from　students　of　Mrs。　Eddy　。　　。
。　　or　from　members　of　the　Mother…Church。〃

Other　paragraphs　explain　how　two　or　three　other　varieties　of　applicants
are　to　be　challenged　and　obstructed；　and　tell　us　who　is　authorized　to
invite　them；　recommend　them　endorse　them；　and　all　that。

The　safeguards　are　definite；　and　would　seem　to　be　sufficiently　strenuous
to　Mr。　Sam　Jones；　at　any　rate。　　Not　for　Mrs。　Eddy。　　She　adds　this
clincher：

〃The　candidates　be　elected　by　a　majority　vote　of　the　First　Members
present。〃

That　is　the　aristocracy；　the　aborigines；　the　Sanhedrin。　　It　is　Mrs。
Eddy's　property。　　She　herself　is　the　Sanhedrin。　　No　one　can　get　into　the
Church　if　she　wishes　to　keep　him　out。

This　veto　power　could　some　time　or　other　have　a　large　value　for　her；
therefore　she　was　wise　to　reserve　it。

It　is　likely　that　it　is　not　frequently　used。　　It　is　also　probable　that
the　difficulties　attendant　upon　getting　admission　to　membership　have　been
instituted　more　to　invite　than　to　deter；　more　to　enhance　the　value　of
membership　and　make　people　long　for　it　than　to　make　it　really　difficult
to　get。　　I　think　so；　because　the　Mother。　　Church　has　many　thousands　of
members　more　than　its　building　can　accommodate。




AND　SOME　ENGLISH　REQUIRED

Mrs。　Eddy　is　very　particular　as　regards　one　detail　curiously　so；　for　her；
all　things　considered。　　The　Church　Readers　must　be　〃good　English
scholars〃；　they　must　be　〃thorough　English　scholars。〃

She　is　thus　sensitive　about　the　English　of　her　subordinates　for　cause；
possibly。　　In　her　chapter　defining　the　duties　of　the　Clerk　there　is　an
indication　that　she　harbors　resentful　memories　of　an　occasion　when　the
hazy　quality　of　her　own　English　made　unforeseen　and　mortifying　trouble：

〃Understanding　Communications。　　Sec。　　2。　　If　the　Clerk　of　this　Church
shall　receive　a　communication　from　the　Pastor　Emeritus　which　he　does　not
fully　understand；　he　shall　inform　her　of　this　fact　before　presenting　it
to　the　Church；　and　obtain　a　clear　understanding　of　the　matterthen　act
in　accordance　therewith。〃

She　should　have　waited　to　calm　down；　then；　but　instead　she　added　this；
which　lacks　sugar：

〃Failing　to　adhere　to　this　By…law；　the　Clerk　must　resign。〃

I　wish　I　could　see　that　communication　that　broke　the　camel's　back。　　It
was　probably　the　one　beginning：　〃What　plague　spot　or　bacilli　were　gnawing
at　the　heart　of　this　metropolis　and　bringing　it　on　bended　knee？〃　and　I
think　it　likely　that　the　kindly　disposed　Clerk　tried　to　translate　it　into
English　and　lost　his　mind　and　had　to　go　to　the　hospital。　　That　Bylaw　was
not　the　offspring　of　a　forecast；　an　intuition；　it　was　certainly　born　of　a
sorrowful　experience。　　Its　temper　gives　the　fact　away。

The　little　book　of　By…laws　has　manifestly　been　tinkered　by　one　of　Mrs。
Eddy's　〃　thorough　English　scholars；〃　for　in　the　majority　of　cases　its
meanings　are　clear。　　The　book　is　not　even　marred　by　Mrs。　Eddy's　peculiar
specialtylumbering　clumsinesses　of　speech。　　I　believe　the　salaried
polisher　has　weeded　them　all　out　but　one。　　In　one　place；　after　referring
to　Science　and　Health；　Mrs。　Eddy　goes　on　to　say　〃the　Bible　and　the　above…
…named　book；　with　other　works　by　the　same　author；〃　etc。

It　is　an　unfortunate　sentence；　for　it　could　mislead　a　hasty　or　careless
reader　for　a　moment。　　Mrs。　Eddy　framed　itit　is　her　very　ownit　bears
her　trade…mark。　　〃The　Bible　and　Science　and　Health；　with　other　works　by
the　same　author；〃　could　have　come　from　no　literary　vacuum　but　the　one
which　produced　the　remark　（in　the　Autobiography）：　〃I　remember　reading；　in
my　childhood；　certain　manuscripts　containing　Scriptural　Sonnets；　besides
other　verses　and　enigmas。〃

We　know　what　she　means；　in　both　instances；　but　a　low…priced　Clerk　would
not　necessarily　know；　and　on　a　salary　like　his　he　could　quite　excusably
aver　that　the　Pastor　Emeritus　had　commanded　him　to　come　and　make
proclamation　that　she　was　author　of　the　Bible；　and　that　she　was　thinking
of　discharging　some　Scriptural　sonnets　and　other　enigmas　upon　the
congregation。　　It　could　lose　him　his　place；　but　it　would　not　be　fair；　if
it　happened　before　the　edict　about　〃Understanding　Communications〃　was
promulgated。




〃READERS〃　AGAIN

The　By…law　book　makes　a　showy　pretence　of　orderliness　and　system；　but　it
is　only　a　pretence。　　I　will　not　go　so　far　as　to　say　it　is　a　harum…scarum
jumble；　for　it　is　not　that；　but　I　think　it　fair　to　say　it　is　at　least
jumbulacious　in　places。　　For　instance；　Articles　III。　　and　IV。　　set　forth
in　much　detail　the　qualifications　and　duties　of　Readers；　she　then　skips
some　thirty　pages　and　takes　up　the　subject　again。　　It　looks　like
slovenliness；　but　it　may　be　only　art。　　The　belated　By…law　has　a
sufficiently　quiet　look；　but　it　has　a　ton　of　dynamite　in　it。　　It　makes
all　the　Christian　Science　Church　Readers　on　the　globe　the　personal
chattels　of　Mrs。　Eddy。　　Whenever　she　chooses；　she　can　stretch　her　long
arm　around　the　world's　fat　belly　and　flirt　a　Reader　out　of　his　pulpit；
though　he　be　tucked　away　in　seeming　safety　and　obscurity　in　a　lost
village　in　the　middle　of　China：

〃In　any　Church。　　Sec。　　2。　　The　Pastor　Emeritus　of　the　Mother…Church　shall
have　the　right　（through　a　letter　addressed　to　the　individual　and　Church
of　which　he　is　the　Reader）　to　remove　a　Reader　from　this　office　in　any
Church　of　Christ；　Scientist；　both　in　America　and　in　foreign　nations；　or
to　appoint　the　Reader　to　fill　any　office　belonging　to　the　Christian
Science　denomination。〃

She　does　not　have　to　prefer　charges　against　him；　she　does　not　have　to
find　him　lazy；　careless；　incompetent；　untidy；　ill…mannered；　unholy；
dishonest；　she　does　not　have　to　discover　a　fault　of　any　kind　in　him；　she
does　not　have　to　tell　him　nor　his　congregation　why　she　dismisses　and
disgraces　him　and　insults　his　meek　flock；　she　does　not　have　to　explain　to
his　family　why　she　takes　the　bread　out　of　their　mouths　and　turns　them
out…of…doors　homeless　and　ashamed　in　a　strange　land；　she　does　not　have　to
do　anything　but　send　a　letter　and　say：　〃Pack！　and　ask　no　questions！〃

Has　the　Pope　this　power？　　the　other　Pope　the　one　in　Rome。　　Has　he
anything　approaching　it？　　Can　he　turn　a　priest　out　of　his　pulpit　and
strip　him　of　his　office　and　his　livelihood　just　upon　a　whim；　a　caprice；
and　meanwhile　furnishing　no　reasons　to　the　parish？　　Not　in　America。　　And
not　elsewhere；　we　may　believe。

It　is　odd　and　strange；　to　see　intelligent　and　educated　people　among　us
worshipping　this　self…seeking　and　remorseless　tyrant　as　a　God。　　This
worship　is　deniedby　persons　who　are　themselves　worshippers　of　Mrs。
Eddy。　　I　feel　quite　sure　that　it　is　a　worship　which　will　continue　during
ages。

That　Mrs。　Eddy　wrote　that　amazing　By…law　with　her　own　hand　we　have　much
better　evidence　than　her　word。　　We　have　her　English。　　It　is　there。　　It
cannot　be　imitated。　　She　ought　never　to　go　to　the　expense　of　copyrighting
her　verbal　discharges。　　When　any　one　tries　to　claim　them　she　should　call
me；　I　can　always　tell　them　from　any　other　literary　apprentice's　at　a
glance。　　It　was　like　her　to　call　America　a　〃nation〃；　she　would　call　a
sand…bar　a　nation　if　it　should　fall　into　a　sentence　in　which　she　was
speaking　of　peoples；　for　she　would　not　know　how　to　untangle　it　and　get　it
out　and　classify　it　by　itself。　　And　the　closing　arrangement　of　that　By…
law　is　in　true　Eddysonian　form；　too。　　In　it　she　reserves　authority　to
make　a　Reader　fill　any　office　connected　with　a　Science　church…sexton；
grave…digger；　advertising…agent；　Annex…polisher；　leader　of　the　choir；
President；　Director；　Treasurer；　Clerk；　etc。　　She　did　not　mean　that。　　She
already　possessed　that　authority。　　She　meant　to　clothe　herself　with
power；　despotic　and　unchallengeable；　to　appoint　all　Science　Readers　to
their　offices；　both　at　home　and　abroad。　　The　phrase　〃or　to　appoint〃　is
another　miscarriage　of　intention；　she　did　not　mean　〃or；〃　she　meant　〃and。〃


That　By…law　puts　into　Mrs。　Eddy's　hands　absolute　command　over　the　most
formidable　force　and　influence　existent　in　the　Christian　Science　kingdom
outside　of　herself；　and　it　does　this　unconditionally　and　（by　auxiliary
force　of　Laws　already　quoted）　irrevocably。　　Still；　she　is　not　quite
satisfied。　　Something　might　happen；　she　doesn't　know　what。　　Therefore　she
dri