memories and portraits-第7章

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there　was　no　good　in　repeating　the　experiment；　if　they　had　been　

looked　at　…　well；　then　I　had　not　yet　learned　to　write；　and　I　must　

keep　on　learning　and　living。　　Lastly；　I　had　a　piece　of　good　fortune　

which　is　the　occasion　of　this　paper；　and　by　which　I　was　able　to　see　

my　literature　in　print；　and　to　measure　experimentally　how　far　I　

stood　from　the　favour　of　the　public。





II





The　Speculative　Society　is　a　body　of　some　antiquity；　and　has　

counted　among　its　members　Scott；　Brougham；　Jeffrey；　Horner；　

Benjamin　Constant；　Robert　Emmet；　and　many　a　legal　and　local　

celebrity　besides。　　By　an　accident；　variously　explained；　it　has　its　

rooms　in　the　very　buildings　of　the　University　of　Edinburgh：　a　hall；　

Turkey…carpeted；　hung　with　pictures；　looking；　when　lighted　up　at　

night　with　fire　and　candle；　like　some　goodly　dining…room；　a　

passage…like　library；　walled　with　books　in　their　wire　cages；　and　a　

corridor　with　a　fireplace；　benches；　a　table；　many　prints　of　famous　

members；　and　a　mural　tablet　to　the　virtues　of　a　former　secretary。　　

Here　a　member　can　warm　himself　and　loaf　and　read；　here；　in　defiance　

of　Senatus…consults；　he　can　smoke。　　The　Senatus　looks　askance　at　

these　privileges；　looks　even　with　a　somewhat　vinegar　aspect　on　the　

whole　society；　which　argues　a　lack　of　proportion　in　the　learned　

mind；　for　the　world；　we　may　be　sure；　will　prize　far　higher　this　

haunt　of　dead　lions　than　all　the　living　dogs　of　the　professorate。



I　sat　one　December　morning　in　the　library　of　the　Speculative；　a　

very　humble…minded　youth；　though　it　was　a　virtue　I　never　had　much　

credit　for；　yet　proud　of　my　privileges　as　a　member　of　the　Spec。；　

proud　of　the　pipe　I　was　smoking　in　the　teeth　of　the　Senatus；　and　in　

particular；　proud　of　being　in　the　next　room　to　three　very　

distinguished　students；　who　were　then　conversing　beside　the　

corridor　fire。　　One　of　these　has　now　his　name　on　the　back　of　

several　volumes；　and　his　voice；　I　learn；　is　influential　in　the　law　

courts。　　Of　the　death　of　the　second；　you　have　just　been　reading　

what　I　had　to　say。



And　the　third　also　has　escaped　out　of　that　battle　of　in　which　he　

fought　so　hard；　it　may　be　so　unwisely。　　They　were　all　three；　as　I　

have　said；　notable　students；　but　this　was　the　most　conspicuous。　　

Wealthy；　handsome；　ambitious；　adventurous；　diplomatic；　a　reader　of　

Balzac；　and　of　all　men　that　I　have　known；　the　most　like　to　one　of　

Balzac's　characters；　he　led　a　life；　and　was　attended　by　an　ill　

fortune；　that　could　be　properly　set　forth　only　in　the　COMEDIE　

HUMAINE。　　He　had　then　his　eye　on　Parliament；　and　soon　after　the　

time　of　which　I　write；　he　made　a　showy　speech　at　a　political　

dinner；　was　cried　up　to　heaven　next　day　in　the　COURANT；　and　the　day　

after　was　dashed　lower　than　earth　with　a　charge　of　plagiarism　in　

the　SCOTSMAN。　　Report　would　have　it　（I　daresay；　very　wrongly）　that　

he　was　betrayed　by　one　in　whom　he　particularly　trusted；　and　that　

the　author　of　the　charge　had　learned　its　truth　from　his　own　lips。　　

Thus；　at　least；　he　was　up　one　day　on　a　pinnacle；　admired　and　envied　

by　all；　and　the　next；　though　still　but　a　boy；　he　was　publicly　

disgraced。　　The　blow　would　have　broken　a　less　finely　tempered　

spirit；　and　even　him　I　suppose　it　rendered　reckless；　for　he　took　

flight　to　London；　and　there；　in　a　fast　club；　disposed　of　the　bulk　

of　his　considerable　patrimony　in　the　space　of　one　winter。　　For　

years　thereafter　he　lived　I　know　not　how；　always　well　dressed；　

always　in　good　hotels　and　good　society；　always　with　empty　pockets。　　

The　charm　of　his　manner　may　have　stood　him　in　good　stead；　but　

though　my　own　manners　are　very　agreeable；　I　have　never　found　in　

them　a　source　of　livelihood；　and　to　explain　the　miracle　of　his　

continued　existence；　I　must　fall　back　upon　the　theory　of　the　

philosopher；　that　in　his　case；　as　in　all　of　the　same　kind；　〃there　

was　a　suffering　relative　in　the　background。〃　　From　this　genteel　

eclipse　he　reappeared　upon　the　scene；　and　presently　sought　me　out　

in　the　character　of　a　generous　editor。　　It　is　in　this　part　that　I　

best　remember　him；　tall；　slender；　with　a　not　ungraceful　stoop；　

looking　quite　like　a　refined　gentleman；　and　quite　like　an　urbane　

adventurer；　smiling　with　an　engaging　ambiguity；　cocking　at　you　one　

peaked　eyebrow　with　a　great　appearance　of　finesse；　speaking　low　and　

sweet　and　thick；　with　a　touch　of　burr；　telling　strange　tales　with　

singular　deliberation　and；　to　a　patient　listener；　excellent　effect。　　

After　all　these　ups　and　downs；　he　seemed　still；　like　the　rich　

student　that　he　was　of　yore；　to　breathe　of　money；　seemed　still　

perfectly　sure　of　himself　and　certain　of　his　end。　　Yet　he　was　then　

upon　the　brink　of　his　last　overthrow。　　He　had　set　himself　to　found　

the　strangest　thing　in　our　society：　one　of　those　periodical　sheets　

from　which　men　suppose　themselves　to　learn　opinions；　in　which　young　

gentlemen　from　the　universities　are　encouraged；　at　so　much　a　line；　

to　garble　facts；　insult　foreign　nations　and　calumniate　private　

individuals；　and　which　are　now　the　source　of　glory；　so　that　if　a　

man's　name　be　often　enough　printed　there；　he　becomes　a　kind　of　

demigod；　and　people　will　pardon　him　when　he　talks　back　and　forth；　

as　they　do　for　Mr。　Gladstone；　and　crowd　him　to　suffocation　on　

railway　platforms；　as　they　did　the　other　day　to　General　Boulanger；　

and　buy　his　literary　works；　as　I　hope　you　have　just　done　for　me。　　

Our　fathers；　when　they　were　upon　some　great　enterprise；　would　

sacrifice　a　life；　building；　it　may　be；　a　favourite　slave　into　the　

foundations　of　their　palace。　　It　was　with　his　own　life　that　my　

companion　disarmed　the　envy　of　the　gods。　　He　fought　his　paper　

single…handed；　trusting　no　one；　for　he　was　something　of　a　cynic；　up　

early　and　down　late；　for　he　was　nothing　of　a　sluggard；　daily　ear…

wigging　influential　men；　for　he　was　a　master　of　ingratiation。　　In　

that　slender　and　silken　fellow　there　must　have　been　a　rare　vein　of　

courage；　that　he　should　thus　have　died　at　his　employment；　and　

doubtless　ambition　spoke　loudly　in　his　ear；　and　doubtless　love　

also；　for　it　seems　there　was　a　marriage　in　his　view　had　he　

succeeded。　　But　he　died；　and　his　paper　died　after　him；　and　of　all　

this　grace；　and　tact；　and　courage；　it　must　seem　to　our　blind　eyes　

as　if　there　had　come　literally　nothing。



These　three　students　sat；　as　I　was　saying；　in　the　corridor；　under　

the　mural　tablet　that　records　the　virtues　of　Macbean；　the　former　

secretary。　　We　would　often　smile　at　that　ineloquent　memorial　and　

thought　it　a　poor　thing　to　come　into　the　world　at　all　and　have　no　

more　behind　one　than　Macbean。　　And　yet　of　these　three；　two　are　gone　

and　have　left　less；　and　this　book；　perhaps；　when　it　is　old　and　

foxy；　and　some　one　picks　it　up　in　a　corner　of　a　book…shop；　and　

glances　through　it；　smiling　at　the　old；　graceless　turns　of　speech；　

and　perhaps　for　the　love　of　ALMA　MATER　（which　may　be　still　extant　

and　flourishing）　buys　it；　not　without　haggling；　for　some　pence　…　

this　book　may　alone　preserve　a　memory　of　James　Walter　Ferrier　and　

Robert　Glasgow　Brown。



Their　thoughts　ran　very　differently　on　that　December　morning；　they　

were　all　on　fire　with　ambition；　and　when　they　had　called　me　in　to　

them；　and　made　me　a　sharer　in　their　design；　I　too　became　drunken　

with　pride　and　hope。　　We　were　to　found　a　University　magazine。　　A　

pair　of　little；　active　brothers　…　Livingstone　by　name；　great　

skippers　on　the　foot；　great　rubbers　of　the　hands；　who　kept　a　book…

shop　over　against　the　University　building　…　had　been　debauched　to　

play　the　part　of　publishers。　　We　four　were　to　be　conjunct　editors　

and；　what　was　the　main　point　of　the　concern；　to　print　our　own　

works；　while；　by　every　rule　of　arithmetic　…　that　flatterer　of　

credulity　…　the　adventure　must　succeed　and　bring　great　profit。　　

Well；　well：　it　was　a　bright　vision。　　I　went　home　that　morning　

walking　upon　air。　　To　have　been　chosen　by　these　three　distinguished　

students　was　to　me　the　most　unspeakable　advance；　it　was　my　first　

draught　of　consideration；　it　reconciled　me　to　myself　and　to　my　

fellow…men；　and　as　I　steered　round　the　railings　at　the　Tron；　I　

could　not　withhold　my　lips　from　smiling　publicly。　　Yet；　in　the　

bottom　of　my　heart；　I　knew　that　magazine　would　be　a　grim　fiasco；　I　

knew　it　would　not　be　worth　reading；　I　knew；　even　if　it　were；　that　

nobody　would　read　it；　and　I　kept　wondering　how　I　should　be　able；　

upon　my　compact　income　of　twelve　pounds　per　annum；　payable　monthly；　

to　meet　my　share　in　the　expense。　　It　was　a　comfortable　thought　to　

me　that　I　had　a　father。



The　magazine　appeared；　in　a　yellow　cover；　which　was　the　best　part　

of　it；　for　at　least　it　was　unassuming；　it　ran　four　months　in　

undisturbed　obscurity；　and　died　without　a　gasp。　　The　first　number　

was　edited　by　all　four　of　us　with　prodigious　bustle；　the　second　

fell　principally　into　the　hands　of　Ferrier　and　me；　the　third　I　

edited　alone；　and　it　has　long　been　a　solemn　question　who　it　was　

that　edited　the　fourth。　　It　would　perhaps　be　still　more　difficult　

to　say　who　read　it。　　Poor　yellow　sheet；　that　looked　so　hopefully　

Livingtones'　window！　　Poor；　harmless　paper；　that　might　have　gone　to　

print　a　SHAKESPEARE　on；　and　was　instead　so　clumsily　defaced　with　

nonsense；　And；　shall　I　say；　Poor　Editors？　　I　cannot　pity　myself；　to　

whom　it　was　all　pure　gain。　　It　was　no　news　to　me；　but　only　the　

wholesome　confirmation　of　my　judgment；　when　the　magazine　struggled　

into　half…birth；　and　instantly　sickened　and　subsided　into　night。　　I　

had　sent　a　copy　to　the　lady　with　whom　my　heart　was　at　that　time　

somewhat　engaged；　and　who　did　all　that　in　her　lay　to　break　it；　and　

she；　with　some　tact；　passed　over　the　gift　and　my　cherished　

contributions　in　silence。　　I　will　not　say　that　I　was　pleased　at　

this；　but　I　will　tell　her　now；　if　by　any　chance　she　takes　up　the　

work　of　her　former　servant；　that　I　thought　the　better　of　her　taste。　　

I　cleared　the　decks　after　this　lost　engagement；　had　the　necessary　

interview　with　my　father；　which　passed　off　not　amiss；　paid　over　my　

share　of　the　expense　to　the　two　little；　active　brothers；　who　rubbed　

their　hands　as　much；　but　methought　skipped　rather　less　than　

formerly；　having　perhaps；　these　two　also；　embarked　upon　the　

enterprise　with　some　graceful　illusions；　and　then；　reviewing　the　

whole　episode；　I　told　myself　that　the　time　was　not　yet　ripe；　nor　

the　man　ready；　and　to　work　I　went　again　with　my　penny　version…

books；　having　fallen　back　in　one　day　from　the　printed　author　to　the　

manuscript　student。





III





From　this　defunct　periodical　I　am　going　to　reprint　one　of　my　own　

papers。　　The　poor　little　piece　is　all　tail…foremost。　　I　have　done　

my　best　to　straighten　its　array；　I　have　pruned　it　fearlessly；　and　

it　remains　invertebrate　and　wordy。　　No　self…respecting　magazine　

would　print　the　thing；　and　here　you　behold　it　in　a　bound　volume；　

not　for　any　worth　of　its　own；　but　for　the　sake　of　the　man　whom　it　

purports　dimly　to　represent