fraternity-第40章

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！



〃At　the　end　of　the　week；　I　think。〃

Noting　his　eyes　fixed　on　her；　she　added：

〃Yes；　we're　neither　of　us　looking　quite　our　best。〃

〃I　am　sorry。〃

〃I　know　you　are。〃

This　had　been　all。　　It　had　been　sufficient　to　bring　Hilary　once　more　face　to　face　with　the　situation。

Its　constituent　elements　remained　the　same；　relative　values　had　much　changed。　　The　temptations　of　St。　Anthony　were　becoming　more　poignant　every　hour。　　He　had　no　〃principles〃　to　pit　against　them：　he　had　merely　the　inveterate　distaste　for　hurting　anybody；　and　a　feeling　that　if　he　yielded　to　his　inclination　he　would　be　faced　ultimately　with　a　worse　situation　than　ever。　　It　was　not　possible　for　him　to　look　at　the　position　as　Mr。　Purcey　might　have　done；　if　his　wife　had　withdrawn　from　him　and　a　girl　had　put　herself　in　his　way。　　Neither　hesitation　because　of　the　defenceless　position　of　the　girl；　nor　hesitation　because　of　his　own　future　with　her；　would　have　troubled　Mr。　Purcey。　　Hegood　manin　his　straightforward　way；　would　have　only　thought　about　the　presentnot；　indeed；　intending　to　have　a　future　with　a　young　person　of　that　class。　　Consideration　for　a　wife　who　had　withdrawn　from　the　society　of　Mr。　Purcey　would　also　naturally　have　been　absent　from　the　equation。　　That　Hilary　worried　over　all　these　questions　was　the　mark　of　his　'fin　de　sieclism。'　　And　in　the　meantime　the　facts　demanded　a　decision。

He　had　not　spoken　to　this　girl　since　the　day　of　the　baby's　funeral；　but　in　that　long　look　from　the　garden　he　had　in　effect　said：　'You　are　drawing　me　to　the　only　sort　of　union　possible　to　us！'　　And　she　in　effect　had　answered：　'Do　what　you　like　with　me！'

There　were　other　facts；　too；　to　be　reckoned　with。　　Hughs　would　be　released　to…morrow；　the　little　model　would　not　stop　her　visits　unless　forced　to；　Mr。　Stone　could　not　well　do　without　her；　Bianca　had　in　effect　declared　that　she　was　being　driven　out　of　her　own　house。　　It　was　this　situation　which　Hilary；　seated　beneath　the　bust　of　Socrates；　turned　over　and　over　in　his　mind。　　Long　and　painful　reflection　brought　him　back　continually　to　the　thought　that　he　himself；　and　not　Bianca；　had　better　go　away。　　He　was　extremely　bitter　and　contemptuous　towards　himself　that　he　had　not　done　so　long　ago。　　He　made　use　of　the　names　Martin　had　given　him。　　〃Hamlet；〃　〃Amateur；〃　〃Invertebrate。〃　They　gave　him；　unfortunately；　little　comfort。

In　the　afternoon　he　received　a　visit。　　Mr。　Stone　came　in　with　his　osier　fruit…bag　in　his　hand。　　He　remained　standing；　and　spoke　at　once。

〃Is　my　daughter　happy？〃

At　this　unexpected　question　Hilary　walked　over　to　the　fireplace。

〃No；〃　he　said　at　last；　〃I　am　afraid　she　is　not。〃

〃Why？〃

Hilary　was　silent；　then；　facing　the　old　man；　he　said：

〃I　think　she　will　be　glad；　for　certain　reasons；　if　I　go　away　for　a　time。〃

〃When　are　you　going？〃　　asked　Mr。　Stone。

〃As　soon　as　I　can。〃

Mr。　Stone's　eyes；　wistfully　bright；　seemed　trying　to　see　through　heavy　fog。

〃She　came　to　me；　I　think；〃　he　said；　〃I　seem　to　recollect　her　crying。　You　are　good　to　her？〃

〃I　have　tried　to　be；〃　said　Hilary。

Mr。　Stone's　face　was　discoloured　by　a　flush。　　〃You　have　no　children；〃　he　said　painfully；　〃do　you　live　together？〃

Hilary　shook　his　head。

〃You　are　estranged？〃　　said　Mr。　Stone。

Hilary　bowed。　　There　was　a　long　silence。　　Mr。　Stone's　eyes　had　travelled　to　the　window。

〃Without　love　there　cannot　be　life；〃　he　said　at　last；　and　fixing　his　wistful　gaze　on　Hilary；　asked：　〃Does　she　love　another？〃

Again　Hilary　shook　his　head。

When　Mr。　Stone　next　spoke　it　was　clearly　to　himself。

〃I　do　not　know　why　I　am　glad。　　Do　you　love　another？〃

At　this　question　Hilary's　eyebrows　settled　in　a　frown。　　〃What　do　you　mean　by　love？〃　　he　said。

Mr。　Stone　did　not　reply；　it　was　evident　that　he　was　reflecting　deeply。　　His　lips　began　to　move：　〃By　love　I　mean　the　forgetfulness　of　self。　　Unions　are　frequent　in　which　only　the　sexual　instincts；　or　the　remembrance　of　self；　are　roused…〃

〃That　is　true；〃　muttered　Hilary。

Mr。　Stone　looked　up；　painful　traces　of　confusion　showed　in　his　face。

〃We　were　discussing　something。〃

〃I　was　telling　you；〃　said　Hilary；　〃that　it　would　be　better　for　your　daughterif　I　go　away　for　a　time。〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Mr。　Stone；　〃you　are　estranged。〃

Hilary　went　back　to　his　stand　before　the　empty　fireplace。

〃There　is　one　thing；　sir；〃　he　said；　〃on　my　conscience　to　say　before　I　go；　and　I　must　leave　it　to　you　to　decide。　　The　little　girl　who　comes　to　you　no　longer　lives　where　she　used　to　live。〃

〃In　that　street。。。。〃　　said　Mr。　Stone。

Hilary　went　on　quickly。　　〃She　was　obliged　to　leave　because　the　husband　of　the　woman　with　whom　she　used　to　lodge　became　infatuated　with　her。　　He　has　been　in　prison；　and　comes　out　tomorrow。　　If　she　continues　to　come　here　he　will；　of　course；　be　able　to　find　her。　　I'm　afraid　he　will　pursue　her　again。　　Have　I　made　it　clear　to　you？〃

〃No；〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

〃The　man；〃　resumed　Hilary　patiently；　〃is　a　poor；　violent　creature；　who　has　been　wounded　in　the　head；　he　is　not　quite　responsible。　　He　may　do　the　girl　an　injury。〃

〃What　injury？〃

〃He　has　stabbed　his　wife　already。〃

〃I　will　speak　to　him；〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

Hilary　smiled。　　〃I　am　afraid　that　words　will　hardly　meet　the　case。　She　ought　to　disappear。〃

There　was　silence。

〃My　book！〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

It　smote　Hilary　to　see　how　white　his　face　had　become。　　'It's　better；'　he　thought；　'to　bring　his　will…power　into　play；　she　will　never　come　here；　anyway；　after　I'm　gone。'

But；　unable　to　bear　the　tragedy　in　the　old　man's　eyes；　he　touched　him　on　the　arm。

〃Perhaps　she　will　take　the　risk；　sir；　if　you　ask　her。〃

Mr。　Stone　did　not　answer；　and；　not　knowing　what　more　to　say；　Hilary　went　back　to　the　window。　　Miranda　was　slumbering　lightly　out　there　in　the　speckled　shade；　where　it　was　not　too　warm　and　not　too　cold；　her　cheek　resting　on　her　paw　and　white　teeth　showing。

Mr。　Stone's　voice　rose　again。　　〃You　are　right；　I　cannot　ask　her　to　run　a　risk　like　that！〃

〃She　is　just　coming　up　the　garden；〃　Hilary　said　huskily。　　〃Shall　I　tell　her　to　come　in？〃

〃Yes；〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

Hilary　beckoned。

The　girl　came　in；　carrying　a　tiny　bunch　of　lilies　of　the　valley；　her　face　fell　at　sight　of　Mr。　Stone；　she　stood　still；　raising　the　lilies　to　her　breast。　　Nothing　could　have　been　more　striking　than　the　change　from　her　look　of　guttered　expectancy　to　a　sort　of　hard　dismay。　　A　spot　of　red　came　into　both　her　cheeks。　　She　gazed　from　Mr。　Stone　to　Hilary　and　back　again。　　Both　were　staring　at　her。　　No　one　spoke。　　The　little　model's　bosom　began　heaving　as　though　she　had　been　running；　she　said　faintly：　〃Look；　I　brought　you　this；　Mr。　Stone！〃　and　held　out　to　him　the　bunch　of　lilies。　　But　Mr。　Stone　made　no　sign。　　〃Don't　you　like　them？〃

Mr。　Stone's　eyes　remained　fastened　on　her　face。

To　Hilary　this　suspense　was；　evidently；　most　distressing。　　〃Come；　will　you　tell　her；　sir；〃　he　said；　〃or　shall　I？〃

Mr。　Stone　spoke。

〃I　shall　try　and　write　my　book　without　you。　　You　must　not　run　this　risk。　　I　cannot　allow　it。〃

The　little　model　turned　her　eyes　from　side　to　side。　　〃But　I　like　to　copy　out　your　book；〃　she　said。

〃The　man　will　injure　you；〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

The　little　model　looked　at　Hilary。

〃I　don't　care　if　he　does；　I'm　not　afraid　of　him。　　I　can　look　after　myself；　I'm　used　to　it。〃

〃I　am　going　away；〃　said　Hilary　quietly。

After　a　desperate　look；　that　seemed　to　ask；　'Am　I　going；　too？'　the　little　model　stood　as　though　frozen。

Wishing　to　end　the　painful　scene；　Hilary　went　up　to　Mr。　Stone。

〃Do　you　want　to　dictate　to　her　this　afternoon；　sir？〃

〃No；〃　said　Mr。　Stone。

〃Nor　to…morrow？〃

〃Will　you　come　a　little　walk　with　me？〃

Mr。　Stone　bowed。

Hilary　turned　to　the　little　model。　　〃It　is　goodbye；　then；〃　he　said。

She　did　not　take　his　hand。　　Her　eyes；　turned　sideways；　glinted；　her　teeth　were　fastened　on　her　lower　lip。　　She　dropped　the　lilies；　suddenly　looked　up　at　him；　gulped；　and　slunk　away。　　In　passing　she　had　smeared　the　lilies　with　her　foot。

Hilary　picked　up　the　fragments　of　the　flowers；　and　dropped　them　into　the　grate。　　The　fragrance　of　the　bruised　blossoms　remained　clinging　to　the　air。

〃Shall　we　get　ready　for　our　walk？〃　　he　said。

Mr。　Stone　moved　feebly　to　the　door；　and　very　soon　they　were　walking　silently　towards　the　Gardens。




CHAPTER　XXXIV

THYME'S　ADVENTURE

This　same　afternoon　Thyme；　wheeling　a　bicycle　and　carrying　a　light　valise；　was　slipping　into　a　back　street　out　of　the　Old　Square。　Putting　her　burden　down　at　the　pavement's　edge；　she　blew　a　whistle。　A　hansom…cab　appeared；　and　a　man　in　ragged　clothes；　who　seemed　to　spring　out　of　the　pavement；　took　hold　of　her　valise。　　His　lean；　unshaven　face　was　full　of　wolfish　misery。

〃Get　off　with　you！〃　the　cabman　said。

〃Let　him　do　it！〃　murmured　Thyme。

The　cab…runner　hoisted　up　the　trunk；　then　waited　motionless　beside　the　cab。

Thyme　handed　him　two　coppers。　　He　looked　at　them　in　silence；　and　went　away。

'Poor　man；'　she　thought；　'that's　one　of　the　things　we've　got　to　do　away　with！'

The　cab　now　proceeded　in　the　direction　of　the　Park；　Thyme　following　on　her　bicycle；　and　trying　to　stare　about　her　calmly。

'This；'　she　thought；　'is　the　end　of　the　old　life。　　I　won't　be　romantic；　and　imagine　I'm　doing　anything　special；　I　must　take　it　all　as　a　matter　of　course。'　　She　thought　of　Mr。　Purcey's　face'that　person！'if　he　could　have　seen　her　at　this　moment　turning　her　back　on　comfort。　　'The　moment　I　get　there；'　she　mused；　'I　shall　let　mother　know；　she　can　come　out　to…morrow；　and　see　for　herself。　　I　can't　have　hysterics　about　my　disappearance；　and　all　that。　　They　must　get　used　to　the　idea　that　I　mean　to　be　in　touch　with　things。　　I　can't　be　stopped　by　what　anybody　thinks！'

An　approaching　motor…car　brought　a　startled　frown　across　her　brow。　Was　it　'that　person'？　　But　though　it　was　not　Mr。　Purcey　and　his　A。i。　Damyer；　it　was　somebody　so　like　him　as　made　no　difference。　　Thyme　uttered　a　little　laugh。

In　the　Park　a　cool　light　danced　and　glittered　on　the　trees　and　water；　and　the　same　cool；　dancing　glitter　seemed　lighting　the　girl's　eyes。

The　cabman；　unseen；　took　an　admiring　look　at　her。　　'Nice　little　bit；　this！'　it　said。

'Grandfather　bathes　here；'　thought　Thyme。　　'Poor　darling！　　I　pity　everyone　that's　old。'

The　cab　passed　on　under　the　shade　of　trees　out　into　the　road。

'I　wonder　if　we　have　only　one　self　in　us；'　thought　Thyme。　'I　sometimes　feel　that　I　have　twoUncle　Hilary　would　understand　what　I　mean。　　The　pavements　are　beginning　to　smell　horrid　already；　and　it's　only　June　to…morrow。　　Will　mother　feel　my　going　very　much？　　How　glorious　if　one　didn't　feel！'

The　cab　turned　into　a　narrow　street　of　little　shops。

'It　must　be　dreadful　to　have　to　serve　in　a　small　shop。　　What　millions　of　people　there　are　in　the　world！　　Can　anything　be　of　any　use？　Martin　says　what　matters　is　to　do　one's　job；　but　what　is　one's　job？'

The　cab　emerged　into　a　broad；　quiet　square。

'But　I'm　not　going　to　think　of　anything；'　thought　Thyme；　'that's　fatal。　　Suppose　father　stops　my　allowance；　I　should　have　to　earn　my　living　as　a　typist；　or　something　of　that　sort；　but　he　won't；　when　he　sees　I　mean　it。　　Besides；　mother　wouldn't　let　him。'

The　cab　entered　the　Euston　Road；　and　again　the　cabman's　broad　face　was　turned　towards　Thyme　with　an　inquiring　stare。

'What　a　hateful　road！'　Thyme　thought。