poor miss finch-第35章

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have　nothing　more　to　say　to　each　other。　What　has　she　come　back　for？　Why
don't　you　answer？　This　is　infamous！　I　shall　leave　the　room！〃

The　utterance　of　that　final　threat　was　followed　so　rapidly　by　its
execution　that；　before　Nugent　（standing　between　her　and　the　door）　could
get　out　of　her　way；　she　came　in　violent　contact　with　him。　She　instantly
caught　him　by　the　arm；　and　shook　him　angrily。　〃What　does　your　silence
mean？　Is　it　at　Madame　Pratolungo's　instigation　that　you　are　insulting
me？〃

I　had　just　opened　my　lips　to　make　one　more　attempt　at　reconciliation；　by
saying　some　pacifying　words　to　herwhen　she　planted　that　last　sting　in
me。　French　flesh　and　blood　（whatever　English　flesh　and　blood　might　have
done）　could　bear　no　more。　I　silently　turned　my　back　on　her；　in　a　rage。

At　the　same　moment；　Nugent's　eyes　brightened　as　if　a　new　idea　had　struck
him。　He　gave　me　one　significant　lookand　answered　her　in　his　brother's
character。　Whether　he　was　possessed　at　the　moment　by　some　demon　of
mischief；　or　whether　he　had　the　idea　of　trying　to　make　Oscar's　peace　for
him；　before　Oscar　returnedwas　more　than　I　could　say　at　the　time。　I
ought　to　have　stopped　itI　know。　But　my　temper　was　in　a　flame。　I　was　as
spiteful　as　a　cat　and　as　fierce　as　a　bear。　I　said　to　myself　（in　your
English　idiom）；　She　wants　taking　down　a　peg；　quite　right；　Mr。　Nugent；　do
it。　Shocking！　shameful！　no　words　are　bad　enough　for　me：　give　it　me　well。
Ah；　Heaven！　what　is　a　human　being　in　a　rage？　On　my　sacred　word　of　honor；
nothing　but　a　human　beast！　The　next　time　it　happens　to　You；　look　at
yourself　in　the　glass；　and　you　will　find　your　soul　gone　out　of　you　at
your　face；　and　nothing　left　but　an　animaland　a　bad；　a　villainous　bad
animal　too！

〃You　ask　what　my　silence　means？〃　said　Nugent。

He　had　only　to　model　his　articulation　on　his　brother's　slower　manner　of
speaking　as　distinguished　from　his　own；　to　be　his　brother　himself。　In
saying　those　few　first　words；　he　did　it　so　dexterously　that　I　could　have
swornif　I　had　not　seen　him　standing　before　meOscar　was　in　the　room。

〃Yes；〃　she　said；　〃I　ask　that。〃

〃I　am　silent；〃　he　answered；　〃because　I　am　waiting。〃

〃What　are　you　waiting　for？〃

〃To　hear　you　make　your　apologies　to　Madame　Pratolungo。〃

She　started　back　a　step。　Submissive　Oscar　was　taking　a　peremptory　tone
with　her　for　the　first　time　in　his　life。　Submissive　Oscar；　instead　of
giving　her　time　to　speak；　sternly　went　on。

〃Madame　Pratolungo　has　made　her　excuses　to　_you。_　You　ought　to　receive
them；　you　ought　to　reciprocate　them。　It　is　distressing　to　see　you　and
hear　you。　You　are　behaving　ungratefully　to　your　best　friend。〃

She　raised　her　face；　she　raised　her　hands；　in　blank　amazement：　she　looked
as　if　she　distrusted　her　own　ears。

〃Oscar！〃　she　exclaimed。

〃Here　I　am；〃　said　Oscar；　opening　the　door　at　the　same　moment。

She　turned　like　lightning　towards　the　place　from　which　he　had　spoken。　She
detected　the　deception　which　Nugent　had　practiced　on　her；　with　a　cry　of
indignation　that　rang　through　the　room。

Oscar　ran　to　her　in　alarm。　She　thrust　him　back　violently。

〃A　trick！〃　she　cried。　〃A　mean；　vile；　cowardly　trick　played　upon　my
blindness！　Oscar！　your　brother　has　been　imitating　you；　your　brother　has
been　speaking　to　me　in　your　voice。　And　that　woman　who　calls　herself　my
friendthat　woman　stood　by　and　heard　him；　and　never　told　me。　She
encouraged　it：　she　enjoyed　it。　The　wretches！　take　me　away　from　them。　They
are　capable　of　any　deceit。　She　always　hated　you；　dear；　from　the
firstshe　took　up　with　your　brother　the　moment　he　came　here。　When　you
marry　me；　it　mustn't　be　at　Dimchurch；　it　must　be　in　some　place　they　don't
know　of。　There　is　a　conspiracy　between　them　against　you　and　against　me。
Beware　of　them！　beware　of　them！　She　said　I　should　have　fallen　in　love
with　your　brother；　if　I　had　met　him　first。　There　is　a　deeper　meaning　in
that；　my　love；　than　you　can　see。　It　means　that　they　will　part　us　if　they
can。　Ha！　I　hear　somebody　moving！　Has　he　changed　places　with　you？　Is　it
_you_　whom　I　am　speaking　to　now？　Oh；　my　blindness！　my　blindness！　Oh；　God；
of　all　your　creatures；　the　most　helpless；　the　most　miserable；　is　the
creature　who　can't　see！〃

I　never　heard　anything　in　all　my　life　so　pitiable　and　so　dreadful　as　the
frantic　suspicion　and　misery　which　tore　their　way　out　from　her；　in　those
words。　She　cut　me　to　the　heart。　I　had　spoken　rashlyI　had　behaved
badlybut　had　I　deserved　this？　No！　no！　no！　I　had　_not_　deserved　it。　I
threw　myself　into　a　chair；　and　burst　out　crying。　My　tears　scalded　me；　my
sobs　choked　me。　If　I　had　had　poison　in　my　hand；　I　would　have　drunk　itI
was　so　furious　and　so　wretched：　so　hurt　in　my　honor；　so　wounded　at　my
heart。

The　only　voice　that　answered　her　was　Nugent's。　Reckless　what　the
consequences　might　bespeaking；　in　his　own　proper　person；　from　the
opposite　end　of　the　roomhe　asked　the　all…important　question　which　no
human　being　had　ever　put　to　her　yet。

〃Are　you　sure；　Lucilla；　that　you　are　blind　for　life？〃

A　dead　silence　followed　the　utterance　of　those　words。

I　brushed　away　the　tears　from　my　eyes；　and　looked　up。

Oscar　had　beenas　I　supposedholding　her　in　his　arms；　silently　soothing
her；　when　his　brother　spoke。　At　the　moment　when　I　saw　her；　she　had　just
detached　herself　from　him。　She　advanced　a　step；　towards　the　part　of　the
room　in　which　Nugent　stoodand　stopped；　with　her　face　turned　towards
him。　Every　faculty　in　her　seemed　to　be　suspended　by　the　silent　passage
into　her　mind　of　the　new　idea　that　he　had　called　up。　Through　childhood；
girlhood；　womanhoodnever　once；　waking　or　dreaming；　had　the　prospect　of
restoration　to　sight　presented　itself　within　her　range　of　contemplation；
until　now。　Not　a　trace　was　left　in　her　countenance　of　the　indignation
which　Nugent　had　roused　in　her；　hardly　more　than　a　moment　since。　Not　a
sign　appeared　indicating　a　return　of　the　nervous　suffering　which　the
sense　of　his　presence　had　inflicted　on　her；　earlier　in　the　day。　The　one
emotion　in　possession　of　her　was　astonishmentastonishment　that　had
struck　her　dumb；　astonishment　that　waited；　helplessly　and　mechanically；
to　hear　more。

I　observed　Oscar；　next。　His　eyes　were　fixed　on　Lucillaabsorbed　in
watching　her。　He　spoke　to　Nugent；　without　looking　at　him；　animated；　as　it
seemed；　by　a　vague　fear　for　Lucilla；　which　was　slowly　developing　into　a
vague　fear　for　himself

〃Mind　what　you　are　doing！〃　he　said。　〃Look　at　her；　Nugentlook　at　her。〃

Nugent　approached　his　brother；　circuitously；　so　as　to　place　Oscar　between
Lucilla　and　himself。

〃Have　I　offended　you？〃　he　asked。

Oscar　looked　at　him　in　surprise。　〃Offended　with　you；〃　he　answered；　〃after
what　you　have　forgiven；　and　what　you　have　suffered；　for　my　sake？〃

〃Still；〃　persisted　the　other；　〃there　is　something　wrong。〃

〃I　am　startled；　Nugent。〃

〃Startledby　what？〃

〃By　the　question　you　have　just　put　to　Lucilla。〃

〃You　will　understand　me；　and　she　will　understand　me；　directly。〃

While　those　words　were　passing　between　the　brothers；　my　attention
remained　fixed　on　Lucilla。　Her　head　had　turned　slowly　towards　the　new
position　which　Nugent　occupied　when　he　spoke　to　Oscar。　With　this
exception；　no　other　movement　had　escaped　her。　No　sense　of　what　the　two
men　were　saying　to　each　other　seemed　to　have　entered　her　mind。　To　all
appearance　she　had　heard　nothing；　since　Nugent　had　started　the　first
doubt　in　her　whether　she　was　blind　for　life。

〃Speak　to　her；〃　I　said。　〃For　God's　sake；　don't　keep　her　in　suspense；
_now！_〃

Nugent　spoke。

〃You　have　had　reason　to　be　offended　with　me；　Lucilla。　Let　me；　if　I　can；
give　you　reason　to　be　grateful　to　me；　before　I　have　done。　When　I　was　in
New　York；　I　became　acquainted　with　a　German　surgeon；　who　had　made　a
reputation　and　a　fortune　in　America　by　his　skill　in　treating　diseases　of
the　eye。　He　had　been　especially　successful　in　curing　cases　of　blindness
given　up　as　hopeless　by　other　surgeons。　I　mentioned　your　case　to　him。　He
could　say　nothing　positively　（as　a　matter　of　course）　without　examining
you。　All　he　could　do　was　to　place　his　services　at　my　disposal；　when　he
came　to　England。　I　for　one；　Lucilla；　decline　to　consider　you　blind　for
life；　until　this　skillful　man　sees　no　more　hope　for　you　than　the　English
surgeons　have　seen。　If　there　is　the　faintest　chance　still　left　of
restoring　your　sight；　his　is；　I　firmly　believe；　the　one　hand　that　can　do
it。　He　is　now　in　England。　Say　the　wordand　I　will　bring　him　to
Dimchurch。〃

She　slowly　lifted　her　hands　to　her　head；　and　held　it　as　if　she　was
holding　her　reason　in　its　place。　Her　color　changed　from　pale　to　redfrom
red　to　pale　once　more。　She　drew　a　long；　deep；　heavy　breathand　dropped
her　hands　again；　recovering　from　the　shock。　The　change　that　followed；
held　us　all　three　breathless。　It　was　beautiful　to　see　her。　It　was　awful
to　see　her。　A　mute　ecstasy　of　hope　transfigured　her　face；　a　heavenly
smile　played　serenely　on　her　lips。　She　was　among　us；　and　yet　apart　from
us。　In　the　still　light　of　evening；　shining　in　on　her　from　the　window；　she
stood　absorbed　in　her　own　rapturethe　silent　creature　of　another　sphere！
There　was　a　moment　when　she　overcame　me　with　admiration；　and　another
moment　when　she　overcame　me　with　fear。　Both　the　men　felt　it。　Both　signed
to　me　to　speak　to　her　first。

I　advanced　a　few　steps。　I　tried　to　consider　with　myself　what　I　should
say。　It　was　useless。　I　could　neither　think　nor　speak。　I　could　only　look
at　her。　I　could　only　say；　nervously

〃Lucilla！〃

She　came　back　to　the　worldshe　came　back　to　_us_with　a　little　start；
and　a　faint　flush　of　color　in　her　cheeks。　She　turned　herself　towards　the
place　from　which　I　had　spoken；　and　whispered

〃Come！〃

In　a　moment；　my　arms　were　round　her。　Her　head　sank　on　my　bosom。　We　were
reconciled　without　a　word。　We　were　friends　again；　sisters　again；　in　an
instant。

〃Have　I　been　fainting？　have　I　been　sleeping？〃　she　said　to　me　in　low；
bewildered　tones。　〃Am　I　just　awake？　Is　this　Browndown？〃　She　suddenly
lifted　her　head。　〃Nugent！　are　you　there？〃

〃Yes。〃

She　gently　withdrew　herself　from　me；　and　approached　Nugent。

〃Did　you　speak　to　me　just　now？　Was　it　you　who　put　the　doubt　into　my　mind；
whether　I　am　really　doomed　to　be　blind　for　life？　Surely；　I　have　not
fancied　it？　Surely；　you　said　the　man　was　coming；　and　the　time　coming？〃
Her　voice　suddenly　rose。　〃The　man　who　may　cure　me！　the　time　when　I　may
see！〃

〃I　said　it；　Lucilla。　I　meant　it；　Lucilla。〃

〃Oscar！　Oscar！！　Oscar！！！〃

I　stepped　forward　to　lead　her　to　him。　Nugent　touched　me；　and　pointed　to
Oscar；　as　I　took　her　hand。　He　was　standing　before　the　glasswith　an
expression　of　despair　which　I　see　again　while　I　write　these　lineshe　was
standing　close　to　the　glass；　looking　in　silence　at　the　hideous　reflection
of　his　face。　In　sheer　pity；　I　hesitated　to　take　her　to　him。　She　stepped
forward；　and；　stretching　out　her　hand；　touched　his　shoulder。　The
reflection　of　_her_　charming　face　appeared　behind　_his_　face　in　the
glass。　She　raised　herself　on　tiptoe；　with　both　hands　on　him；　and　said；
〃The　time　is　coming；　my　darling；　when　I　may　see　You！〃

With　a　cry　of　joy；　she　drew　his　face　to　her；　and　kissed　him　on　the
forehead。　His　head　fell　on　his　breast　when　she　released　it：　he　covered
his　face　with　his　hands；　and　stifled；　for　the　moment；　all　outward
expression　of　the　pang　that　wrung　him。　I