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some roundabout papers(汎筈議猟周)-及2嫗

弌傍�� some roundabout papers(汎筈議猟周) 忖方�� 耽匈3500忖

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old Sarah Marlborough�察�and little Mr Pope�察�of Twitnam�察�died in the year of 

your birth�拭     �What a wretched memory you have�                �What�拭�haven't they a 

library�察�and the commonest books of reference at the old convent of Saint 

Lazarus�察�where you dwell�拭─�

     ;Convent of Saint Lazarus�察�Prince William�察�Dr Swift�察�Atossa�察�and Mr 

Pope�察�of Twitnam�         �What is the gentleman talking about�拭─�says old goody�察�

with a ;Ho� �ho� ─�and a laugh like a old parrot  you know they live to be 



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as    old   as   Methuselah�察      �parrots    do�察  �and    a  parrot    of   a  hundred      is 

comparatively   young   ��ho�   �ho�   �ho�。�。        Yes�察  �and   likewise   carps   live   to   an 

immense old age。         Some which Frederick the Great fed at Sans Souci are 

there now�察�with great humps of blue mould on their old backs�察                     �and they 

could tell all sorts of queer stories�察�if they chose to speak  but they are 

very silent�察�carps are  of their nature peu communicatives。 Oh� �what has 

been thy long life�察�old goody�察�but a dole of bread and water and a perch on 

a cage�察    �a dreary swim round and round a Lethe of a pond�拭                     �What are 

Rossbach       or  Jena    to  those   mouldy      ones�察  �and   do   they   know     it  is  a 

grandchild of England who brings bread to feed them�拭�

     No�     �Those Sans Souci carps may live to be a thousand years old and 

have nothing to tell but that one day is like another�察                �and the history of 

friend   Goody   Twoshoes   has   not   much   more   variety   than   theirs。          Hard 

labour�察�hard fare�察�hard bed�察�numbing cold all night�察�and gnawing hunger 

most   days。     That   is   her   lot。 Is   it   lawful   in   my   prayers   to   say�察   �Thank 

heaven�察�I am not as one of these;�拭             �If I were eighty�察�would I like to feel 

the hunger always gnawing�察�gnawing�拭�to have to get up and make a bow 

when Mr Bumble the beadle entered the common room�拭�to have to listen 

to   Miss   Prim�察  �who   came   to   give   me   her   ideas   of   the   next   world�拭�If   I 

were     eighty�察  �I  own    I  should    not  like   to  have    to  sleep   with   another 

gentleman of my own age�察�gouty�察�a bad sleeper�察�kicking in his old dreams�察�

and    snoring�察   �to  march    down     my   vale   of   years   at  word    of  command�察�

accommodating   my   tottering   old   steps   to   those   of   the   other   prisoners   in 

my dingy�察�hopeless old gang�察            �to hold out a trembling hand for a sickly 

pittance of gruel�察�and say�察 �Thank you�察�ma'am�察─�to Miss Prim�察�when she 

has   done   reading   her   sermon。   John�   �when   Goody Twoshoes   comes   next 

Friday�察  �I   desire   she   may   not   be   disturbed   by   theological   controversies。 

You have a fair voice�察�and I heard you and the maids singing a hymn very 

sweetly   the     other   night�察  �and   was   thankful   that   our   humble     household 

should be in such harmony。             Poor old Twoshoes is so old and toothless 

and quaky�察�that she can't sing a bit�察         �but don't be giving yourself airs over 

her�察  �because   she   can't   sing   and   you   can。  Make   her   comfortable   at   our 

kitchen   hearth。     Set   that   old   kettle   to   sing   by   our   hob。 Warm   her   old 

stomach with nut´brown ale and a toast laid in the fire。                   Be kind to the 



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poor old school´girl of ninety�察�who has had leave to come out for a day of 

Christmas      holiday。     Shall    there   be  many     more    Christmases      for  thee�拭�

Think   of   the   ninety   she   has   seen   already�察  �the   fourscore   and   ten   cold�察�

cheerless�察�nipping New Years� �

     If   you   were   in   her   place�察  �would   you   like   to   have   a   remembrance   of 

better early days�察�when you were young and happy�察�and loving�察�perhaps�察�

or   would   you   prefer   to   have   no   past   on   which   your   mind   could   rest�拭�

About the year 1788�察�Goody�察�were your cheeks rosy�察�and your eyes bright�察�

and did some   young fellow in   powder and   a pigtail look   in them�拭                  �We 

may grow old�察�but to   us some stories never   are old。                On a sudden  they 

rise   up�察  �not   dead�察  �but   living      not   forgotten�察  �but   freshly   remembered。 

The eyes gleam on us as they used to do。                 The dear voice thrills in our 

hearts。    The rapture of the meeting�察�the terrible�察�terrible parting�察�again and 

again the tragedy is acted over。            Yesterday�察�in the street�察�I saw a pair of 

eyes so like two which used to brighten at my coming once�察�that the whole 

past   came   back   as   I   walked   lonely�察  �in   the   rush of the   Strand�察�and   I   was 

young again in the midst of joys and sorrows�察�alike sweet and sad�察�alike 

sacred and fondly remembered。 

     If I tell a tale out of school�察�will any harm come to my old school´girl�拭�

Once�察�a lady gave her a half´sovereign�察�which was a source of great pain 

and   anxiety   to   Goody   Twoshoes。         She   sewed   it   away   in   her   old   stays 

somewhere�察�thinking here at least was a safe investment  ��vestis  a vest 

 an investment�察 �pardon me�察�thou poor old thing�察�but I cannot help the 

pleasantry��。      And     what    do   you    think�拭   �Another      pensionnaire      of  the 

establishment cut the coin out of Goody's stays  an old woman who went 

upon two   crutches�        �Faugh�察�the old   witch�        �What�拭      �Violence   amongst 

these toothless�察�tottering�察�trembling�察�feeble ones�拭              �Robbery amongst the 

penniless�拭     �Dogs coming and snatching Lazarus's crumbs out of his lap�拭�

Ah�察  �how   indignant   Goody   was   as   she   told   the   story�     �To   that   pond   at 

Potsdam   where   the   carps   live   for   hundreds   of   hundreds   of   years�察  �with 

hunches      of  blue   mould     on  their   back�察  �I  daresay    the  little  Prince   and 

Princess of Preussen´Britannien come sometimes with crumbs and cakes 

to feed the mouldy ones。 Those eyes may have goggled from beneath the 

weeds at Napoleon's jack´boots�此            �they have seen Frederick's lean shanks 



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reflected in their pool�察       �and perhaps Monsieur de Voltaire has fed them�察�

and now for a crumb of biscuit they will fight�察�push�察�hustle�察�rob�察�squabble�察�

gobble�察�relapsing into their tranquillity when the ignoble struggle is over。 

Sans souci�察�indeed�         �It is mighty well writing ;Sans souci; over the gate�察�

but where is the gate through which Care has not slipped�拭                    �She perches 

on the shoulders of the sentry in the sentry´box�此              �she whispers the porter 

sleeping   in   his   arm´chair�此    �she   glides   up   the   staircase�察  �and   lies   down 

between the king and queen in their bed´royal�此                �this very night I daresay 

she    will   perch   upon    poor    old   Goody     Twoshoes'      meagre    bolster�察  �and 

whisper�察   �Will   the   gentleman   and   those   ladies   ask   me   again�       �No�察  �no�察�

they   will   forget   poor   old   Twoshoes。;   Goody�        �For   shame   of   yourself� �

Do not be cynical。        Do not mistrust your fellow´creatures。              What�拭     �Has 

the Christmas   morning dawned upon thee ninety times�拭                    �For four´score 

and ten years has it been thy lot to totter on this earth�察�hungry and obscure�拭�

Peace   and   goodwill   to   thee�察  �let   us   say   at   this   Christmas   season。   Come�察�

drink�察�eat�察�rest awhile at our hearth�察�thou poor old pilgrim�                   �And of the 

bread   which   God's   bounty   gives   us�察  �I   pray�察  �brother   reader�察  �we   may   not 

forget   to   set   aside   a   part   for   those   noble   and   silent   poor�察  �from   whose 

innocent hands war has torn the means of labour。                   Enough�       �As I hope 

for beef at Christmas�察�I vow a note shall be sent to Saint Lazarus Union 

House�察  �in   which   Mr   Roundabout   requests   the   honour   of   Mrs   Twoshoes' 

company on Friday�察�26th December。 



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                          DE JUVENTUTE 



     We who lived before railways�察�and survive out of the ancient world�察�

are   like   Father   Noah   and   his   family   out   of   the Ark。 The   children   will 

gather round and say to us patriarchs�察 �Tell us�察�grandpapa�察�about the old 

world。;      And   we   shall   mumble   our   old   stories�察  �and   we   shall   drop   off 

one by one�察      �and there will be fewer and fewer of us�察�and these very old 

and   feeble。     There   will   be   but   ten   prae´railroadites   left�此�then   three    

then    two     then   one     then   0�   �If  the   hippopotamus       had   the  least 

sensibility ��of which I cannot trace any signs either in his hide or his face���察�

I think he would go down to the bottom of his tank�察�and never come up 

again。     Does he not see that he belongs to bygone ages�察�and that his great 

hulking barrel of a body is out of place in these times�拭                �What has he in 

common with the brisk young   life surrounding him�拭                  �In the watches of 

the   night�察  �when   the   keepers   are   asleep�察  �when   the   birds   are   on   one   leg�察�

when even the little armadillo is quiet�察�and the monkeys have ceased their 

chatter�察�he  I mean the hippopotamus  and the elephant�察�and the long´ 

necked giraffe�察�perhaps may lay their heads together and have a colloquy 

about   the   great   silent   antediluvian   world   which   they   remember�察  �where 

mighty   monsters   floundered   through   the   ooze�察  �crocodiles   basked   on   the 

banks�察�and dragons darted out of the caves   and waters   before men   were 

made to slay them。        We who lived before railways are antediluvians  we 

must pass away。         We are growing scarcer every day�察             �and old  old   

very old relicts of the times when George was still fighting the Dragon。 

     Not long since�察�a company of horseriders paid a visit to our watering´ 

place。     We   went   to   see   them�察  �and   I   bethought   me   that   young   Walter 

Juvenis�察�who was in the place�察�might like also to witness the performance。 

A   pantomime       is  not  always    amusing     to  persons    who    have   attained   a 

certain age�察     �but   a boy  at   a pantomime   is   always amused   and   amusing�察�

and to see his pleasure is good for most hypochondriacs。 

     

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