lizzie leigh-第4章

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could　na　help　feeling　for　us　in　the　sorrow　God　has　put　upon　us；　so　I

just　put　on　my　bonnet；　and　came　off　unknownst　to　the　lads。　　Every　one

says　you're　very　good；　and　that　the　Lord　has　keeped　you　from　falling

from　His　ways；　but　maybe　you've　never　yet　been　tried　and　tempted　as

some　is。　　I'm　perhaps　speaking　too　plain；　but　my　heart's　welly

broken；　and　I　can't　be　choice　in　my　words　as　them　who　are　happy　can。

Well　now！　　I'll　tell　you　the　truth。　　Will　dreads　you　to　hear　it；　but

I'll　just　tell　it　you。　　You　mun　know〃　but　here　the　poor　woman's

words　failed　her；　and　she　could　do　nothing　but　sit　rocking　herself

backwards　and　forwards；　with　sad　eyes；　straight…gazing　into　Susan's

face；　as　if　they　tried　to　tell　the　tale　of　agony　which　the　quivering

lips　refused　to　utter。　　Those　wretched；　stony　eyes　forced　the　tears

down　Susan's　cheeks；　and；　as　if　this　sympathy　gave　the　mother

strength；　she　went　on　in　a　low　voice〃I　had　a　daughter　once；　my

heart's　darling。　　Her　father　thought　I　made　too　much　on　her；　and　that

she'd　grow　marred　staying　at　home；　so　he　said　she　mun　go　among

strangers　and　learn　to　rough　it。　　She　were　young；　and　liked　the

thought　of　seeing　a　bit　of　the　world；　and　her　father　heard　on　a　place

in　Manchester。　　Well！　　I'll　not　weary　you。　　That　poor　girl　were　led

astray；　and　first　thing　we　heard　on　it；　was　when　a　letter　of　her

father's　was　sent　back　by　her　missus；　saying　she'd　left　her　place；

or；　to　speak　right；　the　master　had　turned　her　into　the　street　soon　as

he　had　heard　of　her　conditionand　she　not　seventeen！〃



She　now　cried　aloud；　and　Susan　wept　too。　　The　little　child　looked　up

into　their　faces；　and；　catching　their　sorrow；　began　to　whimper　and

wail。　　Susan　took　it　softly　up；　and　hiding　her　face　in　its　little

neck；　tried　to　restrain　her　tears；　and　think　of　comfort　for　the

mother。　　At　last　she　said　…



〃Where　is　she　now？〃



〃Lass！　　I　dunnot　know；〃　said　Mrs。　Leigh；　checking　her　sobs　to

communicate　this　addition　to　her　distress。　　〃Mrs。　Lomax　telled　me　she

went〃



〃Mrs。　Lomaxwhat　Mrs。　Lomax？〃



〃Her　as　lives　in　Brabazon　Street。　　She　telled　me　my　poor　wench　went

to　the　workhouse　fra　there。　　I'll　not　speak　again　the　dead；　but　if

her　father　would　but　ha'　letten　mebut　he　were　one　who　had　no

notionno；　I'll　not　say　that；　best　say　nought。　　He　forgave　her　on

his　death…bed。　　I　daresay　I　did　na　go　th'　right　way　to　work。〃



〃Will　you　hold　the　child　for　me　one　instant？〃　said　Susan。



〃Ay；　if　it　will　come　to　me。　　Childer　used　to　be　fond　on　me　till　I　got

the　sad　look　on　my　face　that　scares　them；　I　think。〃



But　the　little　girl　clung　to　Susan；　so　she　carried　it　upstairs　with

her。　　Mrs。　Leigh　sat　by　herselfhow　long　she　did　not　know。



Susan　came　down　with　a　bundle　of　far…worn　baby…clothes。



〃You　must　listen　to　me　a　bit；　and　not　think　too　much　about　what　I'm

going　to　tell　you。　　Nanny　is　not　my　niece；　nor　any　kin　to　me；　that　I

know　of。　　I　used　to　go　out　working　by　the　day。　　One　night；　as　I　came

home；　I　thought　some　woman　was　following　me；　I　turned　to　look。　　The

woman；　before　I　could　see　her　face　（for　she　turned　it　to　one　side）；

offered　me　something。　　I　held　out　my　arms　by　instinct；　she　dropped　a

bundle　into　them；　with　a　bursting　sob　that　went　straight　to　my　heart。

It　was　a　baby。　　I　looked　round　again；　but　the　woman　was　gone。　　She

had　run　away　as　quick　as　lightning。　　There　was　a　little　packet　of

clothesvery　fewand　as　if　they　were　made　out　of　its　mother's

gowns；　for　they　were　large　patterns　to　buy　for　a　baby。　　I　was　always

fond　of　babies；　and　I　had　not　my　wits　about　me；　father　says；　for　it

was　very　cold；　and　when　I'd　seen　as　well　as　I　could　（for　it　was　past

ten）　that　there　was　no　one　in　the　street；　I　brought　it　in　and　warmed

it。　　Father　was　very　angry　when　he　came；　and　said　he'd　take　it　to　the

workhouse　the　next　morning；　and　flyted　me　sadly　about　it。　　But　when

morning　came　I　could　not　bear　to　part　with　it；　it　had　slept　in　my

arms　all　night；　and　I've　heard　what　workhouse　bringing…up　is。　　So　I

told　father　I'd　give　up　going　out　working　and　stay　at　home　and　keep

school；　if　I　might　only　keep　the　baby；　and；　after　a　while；　he　said　if

I　earned　enough　for　him　to　have　his　comforts；　he'd　let　me；　but　he's

never　taken　to　her。　　Now；　don't　tremble　soI've　but　a　little　more　to

telland　maybe　I'm　wrong　in　telling　it；　but　I　used　to　work　next　door

to　Mrs。　Lomax's；　in　Brabazon　Street；　and　the　servants　were　all　thick

together；　and　I　heard　about　Bessy　（they　called　her）　being　sent　away。

I　don't　know　that　ever　I　saw　her；　but　the　time　would　be　about　fitting

to　this　child's　age；　and　I've　sometimes　fancied　it　was　hers。　　And

now；　will　you　look　at　the　little　clothes　that　came　with　herbless

her！〃



But　Mrs。　Leigh　had　fainted。　　The　strange　joy　and　shame；　and　gushing

love　for　the　little　child；　had　overpowered　her；　it　was　some　time

before　Susan　could　bring　her　round。　　There　she　was　all　trembling；

sick　with　impatience　to　look　at　the　little　frocks。　　Among　them　was　a

slip　of　paper　which　Susan　had　forgotten　to　name；　that　had　been　pinned

to　the　bundle。　　On　it　was　scrawled　in　a　round　stiff　hand　…



〃Call　her　Anne。　　She　does　not　cry　much；　and　takes　a　deal　of　notice。

God　bless　you　and　forgive　me。〃



The　writing　was　no　clue　at　all；　the　name　〃Anne；〃　common　though　it

was；　seemed　something　to　build　upon。　　But　Mrs。　Leigh　recognised　one

of　the　frocks　instantly；　as　being　made　out　of　a　part　of　a　gown　that

she　and　her　daughter　had　bought　together　in　Rochdale。



She　stood　up；　and　stretched　out　her　hands　in　the　attitude　of　blessing

over　Susan's　bent　head。



〃God　bless　you；　and　show　you　His　mercy　in　your　need；　as　you　have

shown　it　to　this　little　child。〃



She　took　the　little　creature　in　her　arms；　and　smoothed　away　her　sad

looks　to　a　smile；　and　kissed　it　fondly；　saying　over　and　over　again；

〃Nanny；　Nanny；　my　little　Nanny。〃　　At　last　the　child　was　soothed；　and

looked　in　her　face　and　smiled　back　again。



〃It　has　her　eyes；〃　said　she　to　Susan。



〃I　never　saw　her　to　the　best　of　my　knowledge。　　I　think　it　must　be

hers　by　the　frock。　　But　where　can　she　be？〃



〃God　knows；〃　said　Mrs。　Leigh；　〃I　dare　not　think　she's　dead。　　I'm　sure

she　isn't。〃



〃No；　she's　not　dead。　　Every　now　and　then　a　little　packet　is　thrust　in

under　our　door；　with；　may　be；　two　half…crowns　in　it；　once　it　was

half…a…sovereign。　　Altogether　I've　got　seven…and…thirty　shillings

wrapped　up　for　Nanny。　　I　never　touch　it；　but　I've　often　thought　the

poor　mother　feels　near　to　God　when　she　brings　this　money。　　Father

wanted　to　set　the　policeman　to　watch；　but　I　said　No；　for　I　was　afraid

if　she　was　watched　she　might　not　come；　and　it　seemed　such　a　holy

thing　to　he　checking　her　in；　I　could　not　find　in　my　heart　to　do　it。〃



〃Oh；　if　we　could　but　find　her！　　I'd　take　her　in　my　arms；　and　we'd

just　lie　down　and　die　together。〃



〃Nay；　don't　speak　so！〃　said　Susan；　gently；　〃for　all　that's　come　and

gone；　she　may　turn　right　at　last。　　Mary　Magdalen　did；　you　know。〃



〃Eh！　but　I　were　nearer　right　about　thee　than　Will。　　He　thought　you

would　never　look　on　him　again　if　you　knew　about　Lizzie。　　But　thou'rt

not　a　Pharisee。〃



〃I'm　sorry　he　thought　I　could　be　so　hard；〃　said　Susan　in　a　low　voice；

and　colouring　up。　　Then　Mrs。　Leigh　was　alarmed；　and；　in　her　motherly

anxiety；　she　began　to　fear　lest　she　had　injured　Will　in　Susan's

estimation。



〃You　see　Will　thinks　so　much　of　yougold　would　not　be　good　enough

for　you　to　walk　on；　in　his　eye。　　He　said　you'd　never　look　at　him　as

he　was；　let　alone　his　being　brother　to　my　poor　wench。　　He　loves　you

so；　it　makes　him　think　meanly　on　everything　belonging　to　himself；　as

not　fit　to　come　near　ye；　but　he's　a　good　lad；　and　a　good　son。

Thou'lt　be　a　happy　woman　if　thou'lt　have　him；　so　don't　let　my　words

go　against　himdon't！〃



But　Susan　hung　her　head；　and　made　no　answer。　　She　had　not　known　until

now　that　Will　thought　so　earnestly　and　seriously　about　her；　and　even

now　she　felt　afraid　that　Mrs。　Leigh's　words　promised　her　too　much

happiness；　and　that　they　could　not　be　true。　　At　any　rate；　the

instinct　of　modesty　made　her　shrink　from　saying　anything　which　might

seem　like　a　confession　of　her　own　feelings　to　a　third　person。

Accordingly　she　turned　the　conversation　on　the　child。



〃I　am　sure　he　could　not　help　loving　Nanny；〃　said　she。　　〃There　never

was　such　a　good　little　darling；　don't　you　think　she'd　win　his　heart

if　he　knew　she　was　his　niece；　and　perhaps　bring　him　to　think　kindly

on　his　sister？〃



〃I　dunnot　know；〃　said　Mrs。　Leigh；　shaking　her　head。　　〃He　has　a　turn

in　his　eye　like　his　father；　that　makes　me　He's　right　down　good

though。　　But　you　see；　I've　never　been　a　good　one　at　managing　folk；

one　severe　look　turns　me　sick；　and　then　I　say　just　the　wrong　thing；

I'm　so　fluttered。　　Now　I　should　like　nothing　better　than　to　take

Nancy　home　with　me；　but　Tom　knows　nothing　but　that　his　sister　is

dead；　and　I've　not　the　knack　of　speaking　rightly　to　Will。　　I　dare　not

do　it；　and　that's　the　truth。　　But　you　mun　not　think　badly　of　Will。

He's　so　good　hissel；　that　he　can't　understand　how　any　one　can　do

wrong；　and；　above　all；　I'm　sure　he　loves　you　dearly。〃



〃I　don't　think　I　could　part　with　Nancy；〃　said　Susan；　anxious　to　stop

this　revelation　of　Will's　attachment　to　herself。　　〃He'll　come　round

to　her　soon；　he　can't　fail；　and　I'll　keep　a　sharp　look…out　after　the

poor　mother；　and　try　and　catch　her　the　next　time　she　comes　with　her

little　parcels　of　money。〃



〃Ay；　lass；　we　mun　get　hold　of　her；　my　Lizzie。　　I　love　thee　dearly　for

thy　kindness　to　her　child：　　but；　if　thou　canst　catch　her　for　me；　I'll

pray　for　thee　when　I'm　too　near　my　death　to　speak　words；　and；　while　I

live；　I'll　serve　thee　next　to　hershe　mun　come　first；　thou　know'st。

God　bless　thee；　lass。　　My　heart　is　lighter　by　a　deal　than　it　was　when

I　comed　in。　　Them　lads　will　be　looking　for　me　home；　and　I　mun　go；　and

leave　this　little　sweet　one〃　（kissing　it）。　　〃If　I　can　take　courage；

I'll　tell　Will　all　that　has　come　and　gone　between　us　two。　　He　may

come　and　see　thee；　mayn't　he？〃



〃Father　will　be　very　glad　to　see　him；　I'm　sure；〃　replied　Susan。　　The

way　in　which　this　was　spoken　satisfied　Mrs。　Leigh's　anxious　heart

that　she　had　done　Will　no　harm　by　what　she　had　said；　and；　with　many　a

kiss　to　the　little　one；　and　one　more　fervent　tearful　blessing　on

Susan；　she　went　homewards。







CHAPTER　III。







That　night　Mrs。　Leigh　stopped　at　homethat　only　night　for　many

months。　　Even　Tom；　the　scholar；　looked　up　from　his　books　in

amazement；　but　then　he　remembered　that　Will　had　not　been　well；　and

that　his　mother's　attention　having　been　called　to　the　circumstance；

it　was　only　natural　she　should　stay　to　watch　him。　　And　no　watching

could　be　more　tender；　or　more　complete。　　Her　loving　eyes　seemed　never

averted　from　his　facehis　grave；　sad；　careworn　face。　　When　Tom　went

to　bed　the　mother　left　her　seat；　and　going　up　to　Will；　where　he　sat

looking　at　the　fire；　but　not　seeing　it；　she　kissed　his　forehead；　and