rambling idle excursion-第7章

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where　five　or　six　hundred　people；　half　of　them　white　and　the　other　half
black；　according　to　the　usual　Bermudian　proportions；　and　all　well
dresseda　thing　which　is　also　usual　in　Bermuda　and　to　be　confidently
expected。　　There　was　good　music；　which　we　heard；　and　doubtlessa　good
sermon；　but　there　was　a　wonderful　deal　of　coughing；　and　so　only　the　high
parts　of　the　argument　carried　over　it。　　As　we　came　out；　after　service；
I　overheard　one　young　girl　say　to　another：

〃Why；　you　don't　mean　to　say　you　pay　duty　on　gloves　and　laces！　　I　only　pay
postage；　have　them　done　up　and　sent　in　the　Boston　Advertiser。〃

There　are；　those　that　believe　that　the　most　difficult　thing　to　create　is
a　woman　who　can　comprehend　that　it　is　wrong　to　smuggle；　and　that　an
impossible　thing　to　create　is　a　woman　who　will　not　smuggle；　whether　or
no；　when　she　gets　a　chance。　　But　these　may　be　errors。

We　went　wandering　off　toward　the　country；　and　were　soon　far　down　in　the
lonely　black　depths　of　a　road　that　was　roofed　over　with　the　dense　foliage
of　a　double　rank　of　great　cedars。　　There　was　no　sound　of　any　kind　there；
it　was　perfectly　still。　　And　it　was　so　dark　that　one　could　detect　nothing
but　somber　outlines。　　We　strode　farther　and　farther　down　this　tunnel；
cheering　the　way　with　chat。

Presently　the　chat　took　this　shape：　〃How　insensibly　the　character　of　the
people　and　of　a　government　makes　its　impress　upon　a　stranger；　and　gives
him　a　sense　of　security　or　of　insecurity　without　his　taking　deliberate
thought　upon　the　matter　or　asking　anybody　a　question！　　We　have　been　in
this　land　half　a　day；　we　have　seen　none　but　honest　faces；　we　have　noted
the　British　flag　flying；　which　means　efficient　government　and　good　order；
so　without　inquiry　we　plunge　unarmed　and　with　perfect　confidence　into
this　dismal　place；　which　in　almost　any　other　country　would　swarm　with
thugs　and　garroters〃

'Sh！　　What　was　that？　　Stealthy　footsteps！　　Low　voices！　　We　gasp；　we　close
up　together；　and　wait。　　A　vague　shape　glides　out　of　the　dusk　and
confronts　us。　　A　voice　speaksdemands　money！

〃A　shilling；　gentlemen；　if　you　please；　to　help　build　the　new　Methodist
church。〃

Blessed　sound！　　Holy　sound！　　We　contribute　with　thankful　avidity　to　the
new　Methodist　church；　and　are　happy　to　think　how　lucky　it　was　that　those
little　colored　Sunday…school　scholars　did　not　seize　upon　everything　we
had　with　violence；　before　we　recovered　from　our　momentary　helpless
condition。　　By　the　light　of　cigars　we　write　down　the　names　of　weightier
philanthropists　than　ourselves　on　the　contribution　cards；　and　then　pass
on　into　the　farther　darkness；　saying；　What　sort　of　a　government　do　they
call　this；　where　they　allow　little　black　pious　children；　with
contribution　cards；　to　plunge　out　upon　peaceable　strangers　in　the　dark
and　scare　them　to　death？

We　prowled　on　several　hours；　sometimes　by　the　seaside；　sometimes　inland；
and　finally　managed　to　get　lost；　which　is　a　feat　that　requires　talent　in
Bermuda。　　I　had　on　new　shoes。　　They　were　No。　7's　when　I　started；　but　were
not　more　than　5's　now；　and　still　diminishing。　　I　walked　two　hours　in
those　shoes　after　that；　before　we　reached　home。　　Doubtless　I　could　have
the　reader's　sympathy　for　the　asking。　　Many　people　have　never　had　the
headache　or　the　toothache；　and　I　am　one　of　those　myself；　but　every　body
has　worn　tight　shoes　for　two　or　three　hours；　and　known　the　luxury　of
taking　them　off　in　a　retired　place　and　seeing　his　feet　swell　up　and
obscure　the　firmament。　　Once　when　I　was　a　callow；　bashful　cub；　I　took　a
plain；　unsentimental　country　girl　to　a　comedy　one　night。　　I　had　known　her
a　day；　she　seemed　divine；　I　wore　my　new　boots。　　At　the　end　of　the　first
half…hour　she　said；　〃Why　do　you　fidget　so　with　your　feet？〃　　I　said；　〃Did
I？〃　　Then　I　put　my　attention　there　and　kept　still。　　At　the　end　of　another
half…hour　she　said；　〃Why　do　you　say；　'Yes；　oh　yes！'　and　'Ha；　ha；　oh；
certainly！　　very　true！'　to　everything　I　say；　when　half　the　time　those　are
entirely　irrelevant　answers？〃　　I　blushed；　and　explained　that　I　had　been　a
little　absent…minded。　　At　the　end　of　another　half…hour　she　said；　〃Please；
why　do　you　grin　so　steadfastly　at　vacancy；　and　yet　look　so　sad？〃
I　explained　that　I　always　did　that　when　I　was　reflecting。　　An　hour
passed；　and　then　she　turned　and　contemplated　me　with　her　earnest　eyes　and
said；　〃Why　do　you　cry　all　the　time？〃　　I　explained　that　very　funny
comedies　always　made　me　cry。　　At　last　human　nature　surrendered；　and　I
secretly　slipped　my　boots　off。　　This　was　a　mistake。　　I　was　not　able　to
get　them　on　any　more。　　It　was　a　rainy　night；　there　were　no　omnibuses
going　our　way；　and　as　I　walked　home；　burning　up　with　shame；　with　the　girl
on　one　arm　and　my　boots　under　the　other；　I　was　an　object　worthy　of　some
compassionespecially　in　those　moments　of　martyrdom　when　I　had　to　pass
through　the　glare　that　fell　upon　the　pavement　from　street…lamps。
Finally；　this　child　of　the　forest　said；　〃Where　are　your　boots？〃　and　being
taken　unprepared；　I　put　a　fitting　finish　to　the　follies　of　the　evening
with　the　stupid　remark；　〃The　higher　classes　do　not　wear　them　to　the
theater。〃

The　Reverend　had　been　an　army　chaplain　during　the　war；　and　while　we　were
hunting　for　a　road　that　would　lead　to　Hamilton　he　told　a　story　about　two
dying　soldiers　which　interested　me　in　spite　of　my　feet。　　He　said　that　in
the　Potomac　hospitals　rough　pine　coffins　were　furnished　by　government；
but　that　it　was　not　always　possible　to　keep　up　with　the　demand；　so；　when
a　man　died；　if　there　was　no　coffin　at　hand　he　was　buried　without　one。
One　night；　late；　two　soldiers　lay　dying　in　a　ward。　　A　man　came　in　with　a
coffin　on　his　shoulder；　and　stood　trying　to　make　up　his　mind　which　of
these　two　poor　fellows　would　be　likely　to　need　it　first。　　Both　of　them
begged　for　it　with　their　fading　eyesthey　were　past　talking。　　Then　one
of　them　protruded　a　wasted　hand　from　his　blankets　and　made　a　feeble
beckoning　sign　with　the　fingers；　to　signify；　〃Be　a　good　fellow；　put　it
under　my　bed；　please。〃　　The　man　did　it；　and　left。　　The　lucky　soldier
painfully　turned　himself　in　his　bed　until　he　faced　the　other　warrior；
raised　himself　partly　on　his　elbow；　and　began　to　work　up　a　mysterious
expression　of　some　kind　in　his　face。　　Gradually；　irksomely；　but　surely
and　steadily；　it　developed；　and　at　last　it　took　definite　form　as　a　pretty
successful　wink。　　The　sufferer　fell　back　exhausted　with　his　labor；　but
bathed　in　glory。　　Now　entered　a　personal　friend　of　No。　2；　the　despoiled
soldier。　　No。　2　pleaded　with　him　with　eloquent　eyes；　till　presently　he
understood；　and　removed　the　coffin　from　under　No。　1's　bed　and　put　it
under　No。　2's。　　No。　2　indicated　his　joy；　and　made　some　more　signs；　the
friend　understood　again；　and　put　his　arm　under　No。　2's　shoulders　and
lifted　him　partly　up。　　Then　the　dying　hero　turned　the　dim　exultation　of
his　eye　upon　No。　1；　and　began　a　slow　and　labored　work　with　his　hands；
gradually　he　lifted　one　hand　up　toward　his　face；　it　grew　weak　and　dropped
back　again；　once　more　he　made　the　effort；　but　failed　again。　　He　took　a
rest；　he　gathered　all　the　remnant　of　his　strength；　and　this　time　he
slowly　but　surely　carried　his　thumb　to　the　side　of　his　nose；　spread　the
gaunt　fingers　wide　in　triumph；　and　dropped　back　dead。　　That　picture
sticks　by　me　yet。　　The　〃situation〃　is　unique。

The　next　morning；　at　what　seemed　a　very　early　hour；　the　little　white
table…waiter　appeared　suddenly　in　my　room　and　shot　a　single　word　out　of
himself　〃Breakfast！〃

This　was　a　remarkable　boy　in　many　ways。　　He　was　about　eleven　years　old；
he　had　alert；　intent　black　eyes；　he　was　quick　of　movement；　there　was　no
hesitation；　no　uncertainty　about　him　anywhere；　there　was　a　military
decision　in　his　lip；　his　manner；　his　speech；　that　was　an　astonishing
thing　to　see　in　a　little　chap　like　him；　he　wasted　no　words；　his　answers
always　came　so　quick　and　brief　that　they　seemed　to　be　part　of　the
question　that　had　been　asked　instead　of　a　reply　to　it。　　When　he　stood　at
table　with　his　fly…brush；　rigid；　erect；　his　face　set　in　a　cast…iron
gravity；　he　was　a　statue　till　he　detected　a　dawning　want　in　somebody's
eye；　then　he　pounced　down；　supplied　it；　and　was　instantly　a　statue　again。
When　he　was　sent　to　the　kitchen　for　anything；　he　marched　upright　till　he
got　to　the　door；　he　turned　hand…springs　the　rest　of　the　way。

〃Breakfast！〃

I　thought　I　would　make　one　more　effort　to　get　some　conversation　out　of
this　being。

〃Have　you　called　the　Reverend；　or　are〃

〃Yes　s'r！〃

〃Is　it　early；　or　is〃

〃Eight…five。〃

〃Do　you　have　to　do　all　the　'chores；'　or　is　there　somebody　to　give
you　a〃

〃Colored　girl。〃

〃Is　there　only　one　parish　in　this　island；　or　are　there〃

〃Eight！〃

〃Is　the　big　church　on　the　hill　a　parish　church；　or　is　it〃

〃Chapel…of…ease！〃

〃Is　taxation　here　classified　into　poll；　parish；　town；　and〃

〃Don't　know！〃

Before　I　could　cudgel　another　question　out　of　my　head；　he　was　below；
hand…springing　across　the　back　yard。　　He　had　slid　down　the　balusters；
headfirst。　　I　gave　up　trying　to　provoke　a　discussion　with　him。　　The
essential　element　of　discussion　had　been　left　out　of　him；　his　answers
were　so　final　and　exact　that　they　did　not　leave　a　doubt　to　hang
conversation　on。　　I　suspect　that　there　is　the　making　of　a　mighty　man　or　a
mighty　rascal　in　this　boyaccording　to　circumstancesbut　they　are　going
to　apprentice　him　to　a　carpenter。　　It　is　the　way　the　world　uses　its
opportunities。

During　this　day　and　the　next　we　took　carriage　drives　about　the　island　and
over　to　the　town　of　St。　George's；　fifteen　or　twenty　miles　away。　　Such
hard；　excellent　roads　to　drive　over　are　not　to　be　found　elsewhere　out　of
Europe。　　An　intelligent　young　colored　man　drove　us；　and　acted　as　guide…
book。　　In　the　edge　of　the　town　we　saw　five　or　six　mountain…cabbage　palms
（atrocious　name！）　standing　in　a　straight　row；　and　equidistant　from　each
other。　　These　were　not　the　largest　or　the　tallest　trees　I　have　ever　seen；
but　they　were　the　stateliest；　the　most　majestic。　　That　row　of　them　must
be　the　nearest　that　nature　has　ever　come　to　counterfeiting　a　colonnade。
These　trees　are　all　the　same　height；　say　sixty　feet；　the　trunks　as　gray
as　granite；　with　a　very　gradual　and　perfect　taper；　without　sign　of　branch
or　knot　or　flaw；　the　surface　not　looking　like　bark；　but　like　granite　that
has　been　dressed　and　not　polished。　　Thus　all　the　way　up　the　diminishing
shaft　for　fifty　feet；　then　it　begins　to　take　the　appearance　of　being
closely　wrapped；　spool…fashion；　with　gray　cord；　or　of　having　been　turned
in　a　lathe。　　Above　this　point　there　is　an　outward　swell；　and　thence
upward　for　six　feet　or　more　the　cylinder　is　a　bright；　fresh　green；　and　is
formed　of　wrappings　like　those　of　an　ear　of　green　Indian　corn。　　Then
comes　the　great；　spraying　palm　plume；　also　green。　　Other　palm　trees
always　lean　out　of　the　perpendicular；　or　have　a　curve　in　them。　　But　the
plumb…line　could　not　detect　a　deflection　in　any　individual　of　this
stately　row；　they　stand　as　straight　as　the　colonnade　of　Baalbec；　they
have　its　great　height；　they　have　its　gracefulness；　they　have　its　dignity；
in　moonlight　or　twilight；　and　shorn　of　their　plumes；　they　would　duplicate
it。

The　birds　we　came　across　in　the　country　were　singularly　tame；　even　that
wild　creature；　the　quail；　would　pick　around　in　the　grass　a