hard times(艰难时世)-第14章
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attended； and the experiments you have seen！ After I have heard
you myself； when the whole of my right side has been benumbed；
going on with your master about combustion； and calcination； and
calorification； and I may say every kind of action that could drive a
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poor invalid distracted； to hear you talking in this absurd way
about sparks and ashes！ I wish；” whimpered Mrs Gradgrind；
taking a chair and discharging her strongest point before
succumbing under these mere shadows of facts； “yes； I really do
wish that I had never had a family； and then you would have
known what it was to do without me！”
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Chapter 9
Sissy’s Progress
issy Jupe had not an easy time of it； between Mr
M’Choakumchild and Mrs Gradgrind； and was not without
S
strong impulses； in the first months of her probation； to run
away。 It hailed facts all day long so very hard； and life in general
was opened to her as such a closely ruled ciphering…book； that
surely she would have run away； but for only one restraint。
It is lamentable to think of； but this restraint was the result of
no arithmetical progress； was self…imposed in defiance of all
calculation； and went dead against any table of probabilities that
any Actuary would have drawn up from the premises。 The girl
believed that her father had not deserted her； she lived in the hope
that he would come back； and in the faith that he would be made
the happier by her remaining where she was。
The wretched ignorance with which Jupe clung to this
consolation； rejecting the superior comfort of knowing； on a sound
arithmetical basis； that her father was an unnatural vagabond；
filled Mr Gradgrind with pity。 Yet； what was to be done？
M’Choakumchild reported that she had a very dense head for
figures； that； once possessed with a general idea of the globe； she
took the smallest conceivable interest in its exact measurements；
that she was extremely slow in the acquisition of dates； unless
some pitiful incident happened to be connected therewith； that
she would burst into tears on being required （by the mental
process） immediately to name the cost of two hundred and forty…
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seven muslin caps at fourteenpence halfpenny； that she was as low
down； in the school； as low could be； that after eight weeks of
induction into the elements of Political Economy； she had only
yesterday been set right by a prattler three feet high； for returning
to the question； “What is the first principle of this science？” the
absurd answer； “To do unto others as I would that they should do
unto me。”
Mr Gradgrind observed； shaking his head； that all this was very
bad； that it showed the necessity of infinite grinding at the mill of
knowledge； as per system； schedule； blue book； report； and tabular
statements A to Z； and that Jupe “must be kept to it。” So Jupe was
kept to it； and became low…spirited； but no wiser。
“It would be a fine thing to be you； Miss Louisa！” she said； one
night when Louisa had endeavoured to make her perplexities for
next day something clearer to her。”
“Do you think so？”
“I should know so much； Miss Louisa。 All that is difficult to me
now； would be so easy then。”
“You might not be the better for it； Sissy。”
Sissy submitted； after a little hesitation； “I should not be the
worse； Miss Louisa。” To which Miss Louisa answered； “I don’t
know that。”
There had been so little communication between these two—
both because life at Stone Lodge went monotonously round like a
piece of machinery which discouraged human interference； and
because of the prohibition relative to Sissy’s past career—that
they were still almost strangers。 Sissy； with her dark eyes
wonderingly directed to Louisa’s face； was uncertain whether to
say more or to remain silent。
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“You are more useful to my mother； and more pleasant with
her than I can ever be；” Louisa resumed。 “You are pleasanter to
yourself； than I am to myself。”
“But； if you please Miss Louisa；” Sissy pleaded； “I am—O so
stupid！”
Louisa； with a brighter laugh than usual； told her she would be
wiser by and by。
“You don’t know；” said Sissy； half crying； “what a stupid girl I
am。 All through school hours I make mistakes。 Mr and Mrs
M’Choakumchild call me up； over and over again； regularly to
make mistakes。 I can’t help them。 They seem to come natural to
me。”
“Mr and Mrs M’Choakumchild never make any mistakes
themselves； I suppose； Sissy？”
“O no！” she eagerly returned。 “They know everything。”
“Tell me some of your mistakes。”
“I am almost ashamed；” said Sissy； with reluctance。 “But today；
for instance； Mr M’Choakumchild was explaining to us about
Natural Prosperity。”
“National； I think it must have been；” observed Louisa。
“Yes； it was。—But isn’t it the same？” she timidly asked。
“You had better say； National； as he said so；” returned Louisa；
with her dry reserve。
“National Prosperity。 And he said； Now； this schoolroom is a
Nation。 And in this nation； there are fifty millions of money。 Isn’t
this a prosperous nation？ Girl number twenty； isn’t this a
prosperous nation； and a’n’t you in a thriving state？”
“What did you say？” asked Louisa。
“Miss Louisa； I said I didn’t know。 I thought I couldn’t know
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whether it was a prosperous nation or not； and whether I was in a
thriving state or not； unless I knew who had got the money； and
whether any of it was mine。 But that had nothing to do with it。 It
was not in the figures at all；” said Sissy； wiping her eyes。
“That was a great mistake of yours；” observed Louisa。
“Yes； Miss Louisa； I know it was； now。 Then Mr
M’Choakumchild said he would try me again。 And he said； This
school…room is an immense town； and in it there are a million of
inhabitants； and only five…and…twenty are starved to death in the
streets； in the course of a year。 What is your remark on that
proportion？ And my remark was—for I couldn’t think of a better
one—that I thought it must be just as hard upon those who were
starved； whether the others were a million； or a million million。
And that was wrong too。”
“Of course it was。”
“Then Mr M’Choakumchild said he would try me once more。
And he said； Here are the stutterings—”
“Statistics；” said Louisa。
“Yes； Miss Louisa—they always remind me of stutterings； and
that’s another of my mistakes—of accidents upon the sea。 And I
find （Mr M’Choakumchild said） that in a given time a hundred
thousand persons went to sea on long voyages； and only five
hundred of them were drowned or burnt to death。 What is the
percentage？ And I said； Miss；” here Sissy fairly sobbed as
confessing with extreme contrition to her greatest error； “I said it
was nothing。”
“Nothing； Sissy？”
“Nothing； Miss—to the relations and friends of the people who
were killed。 I shall never learn；” said Sissy。 “And the worst of all is；
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that although my poor father wished me so much to learn； and
although I am so anxious to learn； because he wished me to； I am
afraid I don’t like it。”
Louisa stood looking at the pretty modest head； as it drooped
abashed before her； until it was raised again to glance at her face。
Then she asked：
“Did your father know so much himself； that he wished you to
be well taught too； Sissy？” Sissy hesitated before replying； and so
plainly showed her sense that they were entering on forbidden
ground； that Louisa added； “No one hears us； and if any one did； I
am sure no harm could be found in such an innocent question。”
“No； Miss Louisa；” answered Sissy； upon this encouragement；
shaking her head； “father knows very little indeed。 It’s as much as
he can do to write； and it’s more than people in general can do to
read his writing。 Though it’s plain to me。”
“Your mother？”
“Father said she was quite a scholar。 She died when I was born。
She was；” Sissy made the terrible communication nervously； “she
was a dancer。”
“Did your father love her？” Louisa asked these questions with a
strong； wild； wandering interest peculiar to her； an interest gone
astray like a banished creature； and hiding in solitary places。
“Oh yes！ As dearly as he loves me。 Father loved me； first； for
her sake。 He carried me about with him when I was quite a baby。
We have never been asunder from that time。
