a new england girlhood-第21章

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on　from　the　poets；　that　it　is　love；　service；　the　sacrifice　of　self　for　others'　good。　The　lesson　was　slowly　learned；　but　every　hint　of　it　went　to　my　heart；　and　I　kept　in　silent　upon　my　window　wall　reminders　like　that　of　holy　George　Herbert：〃

〃Be　useful　where　thou　livest；　that　they　may　Both　want　and　wish　thy　pleasing　presence　still。　…Find　out　men'　s　wants　and　will；　And　meet　them　there。　All　worldly　joys　go　less　To　the　one　joy　of　doing　kindnesses；〃

and　that　well…known　passage　from　Talfourd；

〃The　blessings　which　the　weak　and　poor　can　scatter；　Have　their　own　season。　It　is　a　little　thing　to　speak　a　phase　Of　common　comfort；　which；　by　daily　use；　Has　almost　lost　its　sense；　yet　on　the　ear　Of　him　who　thought　to　die　unmourned　't　will　fall　Like　choicest　music。〃

A　very　familiar　extract　from　Carlos　Wilcox；　almost　the　only　quotation　made　nowadays　from　his　poems；　was　often　on　my　sister　Emilie's　lips；　whose　heart　seemed　always　to　be　saying　to　itself：…　…

〃Pour　blessings　round　thee　like　a　shower　of　gold！〃

I　had　that　beside　me；　too；　and　I　copy　part　of　it　here；　for　her　sake；　and　because　it　will　be　good　for　my　girl　readers　to　keep　in　mind　one　of　the　noblest　utterances　of　an　almost　forgotten　American　poet：

〃Rouse　to　some　work　of　high　and　holy　love；　And　thou　an　angel's　happiness　shalt　know；　Shalt　bless　the　earth　while　in　the　world　above。　The　good　begun　by　thee　shall　onward　flow。　The　pure；　sweet　stream　shall　deeper；　wider　grow。　The　seed　that　in　these　few　and　fleeting　hours　Thy　hands；　unsparing　and　unwearied　sow；　Shall　deck　thy　grave　with　amaranthine　flowers；　And　yield　thee　fruits　divine　in　heaven's　immortal　bowers。〃

One　great　advantage　which　came　to　these　many　stranger　girls　through　being　brought　together；　away　from　their　own　homes；　was　that　it　taught　them　to　go　out　of　themselves；　and　enter　into　the　lives　of　others。　Home…life；　when　one　always　stays　at　home；　is　necessarily　narrowing。　　That　is　one　reason　why　so　many　women　are　petty　and　unthoughtful　of　any　except　their　own　family's　interests。　We　have　hardly　begun　to　live　until　we　can　take　in　the　idea　of　the　whole　human　family　as　the　one　to　which　we　truly　belong。　　To　me；　it　was　an　incalculable　help　to　find　myself　among　so　many　working…girls；　all　of　us　thrown　upon　our　own　resources；　but　thrown　much　more　upon　each　others'　sympathies。

And　the　stream　beside　which　we　toiled　added　to　its　own　inspirations　human　suggestions　drawn　from　our　acquaintance　with　each　other。　It　blended　itself　with　the　flow　of　our　lives。　Almost　the　first　of　my　poemlets　in　the　〃Lowell　Offering〃　was　entitled　〃The　River。〃　These　are　some　lines　of　it：

〃Gently　flowed　a　river　bright　On　its　path　of　liquid　light；　Gleaming　now　soft　banks　between；　Winding　now　through　valleys　green；　Cheering　with　its　presence　mild　Cultured　fields　and　woodlands　wild。

〃Is　not　such　a　pure　one's　life？　Ever　shunning　pride　and　strife；　Noiselessly　along　she　goes；　Known　by　gentle　deeds　she　does；　Often　wandering　far；　to　bless；　And　do　others　kindnesses。

〃Thus；　by　her　own　virtues　shaded；　While　pure　thoughts；　like　starbeams；　lie　Mirrored　in　her　heart　and　eye；　She；　content　to　be　unknown；　All　serenely　moveth　on；　Till；　released　from　Time's　commotion；　Self　is　lost　in　Love's　wide　ocean。〃

There　was　many　a　young　girl　near　me　whose　life　was　like　the　beautiful　course　of　the　river　in　my　ideal　of　her。　The　Merrimack　has　blent　its　music　with　the　onward　song　of　many　a　lovely　soul　that；　clad　in　plain　working…clothes；　moved　heavenward　beside　its　waters。

One　of　the　loveliest　persons　I　ever　knew　was　a　young　girl　who　worked　opposite　to　me　in　the　spinning…room。　Our　eyes　made　us　friends　long　before　we　spoke　to　each　other。　She　was　an　orphan；　well…bred　and　well…educated；　about　twenty　years　old；　and　she　had　brought　with　her　to　her　place　of　toil　the　orphan　child　of　her　sister；　left　to　her　as　a　death…bed　legacy。　They　boarded　with　a　relative。　The　factory　boarding…houses　were　often　managed　by　families　of　genuine　refinement；　as　in　this　case；　and　the　one　comfort　of　Caroline's　life　was　her　beautiful　little　niece；　to　whom　she　could　go　home　when　the　day's　work　was　over。

Her　bereavements　had　given　an　appealing　sadness　to　her　whole　expression；　but　she　had　accepted　them　and　her　changed　circumstances　with　the　submission　of　profound　faith　which　everybody　about　her　felt　in　everything　she　said　and　did。　I　think　I　first　knew；　through　her；　how　character　can　teach；　without　words。　To　see　her　and　her　little　niece　together　was　almost　like　looking　at　a　picture　of　the　Madonna。　Caroline　afterwards　became　an　inmate　of　my　mother's　family；　and　we　were　warm　friends　until　her　death　a　few　years　ago。

Some　of　the　girls　could　not　believe　that　the　Bible　was　meant　to　be　counted　among　forbidden　books。　We　all　thought　that　the　Scriptures　had　a　right　to　go　wherever　we　went；　and　that　if　we　needed　them　anywhere；　it　was　at　our　work。　I　evaded　the　law　by　carrying　some　leaves　from　a　torn　Testament　in　my　pocket。

The　overseer；　caring　more　for　law　than　gospel；　confiscated　all　he　found。　He　had　his　desk　full　of　Bibles。　It　sounded　oddly　to　hear　him　say　to　the　most　religious　girl　in　the　room；　when　he　took　hers　away；　〃I　did　think　you　had　more　conscience　than　to　bring　that　book　here。〃　But　we　had　some　close　ethical　questions　to　settle　in　those　days。　It　was　a　rigid　code　of　morality　under　which　we　lived。　Nobody　complained　of　it；　however；　and　we　were　doubtless　better　off　for　its　strictness；　in　the　end。

The　last　window　in　the　row　behind　me　was　filled　with　flourishing　house…plantsfragrant　leaved　geraniums；　the　overseer's　pets。　They　gave　that　corner　a　bowery　look；　the　perfume　and　freshness　tempted　me　there　often。　Standing　before　that　window；　I　could　look　across　the　room　and　see　girls　moving　backwards　and　forwards　among　the　spinning…frames；　sometimes　stooping；　sometimes　reaching　up　their　arms；　as　their　work　required；　with　easy　and　not　ungraceful　movements。　On　the　whole；　it　was　far　from　being　a　disagreeable　place　to　stay　in。　The　girls　were　bright…looking　and　neat；　and　everything　was　kept　clean　and　shining。　The　effect　of　the　whole　was　rather　attractive　to　strangers。

My　grandfather　came　to　see　my　mother　once　at　about　this　time　and　visited　the　mills。　When　he　had　entered　our　room；　and　looked　around　for　a　moment；　he　took　off　his　hat　and　made　a　low　bow　to　the　girls；　first　toward　the　right；　and　then　toward　the　left。　We　were　familiar　with　his　courteous　habits；　partly　due　to　his　French　descent；　but　we　had　never　seen　anybody　bow　to　a　room　full　of　mill　girls　in　that　polite　way；　and　some　one　of　the　family　afterwards　asked　him　why　he　did　so。　He　looked　a　little　surprised　at　the　question；　but　answered　promptly　and　with　dignity；　〃I　always　take　off　my　hat　to　ladies。〃

His　courtesy　was　genuine。　Still；　we　did　not　call　ourselves　ladies。　We　did　not　forget　that　we　were　working…girls；　wearing　coarse　aprons　suitable　to　our　work；　and　that　there　was　some　danger　of　our　becoming　drudges。　I　know　that　sometimes　the　confinement　of　the　mill　became　very　wearisome　to　me。　In　the　sweet　June　weather　I　would　lean　far　out　of　the　window；　and　try　not　to　hear　the　unceasing　clash　of　sound　inside。　Looking　away　to　the　hills；　my　whole　stifled　being　would　cry　out

〃Oh；　that　I　had　wings！〃

Still　I　was　there　from　choice；　and

〃The　prison　unto　which　we　doom　ourselves；　No　prison　is。〃

And　I　was　every　day　making　discoveries　about　life；　and　about　myself。　I　had　naturally　some　elements　of　the　recluse；　and　would　never；　of　my　own　choice；　have　lived　in　a　crowd。　I　loved　quiet…　ness。　The　noise　of　machinery　was　particularly　distasteful　to　me。　But　I　found　that　the　crowd　was　made　up　of　single　human　lives；　not　one　of　them　wholly　uninteresting；　when　separately　known。　I　learned　also　that　there　are　many　things　which　belong　to　the　whole　world　of　us　together；　that　no　one　of　us；　nor　any　few　of　us；　can　claim　or　enjoy　for　ourselves　alone。　I　discovered；　too；　that　I　could　so　accustom　myself　to　the　noise　that　it　became　like　a　silence　to　me。　And　I　defied　the　machinery　to　make　me　its　slave。　Its　incessant　discords　could　not　drown　the　music　of　my　thoughts　if　I　would　let　them　fly　high　enough。　Even　the　long　hours；　the　early　rising　and　the　regularity　enforced　by　the　cladgor　of　the　bell　were　good　discipline　for　one　who　was　naturally　inclined　to　dally　and　to　dream；　and　who　loved　her　own　personal　liberty　with　a　willful　rebellion　against　control。　Perhaps　I　could　have　brought　myself　into　the　limitations　of　order　and　method　in　no　other　way。

Like　a　plant　that　starts　up　in　showers　and　sunshine　and　does　not　know　which　has　best　helped　it　to　grow；　it　is　difficult　to　say　whether　the　hard　things　or　the　pleasant　things　did　me　most　good。　But　when　I　was　sincerest　with　myself；　as　also　when　I　thought　least　about　it；　I　know　that　I　was　glad　to　be　alive；　and　to　be　just　where　I　was。　It　is　a　conquest　when　we　can　lift　ourselves　above　the　annoyances　of　circumstances　over　which　we　have　no　control；　but　it　is　a　greater　victory　when　we　can　make　those　circumstances　our　helpers；　when　we　can　appreciate　the　good　there　is　in　them。　It　has　often　seemed　to　me　as　if　Life　stood　beside　me；　looking　me　in　the　face；　and　saying；　〃Child；　you　must　learn　to　like　me　in　the　form　in　which　you　see　me；　before　I　can　offer　myself　to　you　in　any　other　aspect。〃

It　was　so　with　this　disagreeable　necessity　of　living　among　many　people。　There　is　nothing　more　miserable　than　to　lose　the　feeling　of　our　own　distinctiveness；　since　that　is　our　only　clue　to　the　Purpose　behind　us　and　the　End　before　us。　But　when　we　have　discovered　that　human　beings　are　not　a　mere　〃mass；〃　but　an　orderly　Whole；　of　which　we　are　a　part；　it　is　all　so　different！

This　we　working…girls　might　have　learned　from　the　webs　of　cloth　we　saw　woven　around　us。　Every　little　thread　must　take　its　place　as　warp　or　woof；　and　keep　in　it　steadily。　Left　to　itself；　it　would　be　only　a　loose；　useless　filament。　Trying　to　wander　in　an　independent　or　a　disconnected　way　among　the　other　threads；　it　would　make　of　the　whole　web　an　inextricable　snarl。　Yet　each　little　thread　must　be　as　firmly　spun　as　if　it　were　the　only　one；　or　the　result　would　be　a　worthless　fabric。

That　we　are　entirely　separate；　while　yet　we　entirely　belong　to　the　Whole；　is　a　truth　that　we　learn　to　rejoice　in；　as　we　come　to　understand　more　and　more　of　ourselves；　and　of　this　human　life　of　ours；　which　seems　so　complicated；　and　yet　is　so　simple。　And　when　we　once　get　a　glimpse　of　the　Divine　Plan　in　it　all；　and　know　that　to　be　just　where　we　are；　doing　just　what　we　are　doing　just　at　this　hour　because　it　is　our　appointed　hour；when　we　become　aware　that　this　is　the　very　best　thing　possible　for　us　in　God's　universe；　the　hard　task　grows　easy；　the　tiresome　employment　welcome　and　delightful。　Having　fitted　ourselves　to　our　present　work　in　such　a　way　as　this；　we　are　usually　prepared　for　better　work；　and　are　sent　to　take　a　better　place。

Perhaps　this　is　one　of　the　unfailing　laws　of　progress　in　our　being。　Perhaps　the　Master　of　Life　always　rewards　those　who　do　their　little　faithfully　by　giving　them　some　greater　opportunity　for　faithfulness。　Certainly；　it　is　a　comfort；　wherever　we　are；　to　say　to　ourselves：

〃Thou　camest　not　to　thy　place　by　accident；　It　is　the　very　place　God　meant　for　thee。〃

IX。

MOUNTAIN…FRIENDS。

THE　pleasure　we　found　in　making　new　acquaintances　among　our　workmates　arose　partly　from　their　having　come　from　great　distances；　regions　unkn