the legacy of cain-第12章

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Try　as　I　might；　I　could　get　no　more　than　that　out　of　our　stupid
young　housemaid。

Later　in　the　evening；　the　cook　had　occasion　to　consult　me　about
supper。　This　was　a　person　possessing　the　advantages　of　age　and
experience。　I　asked　if　she　had　seen　the　lady。　The　cook's　reply
promised　something　new：　〃I　can't　say　I　saw　the　lady；　but　I　heard
her。〃

〃Do　you　mean　that　you　heard　her　speaking？〃

〃No；　misscrying。〃

〃Where　was　she　crying？〃

〃In　the　master's　study。〃

〃How　did　you　come　to　hear　her？〃

〃Am　I　to　understand；　miss；　that　you　suspect　me　of　listening？〃

Is　a　lie　told　by　a　look　as　bad　as　a　lie　told　by　words？　I　looked
shocked　at　the　bare　idea　of　suspecting　a　respectable　person　of
listening。　The　cook's　sense　of　honor　was　satisfied；　she　readily
explained　herself：　〃I　was　passing　the　door；　miss；　on　my　way
upstairs。〃

Here　my　discoveries　came　to　an　end。　It　was　certainly　possible
that　an　afflicted　member　of　my　father's　congregation　might　have
called　on　him　to　be　comforted。　But　he　sees　plenty　of　afflicted
ladies；　without　looking　worried　and　anxious　after　they　leave　him。
Still　suspecting　something　out　of　the　ordinary　course　of　events；
I　waited　hopefully　for　our　next　meeting　at　supper…time。　Nothing
came　of　it。　My　father　left　me　by　myself　again；　when　the　meal　was
over。　He　is　always　courteous　to　his　daughters；　and　he　made　an
apology　：　〃Excuse　me；　Helena；　I　want　to　think。〃

。　。　。　。　。　。　。

I　went　to　bed　in　a　vile　humor；　and　slept　badly；　wondering；　in　the
long　wakeful　hours；　what　new　rebuff　I　should　meet　with　on　the
next　day。

At　breakfast　this　morning　I　was　agreeably　surprised。　No　signs　of
anxiety　showed　themselves　in　my　father's　face。　Instead　of
retiring　to　his　study　when　we　rose　from　the　table；　he　proposed
taking　a　turn　in　the　garden：　〃You　are　looking　pale；　Helena；　and
you　will　be　the　better　for　a　little　fresh　air。　Besides；　I　have
something　to　say　to　you。〃

Excitement；　I　am　sure；　is　good　for　young　women。　I　saw　in　his
face；　I　heard　in　his　last　words；　that　the　mystery　of　the　lady　was
at　last　to　be　revealed。　The　sensation　of　languor　and　fatigue
which　follows　a　disturbed　night　left　me　directly。

My　father　gave　me　his　arm；　and　we　walked　slowly　up　and　down　the
lawn。

〃When　that　lady　called　on　me　yesterday；〃　he　began；　〃you　wanted　to
know　who　she　was；　and　you　were　surprised　and　disappointed　when　I
refused　to　gratify　your　curiosity。　My　silence　was　not　a　selfish
silence；　Helena。　I　was　thinking　of　you　and　your　sister；　and　I　was
at　a　loss　how　to　act　for　the　best。　You　shall　hear　why　my　children
were　in　my　mind；　presently。　I　must　tell　you　first　that　I　have
arrived　at　a　decision；　I　hope　and　believe　on　reasonable　grounds。
Ask　me　any　questions　you　please；　my　silence　will　be　no　longer　an
obstacle　in　your　way。〃

This　was　so　very　encouraging　that　I　said　at　once：　〃I　should　like
to　know　who　the　lady　is。〃

〃The　lady　is　related　to　me；〃　he　answered。　〃We　are　cousins。〃

Here　was　a　disclosure　that　I　had　not　anticipated。　In　the　little
that　I　have　seen　of　the　world；　I　have　observed　that　cousinswhen
they　happen　to　be　brought　together　under　interesting
circumstancescan　remember　their　relationship；　and　forget　their
relationship；　just　as　it　suits　them。　〃Is　your　cousin　a　married
lady？〃　I　ventured　to　inquire。

〃No。〃

Short　as　it　was；　that　reply　might　perhaps　mean　more　than　appeared
on　the　surface。　The　cook　had　heard　the　lady　crying。　What　sort　of
tender　agitation　was　answerable　for　those　tears？　Was　it　possible；
barely　possible；　that　Eunice　and　I　might　go　to　bed；　one　night；　a
widower's　daughters；　and　wake　up　the　next　day　to　discover　a
stepmother？

〃Have　I　or　my　sister　ever　seen　the　lady？〃　I　asked。

〃Never。　She　has　been　living　abroad；　and　I　have　not　seen　her
myself　since　we　were　both　young　people。〃

My　excellent　innocent　father！　Not　the　faintest　idea　of　what　I　had
been　thinking　of　was　in　his　mind。　Little　did　he　suspect　how
welcome　was　the　relief　that　he　had　afforded　to　his　daughter's
wicked　doubts　of　him。　But　he　had　not　said　a　word　yet　about　his
cousin's　personal　appearance。　There　might　be　remains　of　good
looks　which　the　housemaid　was　too　stupid　to　discover。

〃After　the　long　interval　that　has　passed　since　you　met；〃　I　said；
〃I　suppose　she　has　become　an　old　woman？〃

〃No；　my　dear。　Let　us　say；　a　middle…aged　woman。〃

〃Perhaps　she　is　still　an　attractive　person？〃

He　smiled。　〃I　am　afraid；　Helena；　that　would　never　have　been　a
very　accurate　description　of　her。〃

I　now　knew　all　that　I　wanted　to　know　about　this　alarming　person；
excepting　one　last　morsel　of　information　which　my　father　had
strangely　forgotten。

〃We　have　been　talking　about　the　lady　for　some　time；〃　I　said；　〃and
you　have　not　yet　told　me　her　name。〃

Father　looked　a　little　embarrassed　〃It's　not　a　very　pretty　name；〃
he　answered。　〃My　cousin；　my　unfortunate　cousin；　isMiss
Jillgall。〃

I　burst　out　with　such　a　loud　〃Oh！〃　that　he　laughed。　I　caught　the
infection；　and　laughed　louder　still。　Bless　Miss　Jillgall！　The
interview　promised　to　become　an　easy　one　for　both　of　us；　thanks
to　her　name。　I　was　in　good　spirits；　and　I　made　no　attempt　to
restrain　them。　〃The　next　time　Miss　Jillgall　honors　you　with　a
visit；〃　I　said；　〃you　must　give　me　an　opportunity　of　being
presented　to　her。〃

He　made　a　strange　reply：　〃You　may　find　your　opportunity；　Helena；
sooner　than　you　anticipate。〃

Did　this　mean　that　she　was　going　to　call　again　in　a　day　or　two？　I
am　afraid　I　spoke　flippantly。　I　said：　〃Oh；　father；　another　lady
fascinated　by　the　popular　preacher？〃

The　garden　chairs　were　near　us。　He　signed　to　me　gravely　to　be
seated　by　his　side；　and　said　to　himself：　〃This　is　my　fault。〃

〃What　is　your　fault？〃　I　asked。

〃I　have　left　you　in　ignorance；　my　dear；　of　my　cousin's　sad　story。
It　is　soon　told；　and；　if　it　checks　your　merriment；　it　will　make
amends　by　deserving　your　sympathy。　I　was　indebted　to　her　father；
when　I　was　a　boy；　for　acts　of　kindness　which　I　can　never　forget。
He　was　twice　married。　The　death　of　his　first　wife　left　him　with
one　childonce　my　playfellow；　now　the　lady　whose　visit　has
excited　your　curiosity。　His　second　wife　was　a　Belgian。　She
persuaded　him　to　sell　his　business　in　London；　and　to　invest　the
money　in　a　partnership　with　a　brother　of　hers；　established　as　a
sugar…refiner　at　Antwerp。　The　little　daughter　accompanied　her
father　to　Belgium。　Are　you　attending　to　me；　Helena？〃

I　was　waiting　for　the　interesting　part　of　the　story；　and　was
wondering　when　he　would　get　to　it。

〃As　time　went　on；〃　he　resumed；　〃the　new　partner　found　that　the
value　of　the　business　at　Antwerp　had　been　greatly　overrated。
After　a　long　struggle　with　adverse　circumstances；　he　decided　on
withdrawing　from　the　partnership　before　the　whole　of　his　capital
was　lost　in　a　failing　commercial　speculation。　The　end　of　it　was
that　he　retired；　with　his　daughter；　to　a　small　town　in　East
Flanders；　the　wreck　of　his　property　having　left　him　with　an
income　of　no　more　than　two　hundred　pounds　a　year。〃

I　showed　my　father　that　I　was　attending　to　him　now；　by　inquiring
what　had　become　of　the　Belgian　wife。　Those　nervous　quiverings；
which　Eunice　has　mentioned　in　her　diary；　began　to　appear　in　his
face。

〃It　is　too　shameful　a　story；〃　he　said；　〃to　be　told　to　a　young
girl。　The　marriage　was　dissolved　by　law；　and　the　wife　was　the
person　to　blame。　I　am　sure；　Helena；　you　don't　wish　to　hear　any
more　of　_this_　part　of　the　story。〃

I　did　wish。　But　I　saw　that　he　expected　me　to　say　Noso　I　said
it。

〃The　father　and　daughter；〃　he　went　on；　〃never　so　much　as　thought
of　returning　to　their　own　country。　They　were　too　poor　to　live
comfortably　in　England。　In　Belgium　their　income　was　sufficient
for　their　wants。　On　the　father's　death；　the　daughter　remained　in
the　town。　She　had　friends　there；　and　friends　nowhere　else；　and
she　might　have　lived　abroad　to　the　end　of　her　days；　but　for　a
calamity　to　which　we　are　all　liable。　A　long　and　serious　illness
completely　prostrated　her。　Skilled　medical　attendance；　costing
large　sums　of　money　for　the　doctors'　traveling　expenses；　was
imperatively　required。　Experienced　nurses；　summoned　from　a
distant　hospital；　were　in　attendance　night　and　day。　Luxuries；　far
beyond　the　reach　of　her　little　income；　were　absolutely　required
to　support　her　wasted　strength　at　the　time　of　her　tedious
recovery。　In　one　word；　her　resources　were　sadly　diminished；　when
the　poor　creature　had　paid　her　debts；　and　had　regained　her　hold
on　life。　At　that　time；　she　unhappily　met　with　the　man　who　has
ruined　her。〃

It　was　getting　interesting　at　last。　〃Ruined　her？〃　I　repeated。　〃Do
you　mean　that　he　robbed　her？〃

〃That；　Helena；　is　exactly　what　I　meanand　many　and　many　a
helpless　woman　has　been　robbed　in　the　same　way。　The　man　of　whom　I
am　now　speaking　was　a　lawyer　in　large　practice。　He　bore　an
excellent　character；　and　was　highly　respected　for　his　exemplary
life。　My　cousin　（not　at　all　a　discreet　person；　I　am　bound　to
admit）　was　induced　to　consult　him　on　her　pecuniary　affairs。　He
expressed　the　most　generous　sympathyoffered　to　employ　her
little　capital　in　his　businessand　pledged　himself　to　pay　her
double　the　interest　for　her　money；　which　she　had　been　in　the
habit　of　receiving　from　the　sound　investment　chosen　by　her
father。〃

〃And　of　course　he　got　the　money；　and　never　paid　the　interest？〃
Eager　to　hear　the　end；　I　interrupted　the　story　in　those
inconsiderate　words。　My　father's　answer　quietly　reproved　me。

〃He　paid　the　interest　regularly　as　long　as　he　lived。〃

〃And　what　happened　when　he　died？〃

〃He　died　a　bankrupt；　the　secret　profligacy　of　his　life　was　at
last　exposed。　Nothing；　actually　nothing；　was　left　for　his
creditors。　The　unfortunate　creature；　whose　ugly　name　has　amused
you；　must　get　help　somewhere；　or　must　go　to　the　workhouse。〃

If　I　had　been　in　a　state　of　mind　to　attend　to　trifles；　this　would
have　explained　the　reason　why　the　cook　had　heard　Miss　Jillgall
crying。　But　the　prospect　before　methe　unendurable　prospect　of
having　a　strange　woman　in　the　househad　showed　itself　too
plainly　to　be　mistaken。　I　could　think　of　nothing　else。　With
infinite　difficulty　I　assumed　a　momentary　appearance　of
composure；　and　suggested　that　Miss　Jillgall's　foreign　friends
might　have　done　something　to　help　her。

My　father　defended　her　foreign　friends。　〃My　dear；　they　were　poor
people；　and　did　all　they　could　afford　to　do。　But　for　their
kindness；　my　cousin　might　not　have　been　able　to　return　to
England。〃

〃And　to　cast　herself　on　your　mercy；〃　I　added；　〃in　the　character
of　a　helpless　woman。〃

〃No；　Helena！　Not　to　cast　herself　on　my　mercybut　to　find　my
house　open　to　her；　as　her　father's　house　was　open　to　me　in　the
bygone　time。　I　am　her　only　surviving　relative；　and；　while　I　live；
she　shall　not　be　a　helpless　woman。〃

I　began　to　wish　that　I　had　not　spoken　out　so　plainly。　My　father's
sweet　temperI　do　so　sincerely　wish　I　had　inherited　it！made
the　kindest　allowances　for　me。

〃I　understand　the　momentary　bitterness　of　feeling　that　has
escaped　you；〃　he　said；　〃I　may　almost　say　that　I　expected　it。　My
only　hesitation　in　this　matter　has　been　caused　by　my　sense　of
what　I　owe　to　my　children。　It　was　putting　your　endurance；　and
your　sister's　endurance；　to　a　trial　to　expect　you　to　receive　a
stranger　（and　that　stranger　not　a　young　girl　like　yourselves）　as
one　of　the　househo