the duchesse de langeais-第26章

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The　Vicomte　bowed；　took　the　letter；　and　went　without　a　word。　　At　five　o'clock　he　returned。　　His　cousin　had　studied　to　please　him；　and　she　looked　lovely　indeed。　　The　room　was　gay　with　flowers　as　if　for　a　festivity；　the　dinner　was　exquisite。　　For　the　grey…headed　Vidame　the　Duchess　displayed　all　the　brilliancy　of　her　wit；　she　was　more　charming　than　she　had　ever　been　before。　　At　first　the　Vidame　tried　to　look　on　all　these　preparations　as　a　young　woman's　jest；　but　now　and　again　the　attempted　illusion　faded；　the　spell　of　his　fair　cousin's　charm　was　broken。　　He　detected　a　shudder　caused　by　some　kind　of　sudden　dread；　and　once　she　seemed　to　listen　during　a　pause。　

〃What　is　the　matter？〃　he　asked。

〃Hush！〃　she　said。

At　seven　o'clock　the　Duchess　left　him　for　a　few　minutes。　　When　she　came　back　again　she　was　dressed　as　her　maid　might　have　dressed　for　a　journey。　　She　asked　her　guest　to　be　her　escort；　took　his　arm；　sprang　into　a　hackney　coach；　and　by　a　quarter　to　eight　they　stood　outside　M。　de　Montriveau's　door。

Armand　meantime　had　been　reading　the　following　letter：


〃MY　FRIEND；I　went　to　your　rooms　for　a　few　minutes　without　your　knowledge；　I　found　my　letters　there；　and　took　them　away。　　This　cannot　be　indifference；　Armand；　between　us；　and　hatred　would　show　itself　quite　differently。　　If　you　love　me；　make　an　end　of　this　cruel　play；　or　you　will　kill　me；　and　afterwards；　learning　how　much　you　were　loved；　you　might　be　in　despair。　　If　I　have　not　rightly　understood　you；　if　you　have　no　feeling　towards　me　but　aversion；　which　implies　both　contempt　and　disgust；　then　I　give　up　all　hope。　　A　man　never　recovers　from　those　feelings。　　You　will　have　no　regrets。　　Dreadful　though　that　thought　may　be；　it　will　comfort　me　in　my　long　sorrow。　　Regrets？　　Oh；　my　Armand；　may　I　never　know　of　them；　if　I　thought　that　I　had　caused　you　a　single　regretBut；　no；　I　will　not　tell　you　what　desolation　I　should　feel。　　I　should　be　living　still；　and　I　could　not　be　your　wife；　it　would　be　too　late！

〃Now　that　I　have　given　myself　wholly　to　you　in　thought；　to　whom　else　should　I　give　myself？to　God。　　The　eyes　that　you　loved　for　a　little　while　shall　never　look　on　another　man's　face；　and　may　the　glory　of　God　blind　them　to　all　besides。　　I　shall　never　hear　human　voices　more　since　I　heard　yoursso　gentle　at　the　first；　so　terrible　yesterday；　for　it　seems　to　me　that　I　am　still　only　on　the　morrow　of　your　vengeance。　　And　now　may　the　will　of　God　consume　me。　　Between　His　wrath　and　yours；　my　friend；　there　will　be　nothing　left　for　me　but　a　little　space　for　tears　and　prayers。

〃Perhaps　you　wonder　why　I　write　to　you？　　Ah！　do　not　think　ill　of　me　if　I　keep　a　gleam　of　hope；　and　give　one　last　sigh　to　happy　life　before　I　take　leave　of　it　forever。　　I　am　in　a　hideous　position。　　I　feel　all　the　inward　serenity　that　comes　when　a　great　resolution　has　been　taken；　even　while　I　hear　the　last　growlings　of　the　storm。　　When　you　went　out　on　that　terrible　adventure　which　so　drew　me　to　you；　Armand；　you　went　from　the　desert　to　the　oasis　with　a　good　guide　to　show　you　the　way。　　Well；　I　am　going　out　of　the　oasis　into　the　desert；　and　you　are　a　pitiless　guide　to　me。　　And　yet　you　only；　my　friend；　can　understand　how　melancholy　it　is　to　look　back　for　the　last　time　on　happinessto　you；　and　you　only；　I　can　make　moan　without　a　blush。　　If　you　grant　my　entreaty；　I　shall　be　happy；　if　you　are　inexorable；　I　shall　expiate　the　wrong　that　I　have　done。　　After　all；　it　is　natural；　is　it　not；　that　a　woman　should　wish　to　live；　invested　with　all　noble　feelings；　in　her　friend's　memory？　　Oh！　my　one　and　only　love；　let　her　to　whom　you　gave　life　go　down　into　the　tomb　in　the　belief　that　she　is　great　in　your　eyes。　　Your　harshness　led　me　to　reflect；　and　now　that　I　love　you　so；　it　seems　to　me　that　I　am　less　guilty　than　you　think。　　Listen　to　my　justification；　I　owe　it　to　you；　and　you　that　are　all　the　world　to　me；　owe　me　at　least　a　moment's　justice。

〃I　have　learned　by　my　own　anguish　all　that　I　made　you　suffer　by　my　coquetry；　but　in　those　days　I　was　utterly　ignorant　of　love。　　YOU　know　what　the　torture　is；　and　you　mete　it　out　to　me！　　During　those　first　eight　months　that　you　gave　me　you　never　roused　any　feeling　of　love　in　me。　　Do　you　ask　why　this　was　so；　my　friend？　　I　can　no　more　explain　it　than　I　can　tell　you　why　I　love　you　now。　　Oh！　certainly　it　flattered　my　vanity　that　I　should　be　the　subject　of　your　passionate　talk；　and　receive　those　burning　glances　of　yours；　but　you　left　me　cold。　　No；　I　was　not　a　woman；　I　had　no　conception　of　womanly　devotion　and　happiness。　　Who　was　to　blame？　　You　would　have　despised　me；　would　you　not；　if　I　had　given　myself　without　the　impulse　of　passion？　　Perhaps　it　is　the　highest　height　to　which　we　can　riseto　give　all　and　receive　no　joy；　perhaps　there　is　no　merit　in　yielding　oneself　to　bliss　that　is　foreseen　and　ardently　desired。　　Alas；　my　friend；　I　can　say　this　now；　these　thoughts　came　to　me　when　I　played　with　you；　and　you　seemed　to　me　so　great　even　then　that　I　would　not　have　you　owe　the　gift　to　pityWhat　is　this　that　I　have　written？

〃I　have　taken　back　all　my　letters；　I　am　flinging　them　one　by　one　on　the　fire；　they　are　burning。　　You　will　never　know　what　they　confessedall　the　love　and　the　passion　and　the　madness

〃I　will　say　no　more；　Armand；　I　will　stop。　　I　will　not　say　another　word　of　my　feelings。　　If　my　prayers　have　not　echoed　from　my　soul　through　yours；　I　also；　woman　that　I　am；　decline　to　owe　your　love　to　your　pity。　　It　is　my　wish　to　be　loved；　because　you　cannot　choose　but　love　me；　or　else　to　be　left　without　mercy。　　If　you　refuse　to　read　this　letter；　it　shall　be　burnt。　　If；　after　you　have　read　it；　you　do　not　come　to　me　within　three　hours；　to　be　henceforth　forever　my　husband；　the　one　man　in　the　world　for　me；　then　I　shall　never　blush　to　know　that　this　letter　is　in　your　hands；　the　pride　of　my　despair　will　protect　my　memory　from　all　insult；　and　my　end　shall　be　worthy　of　my　love。　　When　you　see　me　no　more　on　earth；　albeit　I　shall　still　be　alive；　you　yourself　will　not　think　without　a　shudder　of　the　woman　who；　in　three　hours'　time；　will　live　only　to　overwhelm　you　with　her　tenderness；　a　woman　consumed　by　a　hopeless　love；　and　faithfulnot　to　memories　of　past　joysbut　to　a　love　that　was　slighted。

〃The　Duchesse　de　la　Valliere　wept　for　lost　happiness　and　vanished　power；　but　the　Duchesse　de　Langeais　will　be　happy　that　she　may　weep　and　be　a　power　for　you　still。　　Yes；　you　will　regret　me。　　I　see　clearly　that　I　was　not　of　this　world；　and　I　thank　you　for　making　it　clear　to　me。

〃Farewell；　you　will　never　touch　MY　axe。　　Yours　was　the　executioner's　axe；　mine　is　God's；　yours　kills；　mine　saves。　　Your　love　was　but　mortal；　it　could　not　endure　disdain　or　ridicule；　mine　can　endure　all　things　without　growing　weaker；　it　will　last　eternally。　　Ah！　　I　feel　a　sombre　joy　in　crushing　you　that　believe　yourself　so　great；　in　humbling　you　with　the　calm；　indulgent　smile　of　one　of　the　least　among　the　angels　that　lie　at　the　feet　of　God；　for　to　them　is　given　the　right　and　the　power　to　protect　and　watch　over　men　in　His　name。　　You　have　but　felt　fleeting　desires；　while　the　poor　nun　will　shed　the　light　of　her　ceaseless　and　ardent　prayer　about　you；　she　will　shelter　you　all　your　life　long　beneath　the　wings　of　a　love　that　has　nothing　of　earth　in　it。

〃I　have　a　presentiment　of　your　answer；　our　trysting　place　shall　bein　heaven。　　Strength　and　weakness　can　both　enter　there；　dear　Armand；　the　strong　and　the　weak　are　bound　to　suffer。　　This　thought　soothes　the　anguish　of　my　final　ordeal。　　So　calm　am　I　that　I　should　fear　that　I　had　ceased　to　love　you　if　I　were　not　about　to　leave　the　world　for　your　sake。　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　

〃ANTOINETTE。〃


〃Dear　Vidame；〃　said　the　Duchess　as　they　reached　Montriveau's　house；　〃do　me　the　kindness　to　ask　at　the　door　whether　he　is　at　home。〃　　The　Vidame；　obedient　after　the　manner　of　the　eighteenth　century　to　a　woman's　wish；　got　out；　and　came　back　to　bring　his　cousin　an　affirmative　answer　that　sent　a　shudder　through　her。　　She　grasped　his　hand　tightly　in　hers；　suffered　him　to　kiss　her　on　either　cheek；　and　begged　him　to　go　at　once。　　He　must　not　watch　her　movements　nor　try　to　protect　her。　　〃But　the　people　passing　in　the　street；〃　he　objected。

〃No　one　can　fail　in　respect　to　me；〃　she　said。　　It　was　the　last　word　spoken　by　the　Duchess　and　the　woman　of　fashion。

The　Vidame　went。　　Mme　de　Langeais　wrapped　herself　about　in　her　cloak；　and　stood　on　the　doorstep　until　the　clocks　struck　eight。　　The　last　stroke　died　away。　　The　unhappy　woman　waited　ten；　fifteen　minutes；　to　the　last　she　tried　to　see　a　fresh　humiliation　in　the　delay；　then　her　faith　ebbed。　　She　turned　to　leave　the　fatal　threshold。

〃Oh；　God！〃　the　cry　broke　from　her　in　spite　of　herself；　it　was　the　first　word　spoken　by　the　Carmelite。


Montriveau　and　some　of　his　friends　were　talking　together。　　He　tried　to　hasten　them　to　a　conclusion；　but　his　clock　was　slow；　and　by　the　time　he　started　out　for　the　Hotel　de　Langeais　the　Duchess　was　hurrying　on　foot　through　the　streets　of　Paris；　goaded　by　the　dull　rage　in　her　heart。　　She　reached　the　Boulevard　d'Enfer；　and　looked　out　for　the　last　time　through　falling　tears　on　the　noisy；　smoky　city　that　lay　below　in　a　red　mist；　lighted　up　by　its　own　lamps。　　Then　she　hailed　a　cab；　and　drove　away；　never　to　return。　　When　the　Marquis　de　Montriveau　reached　the　Hotel　de　Langeais；　and　found　no　trace　of　his　mistress；　he　thought　that　he　had　been　duped。　　He　hurried　away　at　once　to　the　Vidame；　and　found　that　worthy　gentleman　in　the　act　of　slipping　on　his　flowered　dressing…gown；　thinking　the　while　of　his　fair　cousin's　happiness。

Montriveau　gave　him　one　of　the　terrific　glances　that　produced　the　effect　of　an　electric　shock　on　men　and　women　alike。

〃Is　it　possible　that　you　have　lent　yourself　to　some　cruel　hoax；　monsieur？〃　Montriveau　exclaimed。　　〃I　have　just　come　from　Mme　de　Langeais's　house；　the　servants　say　that　she　is　out。〃

〃Then　a　great　misfortune　has　happened；　no　doubt；〃　returned　the　Vidame；　〃and　through　your　fault。　　I　left　the　Duchess　at　your　door〃

〃When？〃

〃At　a　quarter　to　eight。〃

〃Good　evening；〃　returned　Montriveau；　and　he　hurried　home　to　ask　the　porter　whether　he　had　seen　a　lady　standing　on　the　doorstep　that　evening。

〃Yes；　my　Lord　Marquis；　a　handsome　woman；　who　seemed　very　much　put　out。　　She　was　crying　like　a　Magdalen；　but　she　never　made　a　sound；　and　stood　as　upright　as　a　post。　　Then　at　last　she　went；　and　my　wife　and　I　that　were　watching　her　while　she　could　not　see　us；　heard　her　say；　‘Oh；　God！'　so　that　it　went　to　our　hearts；　asking　your　pardon；　to　hear　her　say　it。〃

Montriveau；　in　spite　of　all　his　firmness；　turned　pale　at　those　few　words。　　He　wrote　a　few　lines　to　Ronquerolles；　sent　off　the　message　at　once；　and　went　up　to　his　rooms。　　Ronquerolles　came　just　about　midnight。

Armand　gave　him　the　Duchess's　letter　to　read。

〃Well？〃　asked　Ronquerolles。

〃She　was　here　at　my　door　at　eight　o'clock；　at　a　quarter…past　eight　she　had　gone。　　I　have　lost　her；　and　I　love　her。　　Oh！　if　my　life　were　my　own；　I　could　blow　my　brains　out。〃

〃Pooh；　pooh！　　Keep　cool；〃　said　Ronquerolles。　　〃Duchesses　do　not　fly　off　like　wagtails。　　She　cannot　travel　faster　than　three　leagues　an　hour；　and　tomorrow　we　will　ride　six。Confound　it！　　Mme　de　Langeais　is　no　ordinary　woman；〃　he　continued。　　〃Tomorrow　we　will　all　of　us　mount　and　ride。　　The　police　will　put　us　on　her　track　during　the　day。