the dust-第2章
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
ting aforesaid。 Coming down to the specific； he despised men as individuals because he had always found in each and everyone of them a weakness that made it easy for him to use them as he pleased。
Not an altogether pleasant character； this。 But not so unpleasant as it may seem to those unable impartially to analyze human character； even their own especially their own。 And let anyone who is disposed to condemn Norman first look within himselfin some less hypocritical and self…deceiving moment； if he have such momentsand let him note what are the qualities he relies upon and uses in his own struggle to save himself from being submerged and sunk。 Further； there were in Norman many agreeable qualities； important； but less fundamental； therefore less deep… hiddentherefore generally regarded as the real man and as the cause of his success in which they in fact had almost no part。 He was； for example； of striking physical appearance； was attractively dressed and mannered； was prodigally generous。 Neither as lawyer nor as man did he practice justice。 But while as lawyer he practiced injustice； as man he practiced mercy。 Whenever a weakling appealed to him for protection； he gave itat times with splendid recklessness as to the cost to himself in antagonisms and enmities。 Indeed； so great were the generosities of his character that； had he not been arrogant； disdainful； self…confident； reso… lutely and single…heartedly ambitious； he must inevitably have ruined himselfif he had ever been able to rise high enough to be worthy the dignity of catastrophe。
Successful men are usually trying persons to know well。 Lambs； asses； and chickens do not associate happily with lions； wolves； and hawksnor do birds and beasts of prey get on well with one another。 Norman was regarded as 〃difficult〃 by his friendsby those of them who happened to get into the path of his ambition； in front of instead of behind him； and by those who fell into the not unnatural error of misunderstanding his good nature and presuming upon it。 His clients regarded him as insolent。 The big businesses； seeking the rich spoils of commerce； frequent highly perilous waters。 They need skillful pilots。 Usually these lawyer…pilots 〃know their place〃 and put on no airs upon the quarter…deck while they are temporarily in command。 Not so Norman。 He took the full rank； authority and emolumentsof commander。 And as his power； fame； and income were swiftly growing； it is fair to assume that he knew what he was about。
He was admiredextravagantly admiredby young men with not too broad a vein of envy。 He was no woman hateranything but that。 Indeed； those who wished him ill had from time to time hoped to see him tumble down； through miscalculation in some of his audacities with women。 Nohe did not hate women。 But there were several women who hated himor tried to； and if wounded vanity and baffled machination be admitted as just causes for hatred； they had cause。 He likedbut he did not wholly trust。 When he went to sleep； it was not where Delilah could wield the shears。 A most irritating prudenceirritating to friends and intimates of all degrees and kinds； in a race of beings with a mania for being trusted implicitly but with no balancing mania for deserving trust of the implicit variety。
And he ate hugelyand whatever he pleased。 He could drink beyond belief； all sorts of things； with no apparent ill effect upon either body or brain。 He had all the appetites developed abnormally； and abnormal capacity for gratifying them。 Where there was one man who envied him his eminence； there were a dozen who envied him his physical capacities。 We cannot live and act without doing mischief； as well as that which most of us would rather do； provided that in the doing we are not ourselves undone。 Probably in no direction did Norman do so much mischief as in unconsciously leading men of his sets down town and up to imitate his colossal dissipationswhich were not dissipation for him who was abnormal。
Withal； he was a monster for work。 There is not much truth in men's unending talk of how hard they work or are worked。 The ravages from their indulgences in smoking； drinking； gallantry； eating too much and too fast and too often； have to be explained away creditably； to themselves and to othersnotably to the wives or mothers who nurse them and suffer from their diminishing incomes。 Hence the wailing about work。 But once in a while a real worker appearsa man with enormous ingenuity at devising difficult tasks for himself and with enormous persistence in doing them。 Frederick Norman was one of these blue…moon prodigies。
Obviously； such a man could not but be observed and talked about。 Endless stories； some of them more or less true； most of them apocryphal； were told of him stories of his shrewd； unexpected moves in big cases； of his witty retorts； of his generosities； of his peculiarities of dress； of eating and drinking； stories of his adventures with women。 Whatever he did； however trivial； took color and charm from his personality； so easy yet so difficult； so simple yet so complex； so baffling。 Was he wholly selfish？ Was he a friend to almost anybody or to nobody？ Did he ever love？ No one knew； not even himself； for life interested him too intensely and too incessantly to leave him time for self…analysis。 One thing he was certain of； he hated nobody； envied nobody。 He was too successful for that。
He did as he pleased。 And； on the whole； he pleased to do far less inconsiderately than his desires； his abilities； and his opportunities tempted。 Have not men been acclaimed good for less？
In the offices； where he was canvased daily by part… ners； clerks； everyone down to the cleaners whose labors he so often delayed； opinion varied from day to day。 They worshiped him； they hated him。 They loved him； they feared him。 They regarded him as more than human； as less than human； but never as just human though always as endowed with fine human virtues and even finer human weaknesses。 Miss Tillotson； next to the head clerk in rank and payand a pretty and pushing young persondreamed of getting acquainted with himreally well acquainted。 It was a vain dream。 For him； between up town and down town a great gulf… was fixed。 Also； he had no interest in or ammunition for sparrows。
It was in December that Miss HallowellMiss Dorothea Hallowellgot her temporary place at ten dollars a weekthat obscure event； somewhat like a field mouse taking quarters in a horizon…bounded grain field。 It was not until mid…February that she； the palest of personalities； came into direct contact with Norman； about the most refulgent。 This is how it happened。
Late in that February afternoon； an hour or more after the last of the office force should have left； Norman threw open the door of his private office and glanced round at the rows on rows of desks。 The lights in the big room were on； apparently only because he was still within。 With an exclamation of disappointment he turned to re…enter his office。 He heard the click of type… writer keys。 Again he looked round； but could see no one。
〃Isn't there some one here？〃 he cried。 〃Don't I hear a typewriter？〃
The noise stopped。 There was a slight rustling from a far corner； beyond his view； and presently he saw advancing a slim and shrinking slip of a girl with a face that impressed him only as small and insignificant。 In a quiet little voice she said； 〃Yes； sir。 Do you wish anything？〃
〃Why； what are you doing here？〃 he asked。 〃I don't think I've ever seen you before。〃
〃Yes。 I took dictation from you several times；〃 replied she。
He was instantly afraid he might have hurt her feelings； and he； who in the days when he was far； far less than now； had often suffered from that commonplace form of brutality； was most careful not to commit it。 〃I never know what's going on round me when I'm thinking；〃 explained he； though he was saying to himself that the next time he would probably again be unable to remember one with nothing distinctive to fix identity。 〃You areMiss？〃
〃Miss Hallowell。〃
〃How do you happen to be here？ I've given particular instructions that no one is ever to be detained after hours。〃
A little color appeared in the pale； small faceand now he saw that she had a singularly fair and smooth skin； singularly beautifuland he wondered why he had not noticed it before。 Being a close observer； he had long ago noted and learned to appreciate the wonders of that most amazing of tissues； the human skin； and he had come to be a connoisseur。 〃I'm staying of my own accord；〃 said she。
〃They ought not to give you so much work；〃 said he。 〃I'll speak about it。〃
Into the small face came the look of the frightened childa fascinating look。 And suddenly he saw that she had lovely eyes； clear； expressive； innocent。 〃Please don't；〃 she pleaded； in the gentle quiet voice。 〃It isn't overwork。 I did a brief so badly that I was ashamed to hand it in。 I'm doing it again。〃
He laughed； and a fine frank laugh he had when he was in the mood。 At once a smile lighted up her face； danced in her eyes； hovered bewitchingly about her lipsand he wondered why he had not at first glance noted how sweet and charmingly fresh her mouth was。 〃Why； she's beautiful；〃 he said to himself； the manly man's inevitable interest in feminine charm wide awake。 〃Really beautiful。 If she had a figureand were tall〃 As he thought thus； he glanced at her figure。 A figure？ Tall？ She certainly was tallno； she wasn'tyes； she was。 No； not tall from head to foot； but with the most captivating long lineslong throat； long bust； long arms； long in body and in legs long and slenderyet somehow not tall。 Heall this took but an instantreturned his glance to her face。 He was startled。 The beauty had fled； leaving not a trace behind。 Before him wavered once more a small insignificance。 Even her skin now seemed commonplace。
She was saying； 〃Did you wish me to do something？〃
〃Yesa letter。 Come in；〃 he said abruptly。
Once more the business in hand took possession of his mind。 He became unconscious of her presence。 He dictated slowly； carefully choosing his words； for perhaps a quarter of an hour。 Then he stopped and paced up and down； revolving a new idea； a new phase of the business； that had flashed upon him。 When he had his thoughts once more in form he turned toward the girl； the mere machine。 He gazed at her in amazement。 When he had last looked； he had seen an uninteresting nonentity。 But that was not this person； seated before him in the same garments and with the same general blondness。 That person had been a girl。 This time the transformation was not into the sweet innocence of lovely childhood； but into something incredibly different。 He was gazing now at a woman； a beautiful world… weary woman； one who had known the joys and then the sorrows of life and love。 Heavy were the lids of the large eyes gazing mournfully into infinitygazing upon the graves of a life； the long； long vista of buried joys。 Never had he seen anything so sad or so lovely as her mouth。 The soft； smooth skin was not merely pale； its pallor was that of wakeful nights； of weeping until there were no more tears to drain away。
〃Miss Hallowell〃 he began。
She star
