hemingway, ernest - islands in the stream-第53章
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ches and we will take only enough water to the next key。〃
He stopped and reconsidered； ¨No； Iˇm sorry。 I was wrong。 Fill water until sundown and I will take her out at moonrise。 We lose three hours but we save six later on。〃
¨Did you taste the water？〃 Ara asked。
¨Yes；〃 he said。 ¨It was clean and good。 You were quite right。〃
¨Thank you；〃 Ara said。 ¨I will go now to call in Willie。 He has been diving many。〃
¨Tom；〃 Henry asked。 ¨Do you want me to stay with you or to carry water or what？〃
¨Carry water until you are too tired and then get some sleep。 I want you on the bridge with me tonight。〃
¨Can I bring you a shirt or a sweater？〃 Henry asked。
¨Bring me a shirt and one of the very light blankets；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨I can sleep now in the sun and the sand is dry。 But later on it will be cool with the wind。〃
¨Isnˇt the sand wonderful？ Iˇve never known such dry or powdery sand。〃
¨The wind has beaten it for many years。〃
¨Will we get them； Tommy？〃
¨Of course；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨There is no doubt of it at all。〃
¨Please forgive me if I am ever stupid；〃 Henry said。
¨You were forgiven when you were born；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨You are a very brave boy； Henry； and I am fond of you and trust you。 Youˇre not stupid either。〃
¨You truly think we will have a fight？〃
¨I know it。 Do not think about that。 Think about details。 Think about all the things you should do and how we should be a happy ship until we fight。 Iˇll think about the fight。〃
¨I will go and do my duty as well as I can；〃 Henry said。 ¨I wish we could practice the fight so I could do my part better。〃
Thomas Hudson said； ¨Youˇll do it all right。 I do not see any way that we can miss it。〃
¨Itˇs been so very long；〃 Henry said。
¨But everything is long；〃 Thomas Hudson told him。 ¨And pursuit is the longest。〃
¨Get some sleep；〃 Henry said。 ¨You never sleep any more。〃
¨Iˇll sleep；〃 Thomas Hudson said。
¨Where do you suppose they lost their own boat； Tom？〃 Ara asked。
¨They got these boats here and they did away with these people a week ago； say。 So they must be the one that Camag？ey claimed。 But they got somewhere close to here before they lost her。 They didnˇt sail any rubber boats into that wind。〃
¨Then they must have lost her east of here。〃
¨Naturally。 And they were damned well in the clear when they lost her；〃 Thomas Hudson said。
¨It was still a long way home；〃 Henry said。
¨It is going to be a longer way home now；〃 Ara said。
¨Theyˇre funny people；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨Theyˇre all brave and some of them are so damned admirable。 Then they have mean ones like this。〃
¨We better go and do our work；〃 Ara said。 ¨We can talk tonight on watch to keep awake。 You get some rest； Tom。〃
¨Get some sleep；〃 Henry said。
¨Rest is as good as sleep。〃
¨No it isnˇt；〃 Ara said。 ¨You need sleep； Tom。〃
¨Iˇll try to get some；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 But when they were gone he could not sleep。
What did they have to do this rotten thing here for？ he thought。 We will get them anyway。 All these people would have done was tell us how many they were and how they were armed。 I suppose that was worth killing for； from their standpoint。 Especially if they thought of these people as Negroes。 But all that shows something about them。 To have killed like that they must have some plan and they must have some hope of being picked up。 Also there must have been dissension about the plan or they would not have done this murdering here of the sailor。 That could be an execution for anything； though。 He might have let her go down when she could have been kept up to make the try to get home。
Where does that bring us？ he thought。 You canˇt bank on that。 It is only a possibility。 But if it was true it would mean she went down in sight of land and fast。 That would mean they would not have much stuff。 Maybe the boy did not do it and was falsely accused。
You donˇt know how many boats they have because there could be a boat or two boats from here out turtling。 There is nothing to do but think around it and check your keys。
But suppose they have crossed the Old Bahama channel and hit the Cuban coast？ Sure； he thought。 Why didnˇt you think of that before？ Thatˇs the best thing for them to do。
If they do that they can make for home on a Spanish boat out of Havana。 There is a screening at Kingston。 But that is an easier chance to take and you know plenty of people have beaten it。 That damned Peters with his radio out。 FCC； he thought。 Frankly Canˇt Communicate。 Then we got the beauty big one and it was too much radio for him。 I donˇt know how he has fucked it。 But he couldnˇt get Guant？namo last night on our call hour and if he doesnˇt get her tonight we are on our own。 The hell with it； he thought。 There are worse places to be than on your own。 Get some sleep now； he said to himself。 There is nothing you can do now that is sounder than that。
He moved his shoulders against the sand and went to sleep with the roaring of the surf on the reef。
III
WHILE THOMAS HUDSON WAS ASLEEP he dreamed that his son Tom was not dead and that the other boys were all right and that the war was over。 He dreamed that Tomˇs mother was sleeping with him and she was sleeping on top of him as she liked to do sometimes。 He felt all of this and the tangibility of her legs against his legs and her body against his and her breasts against his chest and her mouth was playing against his mouth。 Her hair hung down and lay heavy and silky on his eyes and on his cheeks and he turned his lips away from her searching ones and took the hair in his mouth and held it。 Then with one hand he moistened the 。357 Magnum and slipped it easily and sound asleep where it should be。 Then he lay under her weight with her silken hair over his face like a curtain and moved slowly and rhythmically。
That was when Henry put the light blanket over him and Thomas Hudson said； asleep； ¨Thank you for being so moist and lovely and for pressing on me so hard。 Thank you for coming back so quickly and for not being too thin。〃
¨The poor son of a bitch；〃 Henry said and covered him carefully。 He went away carrying two wicker five…gallon demijohns on his shoulders。
¨I thought you wanted me thin； Tom；〃 the woman said in the dream。 ¨You said I felt like a young goat when I was thin and that nothing felt better than a young goat。〃
¨You；〃 he said。 ¨Whoˇs going to make love to who？〃
¨Both of us；〃 she said。 ¨Unless you want it differently。〃
¨You make love to me。 Iˇm tired。〃
¨Youˇre just lazy。 Let me take the pistol off and put it by your leg。 The pistolˇs in the way of everything。〃
¨Lay it by the bed；〃 he said。 ¨And make everything the way it should be。〃
Then it was all the way it should be and she said； ¨Should I be you or you be me？〃
¨You have first choice。〃
¨Iˇll be you。〃
¨I canˇt be you。 But I can try。〃
¨Itˇs fun。 You try it。 Donˇt try to save yourself at all。 Try to lose everything and take everything too。〃
¨All right。〃
¨Are you doing it？〃
¨Yes；〃 he said。 ¨Itˇs wonderful。〃
¨Do you know now what we have？〃
¨Yes；〃 he said。 ¨Yes I know。 Itˇs easy to give up。〃
¨Will you give up everything？ Are you glad I brought back the boys and that I come and be a devil in the night？〃
¨Yes。 Iˇm glad of everything and will you swing your hair across my face and give me your mouth please and hold me so tight it kills me？〃
¨Of course。 And youˇll do it for me？〃
When he woke he touched the blanket and he did not know； for an instant； that it was a dream。 Then he lay on his side and felt the pistol holster between his legs and how it was really and all the hollownesses in him were twice as hollow and there was a new one from the dream。 He saw it was still light and he saw the dinghy carrying water to his ship and he saw the white pounding of the surf on the reef。 He turned on his side and tucked the blanket around himself and slept on his arms。 He was asleep when they came to wake him and he had not dreamed at all this time。
IV
HE STEERED ALL THAT NIGHT and he had Ara on the flying bridge with him until midnight and then Henry。 They were running with a heavy beam sea and steering was like riding a horse downhill； he thought。 It is all downhill and sometimes it is across the side of a hill。 The sea is many hills and in here it is a broken country like the badlands。
¨Talk to me；〃 he said to Ara。
¨What about； Tom？〃
¨Anything。〃
¨Peters couldnˇt raise Guant？namo again。 He has ruined it。 The new big one。〃
¨I know；〃 Thomas Hudson said and tried to roll her as little as he could； riding the side of the hill。 ¨Heˇs burnt out something that he canˇt repair。〃
¨Heˇs listening；〃 Ara said。 ¨Willie is keeping him awake。〃
¨Whoˇs keeping Willie awake？〃
¨Heˇs awake good；〃 Ara said。 ¨He doesnˇt sleep any better than you。〃
¨How about you？〃
¨Iˇm good for all night if you want。 Donˇt you want me to steer？〃
¨No。 I havenˇt anything else to do。〃
¨Tom； how badly do you feel？〃
¨I donˇt know。 How badly can you feel？〃
¨Itˇs useless；〃 Ara said。 ¨Would you like the wineskin？〃
¨No。 Bring me up a bottle of cold tea and check on Peters and Willie。 Check on everything。〃
Ara went down and Thomas Hudson was alone with the night and the sea and he still rode it like a horse going downhill too fast across broken country。
Henry came up with the bottle of cold tea。
¨How are we； Tom？〃 he asked。
¨Weˇre perfect。〃
¨Peters has the Miami police department on the old radio。 All the prowl cars。 Willie wants to talk to them。 But I told him he couldnˇt。〃
¨Correct。〃
¨On the UHF； Peters has something squirting in German but he says it is way up with the wolf packs。〃
¨He couldnˇt hear it then。〃
¨Itˇs a very funny night； Tom。〃
¨Itˇs not that funny。〃
¨I donˇt know。 Iˇm just telling you。 Give me the course and let me take her and you go down。〃
¨Has Peters logged it？〃
¨Of course。〃
¨Tell Juan to give me a fix and have Peters log it。 When was the son of a bitch squirting？〃
¨When I came up。〃
¨Tell Juan to get the fix and log it right away。〃
¨Yes； Tom。〃
¨How are all the comic characters？〃
¨Sleeping。 Gil； too。〃
¨Get the rag out and have Peters log the fix。〃
¨Do you want it？〃
¨I know too damn well where we are。〃
¨Yes； Tom；〃 Henry said。 ¨Take it easy if you can。〃
Henry came up but Thomas Hudson did not feel like talking and Henry stood by him on the flying bridge and braced himself against the roll。 After an hour he said； ¨Thereˇs a light； Tom。 Off our starboard bow about twenty degrees。〃
¨Thatˇs right。〃
When he was abeam of it he changed the course and the sea was astern。
¨Now she is headed home to pasture；〃 he said to Henry。 ¨Weˇre in the channel now。 Wake Juan and get him up here and really keep your eyes open。 You were late on the light。〃
¨Iˇm sorry； Tom。 Iˇll get Juan。 Wouldnˇt you like a four…man watch？〃
¨Not until just before daylight；〃 Thomas Hudson said。 ¨Iˇll give you the word。〃
They might have
