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three men in a boat-及34嫗

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The river ´ with the sunlight flashing from its dancing wavelets�察�gilding 

gold the grey´green beech´ trunks�察�glinting through the dark�察�cool wood 

paths�察�chasing shadows o'er the shallows�察�flinging diamonds from the 

mill´wheels�察�throwing kisses to the lilies�察�wantoning with the weirs' 

white waters�察�silvering moss´grown walls and bridges�察�brightening every 

tiny townlet�察�making sweet each lane and meadow�察�lying tangled in the 

rushes�察�peeping�察�laughing�察�from each inlet�察�gleaming gay on many a far 

sail�察�making soft the air with glory ´ is a golden fairy stream。



But the river ´ chill and weary�察�with the ceaseless rain´drops falling on 

its brown and sluggish waters�察�with a sound as of a woman�察�weeping low in 

some dark chamber�察�while the woods�察�all dark and silent�察�shrouded in 

their mists of vapour�察�stand like ghosts upon the margin�察�silent ghosts 

with eyes reproachful�察�like the ghosts of evil actions�察�like the ghosts 

of friends neglected ´ is a spirit´haunted water through the land of vain 


regrets。



Sunlight is the life´blood of Nature。  Mother Earth looks at us with such 

dull�察�soulless eyes�察�when the sunlight has died away from out of her。  It 

makes us sad to be with her then�察�she does not seem to know us or to care 

for us。  She is as a widow who has lost the husband she loved�察�and her 

children touch her hand�察�and look up into her eyes�察�but gain no smile 

from her。



We rowed on all that day through the rain�察�and very melancholy work it 

was。  We pretended�察�at first�察�that we enjoyed it。  We said it was a 

change�察�and that we liked to see the river under all its different 

aspects。  We said we could not expect to have it all sunshine�察�nor should 

we wish it。  We told each other that Nature was beautiful�察�even in her 

tears。



Indeed�察�Harris and I were quite enthusiastic about the business�察�for the 

first few hours。  And we sang a song about a gipsy's life�察�and how 

delightful a gipsy's existence was�  � free to storm and sunshine�察�and to 

every wind that blew�  � and how he enjoyed the rain�察�and what a lot of 

good it did him�察�and how he laughed at people who didn't like it。



George took the fun more soberly�察�and stuck to the umbrella。



We hoisted the cover before we had lunch�察�and kept it up all the 

afternoon�察�just leaving a little space in the bow�察�from which one of us 

could paddle and keep a look´out。  In this way we made nine miles�察�and 

pulled up for the night a little below Day's Lock。



I cannot honestly say that we had a merry evening。  The rain poured down 

with quiet persistency。  Everything in the boat was damp and clammy。  

Supper was not a success。  Cold veal pie�察�when you don't feel hungry�察�is 

apt to cloy。  I felt I wanted whitebait and a cutlet�察�Harris babbled of 

soles and white´sauce�察�and passed the remains of his pie to Montmorency�察�

who declined it�察�and�察�apparently insulted by the offer�察�went and sat over 

at the other end of the boat by himself。



George requested that we would not talk about these things�察�at all events 

until he had finished his cold boiled beef without mustard。



We played penny nap after supper。  We played for about an hour and a 

half�察�by the end of which time George had won fourpence ´ George always 

is lucky at cards ´ and Harris and I had lost exactly twopence each。



We thought we would give up gambling then。  As Harris said�察�it breeds an 

unhealthy excitement when carried too far。  George offered to go on and 

give us our revenge�察�but Harris and I decided not to battle any further 

against Fate。



After that�察�we mixed ourselves some toddy�察�and sat round and talked。  

George told us about a man he had known�察�who had come up the river two 

years ago and who had slept out in a damp boat on just such another night 

as that was�察�and it had given him rheumatic fever�察�and nothing was able 

to save him�察�and he had died in great agony ten days afterwards。  George 

said he was quite a young man�察�and was engaged to be married。  He said it 

was one of the saddest things he had ever known。



And that put Harris in mind of a friend of his�察�who had been in the 

Volunteers�察�and who had slept out under canvas one wet night down at 

Aldershot�察 �on just such another night as this�察─�said Harris�察�and he had 

woke up in the morning a cripple for life。  Harris said he would 

introduce us both to the man when we got back to town�察�it would make our 

hearts bleed to see him。



This naturally led to some pleasant chat about sciatica�察�fevers�察�chills�察�

lung diseases�察�and bronchitis�察�and Harris said how very awkward it would 

be if one of us were taken seriously ill in the night�察�seeing how far 

away we were from a doctor。



There seemed to be a desire for something frolicksome to follow upon this 

conversation�察�and in a weak moment I suggested that George should get out 

his banjo�察�and see if he could not give us a comic song。



I will say for George that he did not want any pressing。  There was no 

nonsense about having left his music at home�察�or anything of that sort。  

He at once fished out his instrument�察�and commenced to play ;Two Lovely 

Black Eyes。;



I had always regarded ;Two Lovely Black Eyes; as rather a commonplace 

tune until that evening。  The rich vein of sadness that George extracted 

from it quite surprised me。



The desire that grew upon Harris and myself�察�as the mournful strains 

progressed�察�was to fall upon each other's necks and weep�察�but by great 

effort we kept back the rising tears�察�and listened to the wild yearnful 

melody in silence。



When the chorus came we even made a desperate effort to be merry。  We re´

filled our glasses and joined in�察�Harris�察�in a voice trembling with 

emotion�察�leading�察�and George and I following a few words behind��





;Two lovely black eyes��

Oh� �what a surprise��

Only for telling a man he was wrong��

Two ´ ;





There we broke down。  The unutterable pathos of George's accompaniment to 

that ;two; we were�察�in our then state of depression�察�unable to bear。  

Harris sobbed like a little child�察�and the dog howled till I thought his 

heart or his jaw must surely break。



George wanted to go on with another verse。  He thought that when he had 

got a little more into the tune�察�and could throw more ;abandon�察─�as it 

were�察�into the rendering�察�it might not seem so sad。  The feeling of the 

majority�察�however�察�was opposed to the experiment。



There being nothing else to do�察�we went to bed ´ that is�察�we undressed 

ourselves�察�and tossed about at the bottom of the boat for some three or 

four hours。  After which�察�we managed to get some fitful slumber until 

five a。m。�察�when we all got up and had breakfast。



The second day was exactly like the first。  The rain continued to pour 

down�察�and we sat�察�wrapped up in our mackintoshes�察�underneath the canvas�察�

and drifted slowly down。



One of us ´ I forget which one now�察�but I rather think it was myself ´ 

made a few feeble attempts during the course of the morning to work up 

the old gipsy foolishness about being children of Nature and enjoying the 

wet�察�but it did not go down well at all。  That ´





;I care not for the rain�察�not I� �





was so painfully evident�察�as expressing the sentiments of each of us�察�

that to sing it seemed unnecessary。



On one point we were all agreed�察�and that was that�察�come what might�察�we 

would go through with this job to the bitter end。  We had come out for a 

fortnight's enjoyment on the river�察�and a fortnight's enjoyment on the 

river we meant to have。  If it killed us� �well�察�that would be a sad thing 

for our friends and relations�察�but it could not be helped。  We felt that 

to give in to the weather in a climate such as ours would be a most 

disastrous precedent。



;It's only two days more�察─�said Harris�察 �and we are young and strong。  We 

may get over it all right�察�after all。;



At about four o'clock we began to discuss our arrangements for the 

evening。  We were a little past Goring then�察�and we decided to paddle on 

to Pangbourne�察�and put up there for the night。



;Another jolly evening� ─�murmured George。



We sat and mused on the prospect。  We should be in at Pangbourne by five。  

We should finish dinner at�察�say�察�half´past six。  After that we could walk 

about the village in the pouring rain until bed´time�察�or we could sit in 

a dimly´lit bar´parlour and read the almanac。



;Why�察�the Alhambra would be almost more lively�察─�said Harris�察�venturing 

his head outside the cover for a moment and taking a survey of the sky。



;With a little supper at the ´ * to follow�察─�I added�察�half unconsciously。



* A capital little out´of´the´way restaurant�察�in the neighbourhood of ´ �察�

where you can get one of the best´cooked and cheapest little French 

dinners or suppers that I know of�察�with an excellent bottle of Beaune�察�

for three´and´six�察�and which I am not going to be idiot enough to 

advertise。



;Yes it's almost a pity we've made up our minds to stick to this boat�察─�

answered Harris�察�and then there was silence for a while。



;If we HADN'T made up our minds to contract our certain deaths in this 

bally old coffin�察─�observed George�察�casting a glance of intense 

malevolence over the boat�察 �it might be worth while to mention that 

there's a train leaves Pangbourne�察�I know�察�soon after five�察�which would 

just land us in town in comfortable time to get a chop�察�and then go on to 

the place you mentioned afterwards。;



Nobody spoke。  We looked at one another�察�and each one seemed to see his 

own mean and guilty thoughts reflected in the faces of the others。  In 

silence�察�we dragged out and overhauled the Gladstone。  We looked up the 

river and down the river�察�not a soul was in sight��



Twenty minutes later�察�three figures�察�followed by a shamed´looking dog�察�

might have been seen creeping stealthily from the boat´house at the 

;Swan; towards the railway station�察�dressed in the following neither neat 

nor gaudy costume��



Black leather shoes�察�dirty�察�suit of boating flannels�察�very dirty�察�brown 

felt hat�察�much battered�察�mackintosh�察�very wet�察�umbrella。



We had deceived the boatman at Pangbourne。  We had not had the face to 

tell him that we were running away from the rain。  We had left the boat�察�

and all it contained�察�in his charge�察�with instructions that it was to be 

ready for us at nine the next morning。  If�察�we said ´ IF anything 

unforeseen should happen�察�preventing our return�察�we would write to him。



We reached Paddington at seven�察�and drove direct to the restaurant I have 

before described�察�where we partook of a light meal�察�left Montmorency�察�

together with suggestions for a supper to be ready at half´past ten�察�and 

then continued our way to Leicester Square。



We attracted a good deal of attention at the Alhambra。  On our presenting 

ourselves at the paybox we were gruffly directed to go round to Castle 

Street�察�and were informed that

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