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及12嫗

stories by english authors in london(哂忽恬社壓戴禁議絞並)-及12嫗


梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈��梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈��梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何��
!!!!隆堋響頼��紗秘慕禰厮宴和肝写偬堋響��




reason that   men   are   such   perfect   fools�察  �and   shopkeepers   do   as   they  like 

with them。 But she presently improved on that。 She found a man selling 

cheap remnants at a street´corner�察�and straightway she conceived the idea 

of making Simmons's clothes herself。 Decision was one of her virtues�察�and 

a   suit   of   uproarious   check   tweeds   was   begun   that   afternoon   from   the 

pattern furnished by an old one。 More�此�it was finished by Sunday�察�when 

Simmons�察  �overcome   by   astonishment   at   the   feat�察  �was   endued   in   it�察  �and 

pushed off to chapel ere he could recover his senses。 The things were not 

altogether comfortable�察�he found�此�the trousers hung tight against his shins�察�

but hung loose behind his heels�察�and when he sat�察�it was on a wilderness of 

hard folds and seams。 Also�察�his waistcoat collar tickled his nape�察�but his 

coat collar went straining across from shoulder to shoulder�察�while the main 

garment   bagged   generously   below   his   waist。   Use   made   a   habit   of   his 

discomfort�察�but it never reconciled him to the chaff of his shopmates�察�for�察�

as   Mrs。   Simmons   elaborated   successive  suits�察  �each   one   modelled   on   the 

last�察�the primal accidents of her design developed into principles�察�and grew 

even bolder and more hideously pronounced。 It was vain for Simmons to 

hintas     hint   he  did   that   he   shouldn't     like   her  to   overwork      herself�察�

tailoring being bad for the eyes�察�and there was a new tailor's in the Mile 

End   Road�察  �very   cheap�察  �where   。   。   。   ;Ho   yus�察─  �she   retorted�察   �you're   very 



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consid'rit   I   dessay   sittin'   there   actin'   a   livin'   lie   before   your   own   wife 

Thomas Simmons as though I couldn't see through you like a book a lot 

you   care   about   overworkin'   me   as   long   as   /your/   turn's   served   throwin' 

away   money   like   dirt   in   the   street   on   a   lot   o'   swindlin'   tailors   an'   me 

workin' and' slavin' 'ere to save a 'a'penny an' this is my return for it any 

one 'ud think you could pick up money in the 'orse´road an' I b'lieve I'd be 

thought better of if I laid in bed all day like some would that I do。; So that 

Thomas       Simmons      avoided     the  subject�察  �nor   even    murmured      when     she 

resolved to cut his hair。 

     So   his   placid   fortune   endured   for   years。   Then   there   came   a   golden 

summer evening when Mrs。 Simmons betook herself with a basket to do 

some small shopping�察�and Simmons was left at home。 He washed and put 

away   the   tea´things�察  �and     then   he   fell   to   meditating   on   a   new   pair   of 

trousers�察  �finished   that   day�察  �and   hanging   behind   the   parlour   door。   There 

they hung�察�in all their decent innocence of shape in the seat�察�and they were 

shorter of leg�察�longer of waist�察�and wilder of pattern than he had ever worn 

before。 And as he looked on them the small devil of Original Sin awoke 

and clamoured in his breast。 He was ashamed of it�察�of course�察�for well he 

knew the gratitude he owed his wife for those same trousers�察�among other 

blessings。 Still�察�there the small devil was�察�and the small devil was fertile in 

base suggestions�察�and could not be kept from hinting at the new crop of 

workshop gibes that would spring at Tommy's first public appearance in 

such things。 

     ;Pitch 'em in the dust´bin� ─�said the small devil at last。 ;It's all they're 

fit for。; 

     Simmons   turned   away   in   sheer   horror   of   his   wicked   self�察  �and   for   a 

moment thought of washing the tea´things over again by way of discipline。 

Then he made for the back room�察�but saw from the landing that the front 

door was standing open�察�probably the fault of the child downstairs。 Now a 

front door standing open was a thing that Mrs。 Simmons would /not/ abide�此�

it looked low。 So Simmons went down�察�that she might not be wroth with 

him for the thing when she came back�察�and�察�as he shut the door�察�he looked 

forth into the street。 

     A man was loitering on the pavement�察�and prying curiously about the 



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door。   His   face   was   tanned�察  �his   hands   were   deep   in   the   pockets   of   his 

unbraced   blue   trousers�察  �and   well   back   on   his   head   he   wore   the   high´ 

crowned   peaked   cap�察  �topped   with   a   knob   of   wool�察  �which   is   affected   by 

Jack   ashore   about   the   docks。   He   lurched   a   step   nearer   to   the   door�察  �and 

;Mrs。 Ford ain't in�察�is she�拭─�he said。 

     Simmons   stared   at   him   for   a   matter   of   five   seconds�察  �and   then   said�察�

;Eh�拭─�

     ;Mrs。 Ford as was�察�thenSimmons now�察�ain't it�拭─�

     He    said    this  with    a  furtive   leer   that   Simmons       neither   liked    nor 

understood。 

     ;No�察─�said Simmons�察 �she ain't in now。; 

     ;You ain't her 'usband�察�are ye�拭─�

     ;Yus。; 

     The man took his pipe from his mouth and grinned silently and long。 

;Blimy�察─�he said at length�察 �you look like the sort o' bloke she'd like�察─�and 

with that he grinned again。 Then�察�seeing that Simmons made ready to shut 

the door�察�he put a foot on the sill and a hand against the panel。 ;Don't be in 

a 'hurry�察�matey�察─�he said�察 �I come 'ere t' 'ave a little talk with you�察�man to 

man�察�d' ye see�拭─�And he frowned fiercely。 

     Tommy Simmons felt uncomfortable�察�but the door would not shut�察�so 

he parleyed。 ;Wotjer want�拭─�he asked�察 �I dunno you。; 

     ;Then�察�if you'll excuse the liberty�察�I'll interdooce meself�察�in a manner 

of speaking。; He touched his cap with a bob of mock humility。 ;I'm Bob 

Ford�察─�he said�察 �come back out o' kingdom come so   to say。 Me as   went 

down   with   the   /Mooltan/safe   dead   five   year   gone。   I   come   to   see   my 

wife。; 

     During   this   speech   Thomas   Simmons's   jaw   was   dropping   lower   and 

lower。 At   the  end   of   it   he   poked   his   fingers   up   through   his   hair�察  �looked 

down at the mat�察�then up at the fanlight�察�then out into the street�察�then hard 

at his visitor。 But he found nothing to say。 

     ;Come   to   see   my   wife�察─  �the   man   repeated。   ;So   now   we   can   talk   it 

over as man to man。; 

     Simmons         slowly     shut    his    mouth�察    �and     led   the    way     upstairs 

mechanically�察  �his   fingers   still   in   his   hair。 A  sense   of   the   state   of   affairs 



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sank gradually into his brain�察�and the small devil woke again。 Suppose this 

man /was/ Ford�拭�Suppose he /did/ claim his wife�拭�Would it be a knock´ 

down blow�拭�Would it hit him out��or not�拭�He thought of the trousers�察�the 

tea´things�察�the mangling�察�the knives�察�the kettles�察�and the windows�察�and he 

thought of them in the way of a backslider。 

     On the landing Ford clutched at his arm�察�and asked in a hoarse whisper�察�

; 'Ow long 'fore she's back�拭─�

     ; 'Bout an hour�察�I expect�察─�Simmons replied�察�having first of all repeated 

the question in his own mind。 And then he opened the parlour door。 

     ;Ah�察─  �said   Ford�察  �looking   about   him�察   �you've   bin   pretty   comf'table。 

Them chairs an' things�察─�jerking his pipe toward them�察 �was hers mine�察�

that   is   to   say�察  �speakin'  straight�察  �and   man   to   man。;   He   sat   down�察  �puffing 

meditatively at his pipe�察�and presently�察 �Well�察─�he continued�察 ─�'ere I am 

agin�察�ol' Bob Ford�察�dead an' done forgone down in the /Mooltan/。 On'y I 

/ain't/ done for�察�see�拭─�And he pointed the stem of his pipe at Simmons's 

waistcoat。 ;I ain't done for�察�'cause why�拭�Cons'kence o' bein' picked up by a 

ol'   German   sailin'´'utch   an'   took   to   'Frisco   'fore   the   mast。   I've   'ad   a   few 

years o' knockin' about since then�察�an' now;looking hard at Simmons 

;I've come back to see my wife。; 

     ;Sheshe      don't  like   smoke    in  'ere�察─ �said   Simmons�察     �as  it  were    at 

random。 

     ;No�察�I bet she don't�察─�Ford answered�察�taking his pipe from his mouth 

and holding it low in his hand。 ;I know 'Anner。 'Ow d' you find 'her�拭�Do 

she make ye clean the winders�拭─�

     ;Well�察─  �Simmons   admitted�察  �uneasily�察   �II   do   'elp   'er   sometimes�察  �o' 

course。; 

     ;Ah� �An' the knives too�察�I bet�察�an' the bloomin' kittles。 I know。 W'y; 

he rose and bent to look behind Simmons's head;s' 'elp me�察�I b'lieve she 

cuts yer 'air� �Well�察�I'm dammed� �Jes' wot she would do�察�too。; 

     He   inspected   the   blushing   Simmons   from   divers   points   of   vantage。 

Then   he   lifted   a   leg   of   the   trousers   hanging   behind   the   door。   ;I'd   bet   a 

trifle�察─�he said�察 �she made these 'ere trucks。 No´body else 'ud do 'em like 

that。 Damme� �they're wuss'n wot you're got on。; 

     The   small   devil   began   to   have   the   argument   all   its   own   way。   If   this 



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man took his wife back perhaps he'd have to wear those trousers。 

     ;Ah�察─  �Ford   pursued�察   �she   ain't   got   no   milder。   An'�察  �my   davy�察  �wot   a 

jore� ─�

     Simmons   began to   feel that this   was   no   longer  his   business。  Plainly�察�

'Anner     was    this  other    man's   wife�察  �and    he   was   bound     in  honour    to 

acknowledge the fact。 The small devil put it to him as a matter of duty。 

     ;Well�察─�said Ford�察�suddenly�察 �time's short an' this ain't business。 I won't 

be 'ard on you�察�matey。 I ought prop'ly to stand on my rights�察�but seein' as 

you're a well´meaning young man�察�so to speak�察�an' all settled an' a´livin' 

'ere quiet an' matrimonual�察�I'll;this with a burst of generosity;damme� �

yus�察�I'll compound the felony an' take me 'ook。 Come�察�I'll name a figure�察�as 

man to man�察�fust an' last�察�no less an' no more。 Five pound does it。; 

     Simmons hadn't five pounds��he hadn't even fivepence��and he said 

so。 ;An' I wouldn't think to come between a man an' 'is wife�察─�he added�察�

;not on no account。 It may be rough on me�察�but it's a dooty。 /I'll/ 'ook it。; 

     ;No�察─�said Ford�察�hastily�察�clutching Simmons by the arm�察 �don't do that。 

I'll make it a bit cheaper。 Say three quidcome�察�that's reasonable�察�ain't it�拭�

Three quid ain't much compensation for me goin' away for everwhere the 

stormy winds do blow�察�so to sayan' never as much as seein' me own wife 

agin for better nor wuss。 Between man an' man�察�now�察�three quid�察�an' I'll 

shunt。 That's fair�察�ain't it�拭─�

     ;Of course it's fair�察─�Simmons replied�察�effusively。 ;It's more'n fair�此�it

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