short stories and essays-第9章

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chute；　and　I　made　haste　to　experience　the　variety　these　afforded；
beginning　with　the　chute；　since　the　sea　was　always　there；　and　the　chute
might　be　closed　for　the　day　if　I　waited　to　view　it　last。　　I　meant　only　to
enjoy　the　pleasure　of　others　in　it；　and　I　confined　my　own　participation
to　the　ascent　of　the　height　from　which　the　boat　plunges　down　the　watery
steep　into　the　oblong　pool　below。　　When　I　bought　my　ticket　for　the　car
that　carried　passengers　up；　they　gave　me　also　a　pasteboard　medal；
certifying　for　me；　〃You　have　shot　the　chute；〃　and　I　resolved　to　keep　this
and　show　it　to　doubting　friends　as　a　proof　of　my　daring；　but　it　is　a
curious　evidence　of　my　unfitness　for　such　deceptions　that　I　afterwards
could　not　find　the　medal。　　So　I　will　frankly　own　that　for　me　it　was　quite
enough　to　see　others　shoot　the　chute；　and　that　I　came　tamely　down　myself
in　the　car。　　There　is　a　very　charming　view　from　the　top；　of　the　sea　with
its　ships；　and　all　the　mad　gayety　of　the　shore；　but　of　course　my　main
object　was　to　exult　in　the　wild　absurdity　of　those　who　shot　the　chute。
There　was　always　a　lady　among　the　people　in　the　clumsy　flat…boat　that
flew　down　the　long　track；　and　she　tried　usually　to　be　a　pretty　girl；　who
clutched　her　friends　and　lovers　and　shrieked　aloud　in　her　flight；　but
sometimes　it　was　a　sober　mother　of　a　family；　with　her　brood　about　her；
who　was　probably　meditating；　all　the　way；　the　inculpation　of　their　father
for　any　harm　that　came　of　it。　　Apparently　no　harm　came　of　it　in　any　case。

The　boat　struck　the　water　with　the　impetus　gained　from　a　half…
perpendicular　slide　of　a　hundred　feet；　bounded　high　into　the　air；　struck
again　and　again；　and　so　flounced　awkwardly　across　the　pond　to　the　farther
shore；　where　the　passengers　debarked　and　went　away　to　commune　with　their
viscera；　and　to　get　their　breath　as　they　could。　　I　did　not　ask　any　of
them　what　their　emotions　or　sensations　were；　but；　so　far　as　I　could
conjecture；　the　experience　of　shooting　the　chute　must　comprise　the　rare
transport　of　a　fall　from　a　ten…story　building　and　the　delight　of　a
tempestuous　passage　of　the　Atlantic；　powerfully　condensed。

The　mere　sight　was　so　athletic　that　it　took　away　any　appetite　I　might
have　had　to　witness　the　feats　of　strength　performed　by　Madame　La　Noire　at
the　nearest　booth　on　my　coming　out；　though　madame　herself　was　at　the
door…to　testify；　in　her　own　living　picture；　how　much　muscular　force　may
be　masked　in　vast　masses　of　adipose。　　She　had　a　weary；　bored　look；　and
was　not　without　her　pathos；　poor　soul；　as　few　of　those　are　who　amuse　the
public；　but　I　could　not　find　her　quite　justifiable　as　a　Sunday
entertainment。　　One　forgot；　however；　what　day　it　was；　and　for　the　time　I
did　not　pretend　to　be　so　much　better　than　my　neighbors　that　I　would　not
compromise　upon　a　visit　to；　an　animal　show　a　little　farther　on。　　It　was　a
pretty　fair　collection　of　beasts　that　had　once　been　wild；　perhaps；　and　in
the　cage　of　the　lions　there　was　a　slight；　sad…looking；　long…haired　young
man；　exciting　them　to　madness　by　blows　of　a　whip　and　pistol…shots　whom　I
was　extremely　glad　to　have　get　away　without　being　torn　in　pieces；　or　at
least　bitten　in　two。　　A　little　later　I　saw　him　at　the　door　of　the　tent；
very　breathless；　dishevelled；　and　as　to　his　dress　not　of　the　spotlessness
one　could　wish。　　But　perhaps　spotlessness　is　not　compatible　with　the
intimacy　of　lions　and　lionesses。　　He　had　had　his　little　triumph；　one
spectator　of　his　feat　had　declared　that　you　would　not　see　anything　like
that　at　Coney　Island；　and　soiled　and　dusty　as　he　was　in　his　cotton
tights；　he　was　preferable　to　the　living　picture　of　a　young　lady　whom　he
replaced　as　an　attraction　of　the　show。　　It　was　professedly　a　moral　show；
the　manager　exhorted　us　as　we　came　out　to　say　whether　it　was　good　or　not；
and　in　the　box…office　sat　a　kind　and　motherly　faced　matron　who　would　have
apparently　abhorred　to　look　upon　a　living　picture　at　any　distance；　much
less　have　it　at　her　elbow。

Upon　the　whole；　there　seemed　a　melancholy　mistake　in　it　all；　the　people
to　whom　the　showmen　made　their　appeal　were　all　so　much　better；　evidently；
than　the　showmen　supposed；　the　showmen　themselves　appeared　harmless
enough；　and　one　could　not　say　that　there　was　personally　any　harm　in　the
living　picture；　rather　she　looked　listless　and　dull；　but　as　to　the　face
respectable　enough。

I　would　not　give　the　impression　that　most　of　the　amusements　were　not　in
every　respect　decorous。　　As　a　means　of　pleasure；　the　merry…go…round；　both
horizontal　with　horses　and　vertical　with　swinging　cradles；　prevailed；　and
was　none　the　worse　for　being　called　by　the　French　name　of　carrousel；　for
our　people　aniglicize　the　word；　and　squeeze　the　last　drop　of　Gallic
wickedness　from　it　by　pronouncing　it　carousal。　　At　every　other　step　there
were　machines　for　weighing　you　and　ascertaining　your　height；　there　were
photographers'　booths；　and　X…ray　apparatus　for　showing　you　the　inside　of
your　watch；　and　in　one　open　tent　I　saw　a　gentleman　（with　his　back　to　the
public）　having　his　fortune　read　in　the　lines　of　his　hand　by　an　Egyptian
seeress。　　Of　course　there　was　everywhere　soda；　and　places　of　the　softer
drinks　abounded。




III。

I　think　you　could　only　get　a　hard　drink　by　ordering　something　to　eat　and
sitting　down　to　your　wine　or　beer　at　a　table。　　Again　I　say　that　I　saw　no
effects　of　drink　in　the　crowd；　and　in　one　of　the　great　restaurants　built
out　over　the　sea　on　piers；　where　there　was　perpetual　dancing　to　the
braying　of　a　brass…band；　the　cotillon　had　no　fire　imparted　to　its　figures
by　the　fumes　of　the　bar。　　In　fact　it　was　a　very　rigid　sobriety　that
reigned　here；　governing　the　common　behavior　by　means　of　the　placards
which　hung　from　the　roof　over　the　heads　of　the　dancers；　and　repeatedly
announced　that　gentlemen　were　not　allowed　to　dance　together；　or　to　carry
umbrellas　or　canes　while　dancing；　while　all　were　entreated　not　to　spit　on
the　floor。

The　dancers　looked　happy　and　harmless；　if　not　very　wise　or　splendid；　they
seemed　people　of　the　same　simple　neighborhoods；　village　lovers；　young
wives　and　husbands；　and　parties　of　friends　who　had　come　together　for　the
day's　pleasure。　　A　slight　mother；　much　weighed　down　by　a　heavy　baby；
passed；　rapt　in　an　innocent　envy　of　them；　and　I　think　she　and　the　child's
father　meant　to　join　them　as　soon　as　they　could　find　a　place　where　to　lay
it。　　Almost　any　place　would　do；　at　another　great　restaurant　I　saw　two
chairs　faced　together；　and　a　baby　sleeping　on　them　as　quietly　amid　the
coming　and　going　of　lagers　and　frankfurters　as　if　in　its　cradle　at　home。

Lagers　and　frankfurters　were　much　in　evidence　everywhere；　especially
frankfurters；　which　seemed　to　have　whole　booths　devoted　to　broiling　them。
They　disputed　this　dignity　with　soft…shell　crabs；　and　sections　of　eels；
piled　attractively　on　large　platters；　or　sizzling　to　an　impassioned　brown
in　deep　skillets　of　fat。　　The　old　acrid　smell　of　frying　brought　back　many
holidays　of　Italy　to　me；　and　I　was　again　at　times　on　the　Riva　at　Venice；
and　in　the　Mercato　Vecchio　at　Florence。　　But　the　Continental　Sunday
cannot　be　felt　to　have　quite　replaced　the　old　American　Sabbath　yet；　the
Puritan　leaven　works　still；　and　though　so　many　of　our　own　people　consent
willingly　to　the　transformation；　I　fancy　they　always　enjoy　themselves　on
Sunday　with　a　certain　consciousness　of　wrong…doing。




IV。

I　have　already　said　that　the　spectator　quite　lost　sense　of　what　day　it
was。　　Nothing　could　be　more　secular　than　all　the　sights　and　sounds。　　It
was　the　Fourth　of　July；　less　the　fire…crackers　and　the　drunkenness；　and
it　was　the　high　day　of　the　week。　　But　if　it　was　very　wicked；　and　I　must
recognize　that　the　scene　would　be　shocking　to　most　of　my　readers；　I　feel
bound　to　say　that　the　people　themselves　did　not　look　wicked。　　They　looked
harmless；　they　even　looked　good；　the　most　of　them。　　I　am　sorry　to　say
they　were　not　very　good…looking。　　The　women　were　pretty　enough；　and　the
men　were　handsome　enough；　perhaps　the　average　was　higher　in　respect　of
beauty　than　the　average　is　anywhere　else；　I　was　lately　from　New　England；
where　the　people　were　distinctly　more　hard…favored；　but　among　all　those
thousands　at　Rockaway　I　found　no　striking　types。　　It　may　be　that　as　we
grow　older　and　our　satisfaction　with　our　own　looks　wanes；　we　become　more
fastidious　as　to　the　looks　of　others。　　At　any　rate；　there　seems　to　be
much　less　beauty　in　the　world　than　there　was　thirty　or　forty　years　ago。

On　the　other　hand；　the　dresses　seem　indefinitely　prettier；　as　they　should
be　in　compensation。　　When　we　were　all　so　handsome　we　could　well　afford　to
wear　hoops　or　peg…top　trousers；　but　now　it　is　different；　and　the　poor
things　must　eke　out　their　personal　ungainliness　with　all　the　devices　of
the　modiste　and　the　tailor。　　I　do　not　mean　that　there　was　any　distinction
in　the　dress　of　the　crowd；　but　I　saw　nothing　positively　ugly　or
grotesquely　out　of　taste。　　The　costumes　were　as　good　as　the　customs；　and
I　have　already　celebrated　the　manners　of　this　crowd。　　I　believe　I　must
except　the　costumes　of　the　bicyclesses；　who　were　unfailingly　dumpy　in
effect　when　dismounted；　and　who　were　all　the　more　lamentable　for
tottering　about；　in　their　short　skirts；　upon　the　tips　of　their　narrow
little；　sharp…pointed；　silly　high…heeled　shoes。　　How　severe　I　am！
But　those　high　heels　seemed　to　take　all　honesty　from　their　daring　in　the
wholesome　exercise　of　the　wheel；　and　to　keep　them　in　the　tradition　of
cheap　coquetry　still；　and　imbecilly　dependent。




V。

I　have　almost　forgotten　in　the　interest　of　the　human　spectacle　that　there
is　a　sea　somewhere　about　at　Rockaway　Beach；　and　it　is　this　that　the
people　have　come　for。　　I　might　well　forget　that　modest　sea；　it　is　so
built　out　of　sight　by　the　restaurants　and　bath…houses　and　switch…backs
and　shops　that　border　it；　and　by　the　hotels　and　saloons　and　shows　flaring
along　the　road　that　divides　the　village；　and　the　planked　streets　that
intersect　this。　　But　if　you　walk　southward　on　any　of　the　streets；　you
presently　find　the　planks　foundering　in　sand；　which　drifts　far　up　over
them；　and　then　you　find　yourself　in　full　sight　of　the　ocean　and　the　ocean
bathing。　　Swarms　and　heaps　of　people　in　all　lolling　and　lying　and
wallowing　shapes　strew　the　beach；　and　the　water　is　full　of　slopping　and
shouting　and　shrieking　human　creatures；　clinging　with　bare　white　arms　to
the　life…lines　that　run　from　the　shore　to　the　buoys；　beyond　these　the
lifeguard　stays　himself　in　his　boat　with　outspread　oars；　and　rocks　on　the
incoming　surf。

All　that　you　can　say　of　it　is　that　it　is　queer。　　It　is　not　picturesque；
or　poetic；　or　dramatic；　it　is　queer。　　An　enfilading　glance　gives　this
impression　and　no　other；　if　you　go　to　the　balcony　of　the　nearest　marine
restaurant　for　a　flanking　eye…shot；　it　is　still　queer；　with　the　added
effect；　in　all　those　arms　upstretched　to　the　life…lines；　of　frogs'　legs
inverted　in　a　downward　plunge。

On　the　sand　before　this　spectacle　I　talked　with　a　philosopher　of　humble
condition　who　backed　upon　me　and　knocked　my　umbrella　out　of　my　hand。
This　made　us　beg　each　other's　pardon；　he　said　that　he　did　not　know　I　was
there；　and　I　said　it　did　not　matter。　　Then　we　both　looked　at　the　bathing；
and　he　said：

〃I　don't　like　that。〃

〃Why；〃　I　asked；　〃do　you　se