the new machiavelli-第17章

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〃The　Pinky　Dinky　for　all　his　fun　and　levity　has　a　clean　mind。〃



〃A　thoroughly　clean　mind。　　Not　like　Esmeer'sthe　Pig！〃



〃If　once　he　began　to　think　about　sex；　how　could　he　be　comfortable　at　

croquet？〃



〃It's　their　Damned　Modesty；〃　said　Hatherleigh　suddenly；　〃that's　

what's　the　matter　with　the　Pinky　Dinky。　　It's　Mental　Cowardice　

dressed　up　as　a　virtue　and　taking　the　poor　dears　in。　　Cambridge　is　

soaked　with　it；　it's　some　confounded　local　bacillus。　　Like　the　thing　

that　gives　a　flavour　to　Havana　cigars。　　He　comes　up　here　to　be　made　

into　a　man　and　a　ruler　of　the　people；　and　he　thinks　it　shows　a　nice　

disposition　not　to　take　on　the　job！　　How　the　Devil　is　a　great　Empire　

to　be　run　with　men　like　him？〃



〃All　his　little　jokes　and　things；〃　said　Esmeer　regarding　his　feet　on　

the　fender；　〃it's　just　a　nervous　sniggeringbecause　he's　afraid。　。　。　。　　

Oxford's　no　better。〃



〃What's　he　afraid　of？〃　said　I。



〃God　knows！〃　exploded　Hatherleigh　and　stared　at　the　fire。



〃LIFE！〃　said　Esmeer。　　〃And　so　in　a　way　are　we；〃　he　added；　and　made　a　

thoughtful　silence　for　a　time。



〃I　say；〃　began　Carter；　who　was　doing　the　Natural　Science　Tripos；　

〃what　is　the　adult　form　of　the　Pinky　Dinky？〃



But　there　we　were　checked　by　our　ignorance　of　the　world。



〃What　is　the　adult　form　of　any　of　us？〃　asked　Benton；　voicing　the　

thought　that　had　arrested　our　flow。







3





I　do　not　remember　that　we　ever　lifted　our　criticism　to　the　dons　and　

the　organisation　of　the　University。　　I　think　we　took　them　for　

granted。　　When　I　look　back　at　my　youth　I　am　always　astonished　by　the　

multitude　of　things　that　we　took　for　granted。　　It　seemed　to　us　that　

Cambridge　was　in　the　order　of　things；　for　all　the　world　like　having　

eyebrows　or　a　vermiform　appendix。　　Now　with　the　larger　scepticism　of　

middle　age　I　can　entertain　very　fundamental　doubts　about　these　old　

universities。　　Indeed　I　had　a　scheme



I　do　not　see　what　harm　I　can　do　now　by　laying　bare　the　purpose　of　

the　political　combinations　I　was　trying　to　effect。



My　educational　scheme　was　indeed　the　starting…point　of　all　the　big　

project　of　conscious　public　reconstruction　at　which　I　aimed。　　I　

wanted　to　build　up　a　new　educational　machine　altogether　for　the　

governing　class　out　of　a　consolidated　system　of　special　public　

service　schools。　　I　meant　to　get　to　work　upon　this　whatever　office　I　

was　given　in　the　new　government。　　I　could　have　begun　my　plan　from　

the　Admiralty　or　the　War　Office　quite　as　easily　as　from　the　

Education　Office。　　I　am　firmly　convinced　it　is　hopeless　to　think　of　

reforming　the　old　public　schools　and　universities　to　meet　the　needs　

of　a　modern　state；　they　send　their　roots　too　deep　and　far；　the　cost　

would　exceed　any　good　that　could　possibly　be　effected；　and　so　I　have　

sought　a　way　round　this　invincible　obstacle。　　I　do　think　it　would　be　

quite　practicable　to　side…track；　as　the　Americans　say；　the　whole　

system　by　creating　hardworking；　hard…living；　modern　and　scientific　

boys'　schools；　first　for　the　Royal　Navy　and　then　for　the　public　

service　generally；　and　as　they　grew；　opening　them　to　the　public　

without　any　absolute　obligation　to　subsequent　service。　　

Simultaneously　with　this　it　would　not　be　impossible　to　develop　a　new　

college　system　with　strong　faculties　in　modern　philosophy；　modern　

history；　European　literature　and　criticism；　physical　and　biological　

science；　education　and　sociology。



We　could　in　fact　create　a　new　liberal　education　in　this　way；　and　cut　

the　umbilicus　of　the　classical　languages　for　good　and　all。　　I　should　

have　set　this　going；　and　trusted　it　to　correct　or　kill　the　old　

public　schools　and　the　Oxford　and　Cambridge　tradition　altogether。　　I　

had　men　in　my　mind　to　begin　the　work；　and　I　should　have　found　

others。　　I　should　have　aimed　at　making　a　hard…trained；　capable；　

intellectually　active；　proud　type　of　man。　　Everything　else　would　

have　been　made　subservient　to　that。　　I　should　have　kept　my　grip　on　

the　men　through　their　vacation；　and　somehow　or　other　I　would　have　

contrived　a　young　woman　to　match　them。　　I　think　I　could　have　seen　to　

it　effectually　enough　that　they　didn't　get　at　croquet　and　tennis　

with　the　vicarage　daughters　and　discover　sex　in　the　Peeping　Tom　

fashion　I　did；　and　that　they　realised　quite　early　in　life　that　it　

isn't　really　virile　to　reek　of　tobacco。　　I　should　have　had　military　

manoeuvres；　training　ships；　aeroplane　work；　mountaineering　and　so　

forth；　in　the　place　of　the　solemn　trivialities　of　games；　and　I　

should　have　fed　and　housed　my　men　clean　and　very　hardwhere　there　

wasn't　any　audit　ale；　no　credit　tradesmen；　and　plenty　of　high　

pressure　douches。　。　。　。



I　have　revisited　Cambridge　and　Oxford　time　after　time　since　I　came　

down；　and　so　far　as　the　Empire　goes；　I　want　to　get　clear　of　those　

two　places。　。　。　。



Always　I　renew　my　old　feelings；　a　physical　oppression；　a　sense　of　

lowness　and　dampness　almost　exactly　like　the　feeling　of　an　

underground　room　where　paper　moulders　and　leaves　the　wall；　a　feeling　

of　ineradicable　contagion　in　the　Gothic　buildings；　in　the　narrow　

ditch…like　rivers；　in　those　roads　and　roads　of　stuffy　little　villas。　　

Those　little　villas　have　destroyed　all　the　good　of　the　old　monastic　

system　and　none　of　its　evil。　。　。　。



Some　of　the　most　charming　people　in　the　world　live　in　them；　but　

their　collective　effect　is　below　the　quality　of　any　individual　among　

them。　　Cambridge　is　a　world　of　subdued　tones；　of　excessively　subtle　

humours；　of　prim　conduct　and　free　thinking；　it　fears　the　Parent；　but　

it　has　no　fear　of　God；　it　offers　amidst　surroundings　that　vary　

between　disguises　and　antiquarian　charm　the　inflammation　of　

literature's　purple　draught；　one　hears　there　a　peculiar　thin　scandal　

like　no　other　scandal　in　the　worlda　covetous　scandalso　that　I　am　

always　reminded　of　Ibsen　in　Cambridge。　　In　Cambridge　and　the　plays　

of　Ibsen　alone　does　it　seem　appropriate　for　the　heroine　before　the　

great　crisis　of　life　to　〃enter；　take　off　her　overshoes；　and　put　her　

wet　umbrella　upon　the　writing　desk。〃　。　。　。



We　have　to　make　a　new　Academic　mind　for　modern　needs；　and　the　last　

thing　to　make　it　out　of；　I　am　convinced；　is　the　old　Academic　mind。　　

One　might　as　soon　try　to　fake　the　old　VICTORY　at　Portsmouth　into　a　

line　of　battleship　again。　　Besides　which　the　old　Academic　mind；　like　

those　old　bathless；　damp　Gothic　colleges；　is　much　too　delightful　in　

its　peculiar　and　distinctive　way　to　damage　by　futile　patching。



My　heart　warms　to　a　sense　of　affectionate　absurdity　as　I　recall　dear　

old　Codger；　surely　the　most　〃unleaderly〃　of　men。　　No　more　than　from　

the　old　Schoolmen；　his　kindred；　could　one　get　from　him　a　School　for　

Princes。　　Yet　apart　from　his　teaching　he　was　as　curious　and　adorable　

as　a　good　Netsuke。　　Until　quite　recently　he　was　a　power　in　

Cambridge；　he　could　make　and　bar　and　destroy；　and　in　a　way　he　has　

become　the　quintessence　of　Cambridge　in　my　thoughts。



I　see　him　on　his　way　to　the　morning's　lecture；　with　his　plump　

childish　face；　his　round　innocent　eyes；　his　absurdly　non…prehensile　

fat　hand　carrying　his　cap；　his　grey　trousers　braced　up　much　too　

high；　his　feet　a　trifle　inturned；　and　going　across　the　great　court　

with　a　queer　tripping　pace　that　seemed　cultivated　even　to　my　naive　

undergraduate　eye。　　Or　I　see　him　lecturing。　　He　lectured　walking　up　

and　down　between　the　desks；　talking　in　a　fluting　rapid　voice；　and　

with　the　utmost　lucidity。　　If　he　could　not　walk　up　and　down　he　could　

not　lecture。　　His　mind　and　voice　had　precisely　the　fluid　quality　of　

some　clear　subtle　liquid；　one　felt　it　could　flow　round　anything　and　

overcome　nothing。　　And　its　nimble　eddies　were　wonderful！　　Or　again　I　

recall　him　drinking　port　with　little　muscular　movements　in　his　neck　

and　cheek　and　chin　and　his　brows　knitvery　judicial；　very　

concentrated；　preparing　to　say　the　apt　just　thing；　it　was　the　last　

thing　he　would　have　told　a　lie　about。



When　I　think　of　Codger　I　am　reminded　of　an　inscription　I　saw　on　some　

occasion　in　Regent's　Park　above　two　eyes　scarcely　more　limpidly　

innocent　than　his〃Born　in　the　Menagerie。〃　　Never　once　since　Codger　

began　to　display　the　early　promise　of　scholarship　at　the　age　of　

eight　or　more；　had　he　been　outside　the　bars。　　His　utmost　travel　had　

been　to　lecture　here　and　lecture　there。　　His　student　phase　had　

culminated　in　papers　of　quite　exceptional　brilliance；　and　he　had　

gone　on　to　lecture　with　a　cheerful　combination　of　wit　and　mannerism　

that　had　made　him　a　success　from　the　beginning。　　He　has　lectured　

ever　since。　　He　lectures　still。　　Year　by　year　he　has　become　plumper；　

more　rubicund　and　more　and　more　of　an　item　for　the　intelligent　

visitor　to　see。　　Even　in　my　time　he　was　pointed　out　to　people　as　

part　of　our　innumerable　enrichments；　and　obviously　he　knew　it。　　He　

has　become　now　almost　the　leading　Character　in　a　little　donnish　

world　of　much　too　intensely　appreciated　Characters。



He　boasted　he　took　no　exercise；　and　also　of　his　knowledge　of　port　

wine。　　Of　other　wines　he　confessed　quite　frankly　he　had　no　〃special　

knowledge。〃　　Beyond　these　things　he　had　little　pride　except　that　he　

claimed　to　have　read　every　novel　by　a　woman　writer　that　had　ever　

entered　the　Union　Library。　　This；　however；　he　held　to　be　remarkable　

rather　than　ennobling；　and　such　boasts　as　he　made　of　it　were　tinged　

with　playfulness。　　Certainly　he　had　a　scholar's　knowledge　of　the　

works　of　Miss　Marie　Corelli；　Miss　Braddon；　Miss　Elizabeth　Glyn　and　

Madame　Sarah　Grand　that　would　have　astonished　and　flattered　those　

ladies　enormously；　and　he　loved　nothing　so　much　in　his　hours　of　

relaxation　as　to　propound　and　answer　difficult　questions　upon　their　

books。　　Tusher　of　King's　was　his　ineffectual　rival　in　this　field；　

their　bouts　were　memorable　and　rarely　other　than　glorious　for　

Codger；　but　then　Tusher　spread　himself　too　much；　he　also　undertook　

to　rehearse　whole　pages　out　of　Bradshaw；　and　tell　you　with　all　the　

changes　how　to　get　from　any　station　to　any　station　in　Great　Britain　

by　the　nearest　and　cheapest　routes。　。　。　。



Codger　lodged　with　a　little　deaf　innocent　old　lady；　Mrs。　Araminta　

Mergle；　who　was　understood　to　be　herself　a　very　redoubtable　

Character　in　the　Gyp…Bedder　class；　about　her　he　related　quietly　

absurd　anecdotes。　　He　displayed　a　marvellous　invention　in　ascribing　

to　her　plausible　expressions　of　opinion　entirely　identical　in　import　

with　those　of　the　Oxford　and　Harvard　Pragmatists；　against　whom　he　

waged　a　fierce　obscure　war。　。　。　。



It　was　Codger's　function　to　teach　me　philosophy；　philosophy！　the　

intimate　wisdom　of　things。　　He　dealt　in　a　variety　of　Hegelian　stuff　

like　nothing　else　in　the　world；　but　marvellously　consistent　with　

itself。　　It　was　a　wonderful　web　he　spun　out　of　that　queer　big　active　

childish　brain　that　had　never　lusted　nor　hated　nor　grieved　nor　

feared　nor　passionately　loved；a　web　of　iridescent　threads。　　He　had　

luminous　final　theori