stories by english authors-orient (英国作家故事集)-第3章
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/Therefore/ we are going away to be Kings。〃
〃Kings in our own right；〃 muttered Dravot。
〃Yes； of course；〃 I said。 〃You've been tramping in the sun； and it's a
very warm night； and hadn't you better sleep over the notion？ Come to…
morrow。〃
〃Neither drunk nor sunstruck；〃 said Dravot。 〃We have slept over the
notion half a year； and require to see Books and Atlases； and we have
decided that there is only one place now in the world that two strong men
can Sar…a…/whack/。 They call it Kafiristan。 By my reckoning it's the top
right…hand corner of Afghanistan； not more than three hundred miles from
Peshawar。 They have two and thirty heathen idols there； and we'll be the
thirty…third and fourth。 It's a mountaineous country； the women of those
parts are very beautiful。〃
〃But that is provided against in the Contrack；〃 said Carnehan。 〃Neither
Women nor Liqu…or； Daniel。〃
〃And that's all we know； except that no one has gone there； and they
fight； and in any place where they fight a man who knows how to drill
men can always be a King。 We shall go to those parts and say to any King
we find； 'D' you want to vanquish your foes？' and we will show him how
to drill men； for that we know better than anything else。 Then we will
subvert that King and seize his Throne and establish a Dy…nasty。〃
〃You'll be cut to pieces before you're fifty miles across the Border；〃 I
said。 〃You have to travel through Afghanistan to get to that country。 It's
one mass of mountains and peaks and glaciers； and no Englishman has
been through it。 The people are utter brutes； and even if you reached them
you couldn't do anything。〃 〃That's more like；〃 said Carnehan。 〃If you
could think us a little more mad we would be more pleased。 We have come
to you to know about this country； to read a book about it； and to be shown
maps。 We want you to tell us that we are fools and to show us your
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books。〃 He turned to the bookcases。
〃Are you at all in earnest？〃 I said。
〃A little；〃 said Dravot； sweetly。 〃As big a map as you have got； even if
it's all blank where Kafiristan is； and any books you've got。 We can read；
though we aren't very educated。〃
I uncased the big thirty…two…miles…to…the…inch map of India and two
smaller Frontier maps； hauled down volume INF…KAN of the
〃Encyclopaedia Britannica；〃 and the men consulted them。
〃See here！〃 said Dravot； his thumb on the map。 〃Up to Jagdallak；
Peachey and me know the road。 We was there with Robert's Army。 We'll
have to turn off to the right at Jagdallak through Laghmann territory。 Then
we get among the hillsfourteen thousand feetfifteen thousand it will
be cold work there； but it don't look very far on the map。〃
I handed him Wood on the 〃Sources of the Oxus。〃 Carnehan was deep
in the 〃Encyclopaedia。〃
〃They're a mixed lot；〃 said Dravot； reflectively； 〃and it won't help us
to know the names of their tribes。 The more tribes the more they'll fight；
and the better for us。 From Jagdallak to Ashang。 H'mm！〃
〃But all the information about the country is as sketchy and inaccurate
as can be；〃 I protested。 〃No one knows anything about it really。 Here's the
file of the 'United Services' Institute。' Read what Bellew says。〃
〃Blow Bellew！〃 said Carnehan。 〃Dan； they're a stinkin' lot of heathens；
but this book here says they think they're related to us English。〃
I smoked while the men poured over Raverty； Wood； the maps； and the
〃Encyclopaedia。〃
〃There is no use your waiting；〃 said Dravot； politely。 〃It's about four
o'clock now。 We'll go before six o'clock if you want to sleep； and we won't
steal any of the papers。 Don't you sit up。 We're two harmless lunatics； and
if you come to…morrow evening down to the Serai we'll say good…bye to
you。〃
〃You /are/ two fools；〃 I answered。 〃You'll be turned back at the
Frontier or cut up the minute you set foot in Afghanistan。 Do you want any
money or a recommendation down…country？ I can help you to the chance
of work next week。〃
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〃Next week we shall be hard at work ourselves； thank you；〃 said
Dravot。 〃It isn't so easy being a King as it looks。 When we've got our
Kingdom in going order we'll let you know； and you can come up and help
us govern it。〃
〃Would two lunatics make a Contrack like that？〃 said Carnehan； with
subdued pride； showing me a greasy half…sheet of notepaper on which was
written the following。 I copied it； then and there； as a curiosity。
This Contracx between me and you persuing witnesseth in the
name of GodAmen and so forth。
（One） That me and you will settle this matter
together； i。e。； to be Kings of Kafiristan。
（Two） That you and me will not； while this
matter is being settled； look at any Liquor； nor any
Woman； black； white； or brown； so as to get mixed up
with one or the other harmful。
（Three） That we conduct ourselves with Dignity
and Discretion； and if one of us gets into trouble the
other will stay by him。
Signed by you and me this day。 Peachey
Taliaferro Carnehan。 Daniel Dravot。
Both Gentlemen at Large。
〃There was no need for the last article；〃 said Carnehan； blushing
modestly； 〃but it looks regular。 Now you know the sort of men that loafers
are；we /are/ loafers； Dan； until we get out of India；and /do/ you think
that we would sign a Contrack like that unless we was in earnest？ We have
kept away from the two things that make life worth having。〃
〃You won't enjoy your lives much longer if you are going to try this
idiotic adventure。 Don't set the office on fire；〃 I said； 〃and go away before
nine o'clock。〃
I left them still poring over the maps and making notes on the back of
the 〃Contrack。〃 〃Be sure to come down to the Serai to…morrow；〃 were
their parting words。
The Kumharsen Serai is the great foursquare sink of humanity where
the strings of camels and horses from the North load and unload。 All the
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nationalities of Central Asia may be found there； and most of the folk of
India proper。 Balkh and Bokhara there meet Bengal and Bombay； and try
to draw eye…teeth。 You can buy ponies； turquoises； Persian pussy… cats；
saddle…bags； fat…tailed sheep； and musk in the Kumharsen Serai； and get
many strange things for nothing。 In the afternoon I went down to see
whether my friends intended to keep their word or were lying there drunk。
A priest attired in fragments of ribbons and rags stalked up to me；
gravely twisting a child's paper whirligig。 Behind him was his servant
bending under the load of a crate of mud toys。 The two were loading up
two camels； and the inhabitants of the Serai watched them with shrieks of
laughter。
〃The priest is mad；〃 said a horse…dealer to me。 〃He is going up to
Kabul to sell toys to the Amir。 He will either be raised to honour or have
his head cut off。 He came in here this morning and has been behaving
madly ever since。〃
〃The witless are under the protection of God；〃 stammered a flat…
cheeked Usbeg in broken Hindi。 〃They foretell future events。〃
〃Would they could have foretold that my caravan would have been cut
up by the Shinwaris almost within shadow of the Pass！〃 grunted the
Eusufzai agent of a Rajputana trading…house whose goods had been
diverted into the hands of other robbers just across the Border； and whose
misfortunes were the laughing…stock of the bazaar。 〃Ohe； priest； whence
come you and whither do you go？〃
〃From Roum have I come；〃 shouted the priest； waving his whirligig；
〃from Roum； blown by the breath of a hundred devils across the sea！ O
thieves； robbers； liars； the blessing of Pir Khan on pigs； dogs； and
perjurers！ Who will take the Protected of God to the North to sell charms
that are never still to the Amir？ The camels shall not gall； the sons shall
not fall sick； and the wives shall remain faithful while they are away； of
the men who give me place in their caravan。 Who will assist me to slipper
the King of the Roos with a golden slipper with a silver heel？ The
protection of Pir Khan be upon his labours！〃 He spread out the skirts of his
gabardine and pirouetted between the lines of tethered horses。
〃There starts a caravan from Peshawar to Kabul in twenty days；
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/Huzrut/；〃 said the Eusufzai trader。 〃My camels go therewith。 Do thou also
go and bring us good luck。〃
〃I will go even now！〃 shouted the priest。 〃I will depart upon my
winged camels； and be at Peshawar in a day！ Ho！ Hazar Mir Khan；〃 he
yelled to his servant； 〃drive out the camels； but let me first mount my
own。〃
He leaped on the back of his beast as it knelt； and； turning round to me；
cried； 〃Come thou also； Sahib； a little along the road； and I will sell thee a
charman amulet that shall make thee King of Kafiristan。〃
Then the light broke upon me； and I followed the two camels out of
the Serai till we reached open road and the priest halted。
〃What d' you think o' that？〃 said he in English。 〃Carnehan can't talk
their patter； so I've made him my servant。 He makes a handsome servant。
'T isn't for nothing that I've been knocking about the country for fourteen
years。 Didn't I do that talk neat？ We'll hitch
