the purcell papers-2-第6章

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moment　to　repent　the　unreserved　confidence

which　I　then　reposed　in　her。　She　was　no

less　surprised　than　I　at　the　unexpected

appearance　of　Edward；　whose　departure

for　France　neither　of　us　had　for　a　moment

doubted；　but　which　was　now　proved　by　his

actual　presence　to　be　nothing　more　than

an　imposture；　practised；　I　feared；　for　no

good　end。



The　situation　in　which　I　had　found　my

uncle　had　removed　completely　all　my

doubts　as　to　his　designs。　I　magnified

suspicions　into　certainties；　and　dreaded　night

after　night　that　I　should　be　murdered　in

my　bed。　The　nervousness　produced　by

sleepless　nights　and　days　of　anxious　fears

increased　the　horrors　of　my　situation　to

such　a　degree；　that　I　at　length　wrote　a

letter　to　a　Mr。　Jefferies；　an　old　and　faithful

friend　of　my　father's；　and　perfectly

acquainted　with　all　his　affairs；　praying　him；

for　God's　sake；　to　relieve　me　from　my

present　terrible　situation；　and　communicating

without　reserve　the　nature　and

grounds　of　my　suspicions。



This　letter　I　kept　sealed　and　directed

for　two　or　three　days　always　about　my

person；　for　discovery　would　have　been

ruinous；　in　expectation　of　an　opportunity

which　might　be　safely　trusted；　whereby　to

have　it　placed　in　the　post…office。　As　neither

Emily　nor　I　were　permitted　to　pass　beyond

the　precincts　of　the　demesne　itself；

which　was　surrounded　by　high　walls

formed　of　dry　stone；　the　difficulty　of

procuring　such　an　opportunity　was　greatly

enhanced。



At　this　time　Emily　had　a　short　conver…

sation　with　her　father；　which　she　reported

to　me　instantly。



After　some　indifferent　matter；　he　had

asked　her　whether　she　and　I　were　upon

good　terms；　and　whether　I　was　unreserved

in　my　disposition。　She　answered　in　the

affirmative；　and　he　then　inquired　whether

I　had　been　much　surprised　to　find　him　in

my　chamber　on　the　other　day。　She

answered　that　I　had　been　both　surprised　and

amused。



'And　what　did　she　think　of　George

Wilson's　appearance？'



'Who？'　inquired　she。



'Oh；　the　architect；'　he　answered；　'who

is　to　contract　for　the　repairs　of　the　house；

he　is　accounted　a　handsome　fellow。'



'She　could　not　see　his　face；'　said　Emily；

'and　she　was　in　such　a　hurry　to　escape

that　she　scarcely　noticed　him。'



Sir　Arthur　appeared　satisfied；　and　the

conversation　ended。



This　slight　conversation；　repeated

accurately　to　me　by　Emily；　had　the　effect　of

confirming；　if　indeed　anything　was　required

to　do　so；　all　that　I　had　before　believed　as

to　Edward's　actual　presence；　and　I　naturally

became；　if　possible；　more　anxious

than　ever　to　despatch　the　letter　to　Mr。

Jefferies。　An　opportunity　at　length　occurred。



As　Emily　and　I　were　walking　one　day

near　the　gate　of　the　demesne；　a　lad　from

the　village　happened　to　be　passing　down

the　avenue　from　the　house；　the　spot　was

secluded；　and　as　this　person　was　not

connected　by　service　with　those　whose

observation　I　dreaded；　I　committed　the　letter

to　his　keeping；　with　strict　injunctions　that

he　should　put　it　without　delay　into　the

receiver　of　the　town　post…office；　at　the

same　time　I　added　a　suitable　gratuity；　and

the　man　having　made　many　protestations

of　punctuality；　was　soon　out　of　sight。



He　was　hardly　gone　when　I　began　to

doubt　my　discretion　in　having　trusted　this

person；　but　I　had　no　better　or　safer　means

of　despatching　the　letter；　and　I　was　not

warranted　in　suspecting　him　of　such

wanton　dishonesty　as　an　inclination　to

tamper　with　it；　but　I　could　not　be　quite

satisfied　of　its　safety　until　I　had　received

an　answer；　which　could　not　arrive　for　a

few　days。　Before　I　did；　however；　an　event

occurred　which　a　little　surprised　me。



I　was　sitting　in　my　bedroom　early　in　the

day；　reading　by　myself；　when　I　heard　a

knock　at　the　door。



'Come　in；'　said　I；　and　my　uncle　entered

the　room。



'Will　you　excuse　me？'　said　he。　'I

sought　you　in　the　parlour；　and　thence　I

have　come　here。　I　desired　to　say　a　word

with　you。　I　trust　that　you　have　hitherto

found　my　conduct　to　you　such　as　that　of　a

guardian　towards　his　ward　should　be。'



I　dared　not　withhold　my　consent。



'And；'　he　continued；　'I　trust　that　you

have　not　found　me　harsh　or　unjust；　and

that　you　have　perceived；　my　dear　niece；

that　I　have　sought　to　make　this　poor　place

as　agreeable　to　you　as　may　be。'



I　assented　again；　and　he　put　his　hand

in　his　pocket；　whence　he　drew　a　folded

paper；　and　dashing　it　upon　the　table　with

startling　emphasis；　he　said：



'Did　you　write　that　letter？'



The　sudden　and　tearful　alteration　of　his

voice；　manner；　and　face；　but；　more　than　all；

the　unexpected　production　of　my　letter　to

Mr。　Jefferies；　which　I　at　once　recognised；

so　confounded　and　terrified　me；　that　I　felt

almost　choking。



I　could　not　utter　a　word。



'Did　you　write　that　letter？'　he　repeated

with　slow　and　intense　emphasis。'　You

did；　liar　and　hypocrite！　You　dared　to

write　this　foul　and　infamous　libel；　but　it

shall　be　your　last。　Men　will　universally

believe　you　mad；　if　I　choose　to　call　for　an

inquiry。　I　can　make　you　appear　so。　The

suspicions　expressed　in　this　letter　are　the

hallucinations　and　alarms　of　moping　lunacy。

I　have　defeated　your　first　attempt；　madam；

and　by　the　holy　God；　if　ever　you　make

another；　chains；　straw；　darkness；　and　the

keeper's　whip　shall　be　your　lasting　portion！'



With　these　astounding　words　he　left　the

room；　leaving　me　almost　fainting。



I　was　now　almost　reduced　to　despair；

my　last　cast　had　failed；　I　had　no　course

left　but　that　of　eloping　secretly　from　the

castle；　and　placing　myself　under　the

protection　of　the　nearest　magistrate。　I　felt

if　this　were　not　done；　and　speedily；　that　I

should　be　MURDERED。



No　one；　from　mere　description；　can　have

an　idea　of　the　unmitigated　horror　of　my

situationa　helpless；　weak；　inexperienced

girl；　placed　under　the　power　and　wholly

at　the　mercy　of　evil　men；　and　feeling　that

she　had　it　not　in　her　power　to　escape　for

a　moment　from　the　malignant　influences

under　which　she　was　probably　fated　to　fall；

and　with　a　consciousness　that　if　violence；

if　murder　were　designed；　her　dying　shriek

would　be　lost　in　void　space；　no　human

being　would　be　near　to　aid　her；　no　human

interposition　could　deliver　her。



I　had　seen　Edward　but　once　during　his

visit；　and　as　I　did　not　meet　with　him

again；　I　began　to　think　that　he　must　have

taken　his　departurea　conviction　which

was　to　a　certain　degree　satisfactory；　as　I

regarded　his　absence　as　indicating　the

removal　of　immediate　danger。



Emily　also　arrived　circuitously　at　the

same　conclusion；　and　not　without　good

grounds；　for　she　managed　indirectly　to

learn　that　Edward's　black　horse　had　actually

been　for　a　day　and　part　of　a　night　in

the　castle　stables；　just　at　the　time　of　her

brother's　supposed　visit。　The　horse　had

gone；　and；　as　she　argued；　the　rider　must

have　departed　with　it。



This　point　being　so　far　settled；　I　felt　a

little　less　uncomfortable：　when　being　one

day　alone　in　my　bedroom；　I　happened　to

look　out　from　the　window；　and；　to　my　un…

utterable　horror；　I　beheld；　peering　through

an　opposite　casement；　my　cousin　Edward's

face。　Had　I　seen　the　evil　one　himself　in

bodily　shape；　I　could　not　have　experienced

a　more　sickening　revulsion。



I　was　too　much　appalled　to　move　at

once　from　the　window；　but　I　did　so　soon

enough　to　avoid　his　eye。　He　was　looking

fixedly　into　the　narrow　quadrangle　upon

which　the　window　opened。　I　shrank　back

unperceived；　to　pass　the　rest　of　the　day

in　terror　and　despair。　I　went　to　my　room

early　that　night；　but　I　was　too　miserable

to　sleep。



At　about　twelve　o'clock；　feeling　very

nervous；　I　determined　to　call　my　cousin

Emily；　who　slept；　you　will　remember；　in

the　next　room；　which　communicated　with

mine　by　a　second　door。　By　this　private

entrance　I　found　my　way　into　her　chamber；

and　without　difficulty　persuaded　her　to

return　to　my　room　and　sleep　with　me。

We　accordingly　lay　down　together；　she

undressed；　and　I　with　my　clothes　on；　for　I

was　every　moment　walking　up　and　down

the　room；　and　felt　too　nervous　and　miserable

to　think　of　rest　or　comfort。



Emily　was　soon　fast　asleep；　and　I　lay

awake；　fervently　longing　for　the　first　pale

gleam　of　morning；　reckoning　every　stroke

of　the　old　clock　with　an　impatience　which

made　every　hour　appear　like　six。



It　must　have　been　about　one　o'clock

when　I　thought　I　heard　a　slight　noise　at

the　partition…door　between　Emily's　room

and　mine；　as　if　caused　by　somebody's

turning　the　key　in　the　lock。　I　held　my

breath；　and　the　same　sound　was　repeated

at　the　second　door　of　my　roomthat　which

opened　upon　the　lobbythe　sound　was

here　distinctly　caused　by　the　revolution　of

the　bolt　in　the　lock；　and　it　was　followed　by

a　slight　pressure　upon　the　door　itself；　as　if

to　ascertain　the　security　of　the　lock。



The　person；　whoever　it　might　be；　was

probably　satisfied；　for　I　heard　the　old

boards　of　the　lobby　creak　and　strain；　as　if

under　the　weight　of　somebody　moving

cautiously　over　them。　My　sense　of　hearing

became　unnaturally；　almost　painfully

acute。　I　suppose　the　imagination　added

distinctness　to　sounds　vague　in　themselves。

I　thought　that　I　could　actually　hear　the

breathing　of　the　person　who　was　slowly

returning　down　the　lobby。　At　the　head　of

the　staircase　there　appeared　to　occur　a

pause；　and　I　could　distinctly　hear　two　or

three　sentences　hastily　whispered；　the

steps　then　descended　the　stairs　with

apparently　less　caution。　I　now　ventured　to

walk　quickly　and　lightly　to　the　lobby…door；

and　attempted　to　open　it；　it　was　indeed

fast　locked　upon　the　outside；　as　was　also

the　other。



I　now　felt　that　the　dreadful　hour　was

come；　but　one　desperate　expedient

remainedit　was　to　awaken　Emily；　and　by

our　united　strength　to　attempt　to　force

the　partition…door；　which　was　slighter　than

the　other；　and　through　this　to　pass　to　the

lower　part　of　the　house；　whence　it　might

be　possible　to　escape　to　the　grounds；　and

forth　to　the　village。



I　returned　to　the　bedside　and　shook

Emily；　but　in　vain。　Nothing　that　I　could

do　availed　to　produce　from　her　more　than

a　few　incoherent　wordsit　was　a　death…

like　sleep。　She　had　certainly　drank　of

some　narcotic；　as　had　I　probably　also；　spite

of　all　the　caution　with　which　I　had

examined　everything　presented　to　us　to

eat　or　drink。



I　now　attempted；　with　as　little　noise　as

possible；　to　force　first　one　door；　then　the

otherbut　all　in　vain。　I　believe　no

strength　could　have　effected　my　object；　for

both　doors　opened　inwards。　I　therefore

collected　whatever　movables　I　could　carry

thither；　and　piled　them　against　the　doors；

so　as　to　assist　me　in　whatever　attempts　I

should　make　to　resist　the　entrance　of　those

without。　I　then　returned　to　the　bed　and

endeavoured　again；　but　fruitlessly；　to

awaken　my　cousin。　It　was　not　sleep；　it

was　torpor；　let