cb.coldheart canyon-第19章

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　 〃…to　see　whether　I　was　dead　or　alive。〃
　 〃…to　look　after　you。〃
　 〃You　never　cared　before；〃　Todd　said；　with　painful　bluntness。　〃Well　did　you？　All　these　years；　when　have　you　ever　e　out　here　and　spent　time　with　me？〃
　 〃I　was　never　wele。〃
　 〃You　were　always　wele。　You　just　never　came　because　you　were　too　fucking　jealous。　Why　don't　you　admit　it？　At　least　once；　between　us；　say　it：　you　were　so　fucking　jealous　you　couldn't　stand　the　idea　of　ing　out　here。〃

　 〃You　know　what？　I　don't　need　to　hear　this；〃　Donnie　said。
　 〃You　should　have　heard　it　years　ago。〃
　 〃I'm　outta　here。〃
　 〃Go　on。　You　did　your　gloating。　Now　you　can　go　home　and　tell　everyone　what　an　asshole　your　brother　is。〃
　 〃I'm　not　going　to　do　that。〃　Donnie　said。　〃You're　still　my　brother；　whatever　you　do。　But　I　can't　help　you　if　you　surround　yourself…〃
　 〃…with　ass…kissers。　Yeah。　You　said　that。〃
　 Todd　heard　Donnie　get　up　and　cross　to　the　door；　dragging　his　feet　as　he　always　had。
　 〃What　are　you　doing？〃　Todd　said。
　 〃I'm　leaving。　Like　I　said　I　would。　You're　going　to　be　fine。　That　faggot　Burrows　will　take　very　good　care　of　you。〃
　 〃Don't　I　get　a　hug　or　something？〃
　 〃Another　time。　When　I　like　you　better；〃　Donnie　said。
　 〃And　when　the　hell　will　that　be？〃　Todd　yelled　after　him。
　 But　all　he　got　by　way　of　reply　was　the　echo　of　his　own　voice　off　the　opposite　wall。　
　
　
　THREE
　 Maxine　turned　up　a　little　after　seven；　and　after　a　few　perfunctory　expressions　of　relief　that　Todd　was　〃back　from　the　dead'；　as　she　indelicately　put　it；　quickly　moved　on　to　the　news　she　was　here　to　debate。
　 〃Somebody　in　this　place　has　a　big　mouth；〃　she　said。　〃I　got　a　call　from　the　editor　of　the　Enquirer　this　afternoon；　asking　if　it　was　true　that　you'd　been　admitted　to　a　private　hospital。　I　told　him　absolutely　not；　this　was　a　lie；　garbage　etc。　etc。　And　I　said　that　if　he　published　that　you　were　in　hospital　or　anything　vaguely　resembling　that；　we'd　sue　him　and　his　wretched　rag。　Ten　seconds　later　I've　got　Peter　Bart　calling　from　Variety；　asking　the　same　damn　question。　And　while　I'm　on　with　Peter；　trying　not　to　tell　him　an　out…and…out　lie　'cause　he　has　a　nose　for　bullshit；　I　have　a　call　from　People　on　the　other　line；　asking　the　same　question。　Coincidence？　I　don't　think　so。〃
　 Todd　moaned　behind　his　mask　of　bandages。
　 〃I've　told　Burrows　we　have　to　move　you；〃　Maxine　went　on。
　 〃Wait；　Donnie　said　yesterday　you　told　him　that　you　wanted　me　to　stay　here。〃
　 〃That　was　before　I　got　the　calls。　Now　it's　just　a　matter　of　time　before　some　photographer　finds　his　way　in　here。〃
　 〃Shit。　Shit。　Shit。〃
　 〃That　would　make　a　nice　little　picture；　wouldn't　it？〃　Maxine　said；　just　in　case　Todd　hadn't　already　got　a　snap…shot　in　his　mind's　eye。　〃You　lying　in　bed　with　your　face　all　bandaged　up。〃
　 〃Wait！〃　Todd　said；　〃They'd　never　be　able　to　prove　it　was　me。〃
　 〃The　point　is：　it　is　you；　Todd。　Whoever's　put　out　the　word　about　your　being　here　is　working　in　this　building。　They've　probably　got　access　to　your　records；　your　charts…〃
　 Todd　felt　a　spasm　of　the　same　panic　that　had　seized　him　when　he'd　first　woken　up。　The　horror　of　being　trapped。　This　time　he　governed　it；　determined　not　to　let　Maxine　see　him　losing　control。
　 〃So　when　are　you　getting　me　out　of　here？〃　he　said。
　 〃I've　got　a　car　ing　at　five　tomorrow　morning。　I've　told　Burrows　I　want　the　security　in　this　place　tripled　'til　you　leave。　We'll　take　you　to　the　beach　house　in　Malibu　until　we　find　somewhere　more　practical。〃
　 〃I　can't　go　home？〃　Todd　said；　knowing　even　as　he　floated　the　idea　that　it　was　out　of　the　question。　That　would　be　the　first　place　the　journalists　and　the　paparazzi　would　e　looking　for　him。
　 〃Maybe　we　should　fly　you　out　of　state　when　you're　feeling　a　little　better。　I'll　call　John；　see　if　I　can　get　him　to　fly　you　up　to　Montana。〃
　 〃I　don't　want　to　go　to　Montana。〃
　 〃You'd　be　a　lot　more　secure　up　there　than　here。　We　could　arrange　for　round…the…clock　nursing…〃
　 〃I　said　no。　I　don't　want　to　be　that　far　away　from　everything。〃
　 〃All　right；　we'll　find　some　place　here　in　the　city。　What　about　your　new　lady…friend？　Miss　Bosch？　She's　going　to　be　asking　questions　too。　What　do　you　want　me　to　tell　her？〃
　 〃She's　gone。　She's　shooting　something　in　the　Cayman　Islands。〃
　 〃She　was　fired；〃　Maxine　said。　〃'Creative　differences'　apparently。　The　director　wanted　her　to　show　her　tits　and　she　said　no。　Though　God　knows　some　of　her　runway　work　has　left　little　to　the　imagination。　I　don't　know　why　she's　got　coy　all　of　a　sudden。　Anyway；　she　wants　to　talk　to　you。　What　do　I　say？〃
　 〃Anything　you　like。〃
　 〃So　you　don't　want　her　in　on　this？〃
　 〃Fuck　no。　I　don't　want　anybody　to　know。〃
　 〃Okay。　It's　going　to　be　difficult；　but　okay。　I've　got　to　go。　Do　you　want　me　to　send　a　nurse　in　to　give　you　something　to　help　you　sleep？〃
　 〃Yeah。。。〃
　 〃We'll　find　a　place　for　you；　until　you　mend。　I'll　ask　Jerry　Brahms。　He　knows　the　city　back　to　front。　All　we　need's　a　little　hideaway。　It　needn't　be　fancy。〃
　 〃Just　make　sure　he　doesn't　get　wind　of　what's　going　on；〃　Todd　said。　〃Jerry　talks。〃
　 〃Give　me　a　little　credit；〃　Maxine　replied。　〃I'll　see　you　tomorrow　morning。　You　get　some　sleep。　And　don't　worry；　nobody's　going　to　find　out　where　you　are　or　what's　happened。　I'll　kill　'em　first。〃
　 〃Promise。〃
　 〃With　my　bare　hands。〃
　 So　saying；　she　was　out　of　the　room；　leaving　Todd　alone　and　in　the　dark。
　 Donnie　was　right；　of　course。　This　was　undoubtedly　the　stupidest　thing　he　had　ever　done。　But　there　was　no　going　back　on　it。　Life；　like　a　movie；　only　made　sense　running　in　one　direction。　What　could　he　do　but　go　with　the　flow；　and　hope　to　hell　there　was　a　happy　ending　waiting　for　him　in　the　last　reel？
　
　 A　storm　moved　in　off　the　Pacific　in　the　middle　of　the　night；　the　seventh　storm　of　that　winter；　and　the　worst。　Over　the　next　forty…eight　hours　it　would　dump　several　inches　of　rain　along　the　coast　from　Monterey　to　San　Diego；　creating　a　catalogue　of　minor　disasters。　Storm…drains　overflowed　and　turned　the　streets　of　Santa　Barbara　into　white…water　rivers；　two　citizens　and　seven　street…people　were　swept　away　and　drowned。　Power…lines　were　brought　down　by　the　furious　winds；　the　most　badly　struck　area　being　Orange　County；　where　a　number　of　munities　remained　without　power　for　the　next　three　days。　Along　the　Pacific　Coast　Highway；　where　the　wildfires　of　the　previous　autumn　had　stripped　the　hillsides　of　vegetation；　the　naked　earth；　no　longer　knitted　together　by　roots；　turned　into　mud　and　slid　down　onto　the　road。　There　were　countless　accidents；　fourteen　people　perished；　including　a　family　of　seven　Mexicans；　who'd　only　been　in　the　promised　land　four　hours；　having　skipped　over　the　border　illegally。　All　burned　up　together；　trapped　in　their　overturned　truck。　In　the　Pacific　Palisades；　the　deluge　carried　away　several　million　dollar　homes；　in　Topanga　Canyon；　the　same。
　 Of　course　all　this　made　the　business　of　getting　Todd　from　the　hospital　to　Maxine's　beach…house　both　more　lengthy　and　frustrating　than　it　would　have　been　otherwise；　but　it　may　have　helped　to　keep　the　endeavor　secret。　Certainly　there　were　no　photographers　at　the　hospital　door　when　they　left；　nor　anybody　waiting　for　them　in　the　vicinity　of　the　beach…house。　But　that　didn't　mean　they　were　out　of　danger。　Calls　to　Maxine's　offices　inquiring　about　Todd's　condition　had　multiplied　exponentially；　and　they　were　now　ing　in　from　further　afield…several　from　Japan；　where　Gallows　had　just　opened…as　the　rumors　spread。　One　of　the　German　reporters　had　even　had　the　temerity　to　suggest　that　Todd　was　undergoing　plastic　surgery。
　 〃I　gave　him　hell。　Fucking　Kraut。〃
　 〃Aren't　you　German　on　your　mother's　side？〃
　 〃He's　still　a　fucking　Kraut。〃
　 Todd　was　sitting　in　the　back　of　Maxine's　Mercedes；　with　Nurse　Karyn…who　had　been　thoroughly　investigated　by　Maxine　and　judged　reliable…at　his　side。　The　nurse　was　a　woman　of　few　words：　but　those　she　chose　to　utter　usually　carried　some　punch。
　 〃I　don't　see　why　y'all　give　a　damn。　I　mean；　what　does　it　matter　if　somebody　gets　wind　of　it？　He　just　got　a　chemical　peel　and　a　few　nips　and　tucks。　What's　the　big　deal？〃
　 〃It's　not　something　Todd's　fans　need　to　know　about；〃　Maxine　replied。　〃They've　got　a　certain　idea　of　who　Todd　is。〃
　 〃So　they'd　think　it　wasn't　too　masculine？〃　Nurse　Karyn　said。　〃Shall　we　just　move　on　from　this？〃　Maxine　said；　catching　Nurse　Karyn's　gaze　in　the　driving　mirror；　and　shaking　her　head　to　indicate　that　the　conversation…or　at　least　this　portion　of　it…was　at　an　end。　Todd；　of　course；　saw　none　of　this。　He　was　still　bandaged　blind。　〃How　are　you　doing；　Todd？〃　Maxine　said。
　 〃Wondering　how　soon…〃
　 〃Soon；〃　Maxine　said。　〃Soon。　Oh；　by　the　way；　I　had　a　word　with　Jerry　Brahms；　and　told　him　exactly　what　we　needed。　Two　hours　later　he　came　back　to　me；　said　he　had　the　perfect　house　for　you。　I'm　going　to　see　it　with　him　tomorrow〃
　 〃Did　he　tell　you　where　it　was？〃
　 〃Somewhere　up　in　the　hills。　Apparently；　it　was　a　place　he　used　to　go　and　play　when　he　was　a　kid。　I　guess　this　is　in　the　forties。　He　says　it's　pletely　secluded。　Nobody's　going　to　e　bothering　you。〃
　 〃He's　full　of　shit。　They　have　fucking　bus　tours　up　in　the　hills。　Every　other　house　has　somebody　famous　living　in　it。〃
　 〃That's　what　I　told　him。　But　he　swore　this　house　was　ideal。　Nobody　even　knows　about　the　canyon　it's　in。　That's　what　he　said。　So　we'll　see。　If　it　isn't　any　good　for　you；　I'll　keep　looking。〃
　
　 Later　that　afternoon；　Burrows　came　out　to　the　beach…house　to　change　Todd's　dressings。　It　was　a　surreal　ritual　for　all　concerned：　Todd　semi…recumbent　on　the　deco　sofa　in　the　large　window　overlooking　the　beach；　Maxine　sitting　at　a　distance；　nursing　an　early　vodka　stinger；　Burrows…his　confidence　tentatively　back　in　place　after　the　prickly　exchanges　of　the　previous　day…chatting　about　the　rain　and　the　mud…slides　while　he　delicately　removed　the　bandages。
　 〃Now　the　area　around　your　eyes　is　going　to　be　a　little　gummed　up；〃　he　warned　Todd；　〃so　don't　try　and　open　your　eyes　until　I've　done　some　cleaning。〃
　 Todd　said　nothing。　He　was　just　listening　to　the　boom　of　his　heart　in　his　head；　and　outside；　the　boom　of　the　storm…stirred　waves。　They　were　out　of　step　with　one　another。
　 〃I　wonder；〃　Burrows　said　to　Maxine；　〃if　you'd　mind　closing　the　blinds　a　little　way？　I　don't　want　it　to　be　too　bright　in　here　when　I　uncover　Todd's　eyes。〃
　 Todd　heard　Maxine　crossing　to　the　window；　then　the　mechanical　hum　of　the　electric　blinds　as　they　were　lowered。
　 〃I　think　that'll　be　far　enough；〃　Burrows　said。　A　click；　and　the　hum　stopped。　〃Now；　let's　see　how　things　look　Hold　very　still；　Todd；　please。〃
　 Todd　held　his　breath　as　the　dressing　which　the　bandages　had　kept　in　place　was　gently　teased　away　from　his　face。　It　felt　as　though　a　layer　of　his　skin　was　ing　away　along　with　the　gauze。　He　heard　a　little　intake　of　breath　from　Maxine。　〃What？〃　he　murmured。
　 〃It's　okay；〃　Burrows　said　softly。　〃Please　hold　still。　This　is　a　very　delicate　procedure。　By　the　way；　when　I　put　the　new　dressing　on；　I'll　be　leaving　holes　for　your　eyes；　so　you'll　be　able　to。。。very　still；　please。。。good；　good。。。so　you'll　be　able　to　see。〃
　 〃Maxine。。。？〃
　 〃Please；　Todd。　Don't　move　a　muscle。〃
　 〃I　want　her　to　tell　me　what　it　looks　like。〃
　 〃She　can't　see　yet；　Todd。〃
　 Burrows　said　something　to　his　nurse；　half　under　his　breath。　Todd　didn't　cat